Tapping Q & A with Gene Monterastelli - Get the most out of tapping and EFT

Pod #530: The sneaky emotion we need to tap for

by

One of the characteristics I most love about my clients is their capacity for compassion and their awareness of the suffering and struggles of others. Because this is the case, my clients are helpers and healers to others.

And this is a wonderful thing!

At the same time, when we are aware of the suffering of others, we have a tendency to shortchange our own transformation.

We end up saying things like “I have it so much better than other people.”

But just because we are more fortunate than many others doesn't mean that we have to shortchange our transformation or feel selfish because we are taking care of ourselves.

The reality is if you feel (consciously or subconsciously) you are being selfish by trying to heal, then you will sabotage any efforts to create healing and transformation in your life.

In this week's podcast I am sharing a tap-along I did with one of the participants in the ID Transformation Retreat. During our follow-up sessions, a week after the retreat, one of the participants shared how selfish she was feeling for spending her time, money and focus on the retreat day.

The tapping I am sharing helped her to recognize that taking care of herself is not selfish, but actually an empowering step towards being the person she wants to be in the world.

Even if you don't think this is an issue you struggle with, I encourage you to tap along. I believe that this is one of the hidden issues that holds many of us back from creating the life we want.

On the off-chance you have this belief lurking in your subconscious mind, it is worth taking a few minutes to tap along to this.

You can find the full tapping script of this audio as a pdf over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts.

Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support

Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Android | Google Podcast | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio

Pod #529: Releasing the struggle of transformation

by

Last Saturday I ran the ID Transformation Retreat. Over the course of the day we had the opportunity to heal and release many past ideas and beliefs that we have about ourselves.

As the day was drawing to a close, I gave everyone the chance to ask any lingering questions. Here is what one of the participants shared:

I'm feeling a lot of emotions today. I feel like some of it is related to the tool about letting things go. I have recognized that I have all that I need within me to be the type of person I want to be. I feel like a lot of the emotions today were letting go of my old self.

AND there's a lot of grief about that. All day long there have been so many emotions and I just wanted to ask about any advice you have for dealing with this outflow of emotion.

My response was the tapping session I am sharing with you today. We tapped for letting go of our past selves, honoring who we were in the past, acknowledging the change we want, and accepting the change we are going through.

The tapping was powerful and the perfect way to wrap up the day.

As you are going through any sort of change, big or small, this is the perfect way to consolidate the process and make the change easier.

Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support

Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Android | Google Podcast | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio

Look at this little pumpkin

by

I would like to introduce you to someone. Look at this cute little pumpkin!

That's me when I was little. (I'm the one on the left.)

I know! It’s hard to believe. No surprise that one of my nicknames growing up was “Whitey” because my hair was so blond it was almost white.

For the last two weeks I have been spending lots of time with this little guy.

AND what I mean by that is I've been focusing my morning tapping sessions on working with myself at this young age.

I have been:

  • listening to his fears
  • giving him advice
  • asking for his input
  • creating safe spaces

But mostly I have just been showering him with love!

In every one of these sessions I have cried at some point.

It all starts somewhere
The reason I have been spending so much time with my younger self is because of the way the human brain works.

The reason hypnosis works is because when you are being hypnotized, your brain changes states. It goes from beta waves (awake) to alpha waves (relaxed) to theta waves (deep hypnosis). In the theta state we can create deep change and transformation as we are able to rewrite what is in the subconscious mind. We are able to learn and change quickly.

Before the age of seven we spend almost all of our time in either the alpha or theta brain wave state.

It makes sense that our brain is in hyper learning mode at the ages we are doing the most learning.

The lessons that were never intended to be lessons
Because we are so open to learning at this point in our lives, we take everything we learn as true.

On one hand, it is great that we can learn so quickly at this time in our lives.

On the other hand, we can see how quickly this can go wrong.

For example:

  • If we are around a frustrated adult who says something like “I wish you were never born” we can learn that we shouldn't be alive
  • If we are playing and look up to see that the adult who was looking after us has left the room, we can learn people can't be trusted and they will abandon us
  • If we are around people who are sarcastic and joking and one adult says to another “you'll be lucky to find anyone to marry you” we can learn that finding someone to love is hard
  • If an adult slams down the phone to a telemarketer and mutters “sleazy salesman” then we can learn all salespeople are sleazy

And the list goes on.

Even when we are surrounded by well-meaning, loving adults it is possible to learn the “wrong” lessons when we are very young and don't understand the world.

At this particular stage in our lives, the lessons we learn are treated by our brains as truths, rather than beliefs that can be questioned.

The subconscious gets its way
Because the mind works this way it can cause frustration and pain.

It puts us in a situation where our conscious mind can see the world through the eyes of a thoughtful adult, while the subconscious mind sees the world through the lessons we learned when we were young.

AND (and this is a big and) the subconscious mind always wins.

Have you noticed how seldom New Year's resolutions work? That's because they are an act of the conscious mind trying to change the beliefs of the subconscious mind.

I've been spending a lot of time with the little guy above because I am trying to uncover and understand all the lessons he learned that no longer serve me.

Wanting to change is not enough
If we truly want to change our lives, we need to do more than a little tapping here and there. We also need to change the beliefs we have about ourselves and the world.

I created the ID Transformation Retreat with exactly that in mind. I want you to be able to participate in an experience where you can uncover and unpack the beliefs that are keeping you stuck and holding you back from living a life you love.

This event will be different from most of the events I run. Usually my emphasis is on teaching tools and techniques that you can use later when tapping on your own or with clients.

At the ID Transformation Retreat we will be doing HEAPS of tapping!

Because this isn't about learning, it is about healing.

Don't get me wrong, you will still learn a lot, but that is not the main aim of the event.

Here's how the ID Transformation Retreat will work:

Before the event you will receive a series of short videos from me. Each video will teach you a tapping tool you can use to do deep work on your own. Sharing these ahead of the event means I won't have to spend as much time teaching during the retreat. It will take you less than an hour to watch all the videos AND doing so ahead of the event is not a prerequisite. Instead, they are designed to set the table for those who are interested in the hows and whys of the tools we'll be using together at the retreat.

During the retreat we'll unpack known and unknown limiting beliefs and we will transform and heal them. I will be tapping with volunteers one-on-one, we are going to do loads of group tapping, and there will be a chance to learn from the insights and transformation of others.

After the event I am going to hold a bonus session where you can ask any questions that arise after the event, and we'll do more tapping.

You have seven days to listen to the replays so that if you can't join us live, you can still participate AND even if you are there live, you can tap to the sessions again and again.

All the details
Here are the details:

  • Live one-day retreat on Zoom, from 10 AM to 5:45 PM Eastern US on Saturday, April 23rd
  • 7-day access to the replay so you can work through it again and again
  • A library of tapping tools to transform your identity that you can download and keep
  • Bonus Q&A session on Friday, April 29th at 8 PM Eastern US

Notice that the bonus session is at 8 PM on Friday night. I planned this especially for those who live in Asia, Australia, and New Zealand who don't want to stay up all night to tap with me on Friday 23rd. Everyone is welcome to join the bonus session, but I wanted to make sure I did something special for those on the other side of the world.

The ID Transformation Retreat only costs $247.

That's less than the cost of working with me for an hour AND you will get a full day of transformation for that price.

You can sign up here: http://idtransformationretreat.com/

Limited Space
I want this to be as personal of an experience as possible, so I am limiting registration to just 100 people. Once 100 people have registered, registration will close.

Don't miss out: http://idtransformationretreat.com/

If you have any questions, reply to this note and I get right back to you.

I really hope you can join us. It is going to be an amazing day of healing and transformation.

Gene

Pod #528: 5 ways to set every tapping session up to be successful

by

Although you can learn tapping in just a few minutes, it can take a lifetime to uncover all the subtle nuances in its application.

Over the course of years of doing thousands of tapping sessions with clients, I have learned that there are few simple steps we can take at the beginning of a session to make the healing process quicker and smoother.

A few weeks ago I gave a presentation at the Spring Energy Event on 5 simple things that you can do to begin a tapping session to get the most out of it.

This week's podcast is that presentation. All of the tapping phrases that I talk about during this presentation can be found in this download

Support the podcast!

Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Android | Google Podcast | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio

Pod #527: How to tap when you hit emotional rock bottom

by

Tapping is an amazing tool that can help us to turn our mood around when we are going through a rough patch. It can also be powerful enough to clear out deeply rooted traumas and limiting beliefs.

When tapping for these types of issues the approach is fairly straightforward. Sometimes we are too close to the issue to tap effectively on our own and then the help of a skill tapping practitioner can be invaluable. Even when this happens, the process of the work itself is easy to understand.

There are other times where we just don't know where to start, such as when we hit rock bottom emotionally. This is way more than a low mood or a couple of challenging days. Hitting rock bottom means feeling overwhelmed by negative emotions, and any relief provided by tapping is fleeting.

In this week's podcast I share a straightforward four-step process you can use when you hit one of these patches. It's a useful process for rough times in general, but particularly potent when you are in despair and feel unable to bounce back from rock bottom.

Support the podcast!

Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Android | Google Podcast | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio

Understanding The “Energy” in Energy Psychology

by

In an effort to make the research around tapping more accessible to the general public David Feinstein, Ph. D., is writing summaries of these studies. You can find all the summaries that have been shared so far here.

In more than 120 clinical trials, energy psychology, which is the umbrella term for the Emotional Freedom Techniques, Thought Field Therapy, “tapping, “and related approaches, has been shown to deliver significant improvements across a wide range of psychological and physiological conditions with striking speed and durability.

But despite impressive results in clients with issues ranging from PTSD and depression to cardiovascular and immune disorders, many therapists and clinicians dismiss the approach because of the vague and often controversial use of the term energy in energy psychology. Read more>>>

About David: DAVID FEINSTEIN, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist and a pioneer in developing innovative therapeutic approaches, leading to nine national awards for his books on consciousness and healing. He and his wife, Donna Eden, have built the world’s largest and most vibrant organization teaching energy medicine. Their latest award-winning book, The Energies of Love, achieved best-seller status on the NY Times Relationship List. David has served on the faculties of The Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine, Antioch College, and the California School of Professional Psychology.

Pod #526: The step most people skip when tapping

by

If you are in any way familiar with tapping, then you have repeatedly heard how important it is to get to the root cause of an issue. The thinking is that by finding and dealing with the root cause, we will be able to take care of the whole issue.

Much like if you kill the roots of a plant, the entire plant will wilt and die.

This teaching makes perfect sense but I think most people make a critical error when trying to implement it. And that mistake is that they focus only on the root cause, to the exclusion of everything else.

I believe there is an essential step we should take before diving into the root cause. Adding this step means we can clear root causes more quickly AND enjoy longer lasting results.

In this week's podcast I talk about what I believe is a key step to transformation and how you can implement it in your own tapping work right away.

Support the podcast! Http://tappingqanda.com/support

Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Android | Google Podcast | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio

25 Must Listen To Episodes From The First 12 Years Of The Tapping Q & A Podcast

by

March 3rd, 2022 is the 12 year anniversary of the first episode of the Tapping Q and A Podcast. As a way to mark this occasion I have put together the list of what I think are the most essential episodes of the podcast. The list includes the most commonly asked question, the most preterite information, my personal favorites, and the listener's favorites over the years.

In these 25 episodes you can receive a master class in tapping.

If you would like to track your progress of listening to these episodes I created a simple tracking sheet you can printout to follow along with.

Here is to 12 more years of tapping with you!

Most common questions:

  • Part 1: Making Tapping A Part Of Your Daily Routine – Pod #335
  • Part 2: Why do I keep having to deal with the same issues over and over again? – Pod #336
  • Part 3: Tapping for Clutter – Pod #337
  • Part 4: Tapping for Self-Criticism – Pod #339
  • Part 5: There are so many issues. Where do I start with Tapping? – Pod #340

Understanding how tapping works and how to talk about it with others:

  • Why Tapping Works w/ David Feinstein, PhD – Pod #471
  • Sharing Information About Tapping with Others w/ Robin Bilazarian – Pod #306
  • All About The Tapping Points w/ Beth Kearn – Pod #232

My personal favorites:

  • Tapping for Long-Term Transformation w/ Rick Hanson, Ph.D. – Pod #349
  • ​​How We Inherit Trauma Genetically w/ Mark Wolynn – Pod #292
  • Tools to add to your Tapping Tool Box w/ Kris Ferraro – Pod #367
  • The Tapping I Do To Start Each Day – Pod #333
  • Why You SHOULD Swear While Using Tapping – Pod #310

Fan favorites:

  • Tapping for Resistance to Intentions and Progress – Pod #302
  • Tapping for Anxiety and Worry w/ Julie Schiffman – Pod #352
  • Tapping for Feeling Stillness and Peace – Pod #301
  • Releasing Limiting Beliefs – Pod #314
  • Intention Based Tapping w/ Steve Wells – Pod #347
  • How You See Yourself Can Stop Your Healing w/ Brad Yates – Pod #353
  • Tapping To Stay Healthy During Cold And Flu Season – Pod #195
  • Letting Go of Limiting and Unhelpful Beliefs – Pod #268
  • How To End A Tapping Session – Pod #405
  • Tapping For A Good Night's Sleep – Pod #250
  • How To Get More Out Of Your Goals With Tapping – Pod #435
  • When The Body Is The “Enemy” and Weight Release Is A “Battle” – Pod #377

How Tapping Can Bring Peace and Healing to Survivors of Earthquakes, Shootings, Pandemics, and Other Disasters

by

In an effort to make the research around tapping more accessible to the general public David Feinstein, Ph. D., is writing summaries of these studies. You can find all the summaries that have been shared so far here.

The number of natural disasters, from hurricanes and tornadoes to floods and forest fires, has nearly doubled in the past decade compared to the previous decade due largely, according to the United Nations, to “extreme weather events.” Meanwhile, human-made disasters–such as mass shootings, warfare, violent conflicts impacting civilian populations, and industrial accidents–have also increased exponentially.

Whether natural or otherwise, disasters can severely impact mental health. Between 30 and 60 percent of individuals who survive a disaster suffer with the symptoms of PTSD, and all must deal with enormous emotional and practical challenges. Even for those who do not develop PTSD, symptoms of anxiety, depression, paranoia, sleep disturbance, substance abuse, and stress-related physical illness are not unusual. Based on hundreds of reports from the field and a growing number of formal studies, energy psychology or acupoint tapping has been remarkably effective in the treatment of trauma-based psychological difficulties. Read more >>>

About David: DAVID FEINSTEIN, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist and a pioneer in developing innovative therapeutic approaches, leading to nine national awards for his books on consciousness and healing. He and his wife, Donna Eden, have built the world’s largest and most vibrant organization teaching energy medicine. Their latest award-winning book, The Energies of Love, achieved best-seller status on the NY Times Relationship List. David has served on the faculties of The Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine, Antioch College, and the California School of Professional Psychology.

Pod #525:  What to do when you are frustrated by your slow rate of progress and transformation

by

One of the foundational beliefs of the work I do is that every part of our system is working for our highest good. Even when the system isn't working perfectly, we can appreciate its intention is that we are healthy and safe.

For example, the part of me that is preventing me from talking about the work I do for a living is trying to help me avoid rejection, even though intellectually I know that not talking about my work will hinder my success. I know the approach isn't helpful, but I can appreciate why the resistance exists.

This is great except when we are unsure why the resistance is holding us back.

Recently, I was tapping on an issue with the phrase “I appreciate that this resistant part of my system is trying to keep me healthy, even though the way it is going about it is actually holding me back.”

Before I even finished saying the phrase, another part of my system spoke up in what can only be described as a profanity-laced tantrum about how “No! It doesn't appreciate the resistance. AND the only reason I haven't healed is because of this #%^&*@ resistance!!!”

In this week’s podcast we look at how to tap when we are just like this part that’s frustrated at a lack of progress and unwilling to accept the intention of the resistance causing it.

You can find the full tapping script of this audio as a pdf over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts.

Support the podcast!

Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Android | Google Podcast | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio

Why Tapping Works – Six Evidence-Based Premises That Demonstrate the Power of Tapping

by

In an effort to make the research around tapping more accessible to the general public David Feinstein, Ph. D., is writing summaries of these studies. You can find all the summaries that have been shared so far here.

When acupoint tapping protocols were, in the 1980s, first formulated with a focus on psychological change, they were met with skepticism – even mockery – by the clinical community. But a lot has changed since then. Today, hundreds of clinical trials, peer-reviewed papers, and anecdotal reports show the positive – often rapid – transformational effects of energy psychology and tapping. Hidden within this growing literature are 6 fundamental evidence-based premises that demonstrate why tapping works and how it can be used as a remarkably powerful and effective technique in treating a myriad of challenging psychological and physiological issues. Read more >>>

About David: DAVID FEINSTEIN, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist and a pioneer in developing innovative therapeutic approaches, leading to nine national awards for his books on consciousness and healing. He and his wife, Donna Eden, have built the world’s largest and most vibrant organization teaching energy medicine. Their latest award-winning book, The Energies of Love, achieved best-seller status on the NY Times Relationship List. David has served on the faculties of The Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine, Antioch College, and the California School of Professional Psychology.

Pod #524: Tapping for when you feel out of control

by

Feeling out of control is one of the hardest emotions to overcome. This is true whether we feel personally out of control or if our circumstances feel that way.

The reality is that we are surrounded by things we do not control every single day, but we cope by recognizing that even though we don't control everything, we control enough to get what we want.

This week's podcast explores why the subconscious mind responds the way it does when we are feeling out of control and, more importantly, how to release that feeling. In the podcast I teach what you can do to prepare for situations that feel out of control and how tapping can help when you find yourself feeling out of control.

You can find the full tapping script of this audio as a pdf over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts.

Support the podcast!

Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Android | Google Podcast | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio

Pod #523: Tapping to release your old identities

by

As humans we are constantly changing and evolving.

Sometimes this happens gently over a long passage of time. At other times major events in our lives cause us to see ourselves and the world in new ways.

Even as this change is happening, our subconscious mind clings to the definitions of who we were and how the world was. It does this because the subconscious mind is most comfortable when the world is consistent and predictable.

The subconscious perceives change as unpredictable and therefore dangerous.

For that reason, the unconscious mind is slow to catch up when we change our definitions of ourselves. This means that even when we change how we see ourselves, our actions don't always match the new version of ourselves.

This week's podcast explores how we can tap to release outdated definitions of ourselves so that our actions can match who we are today.

You can find the full tapping script of this audio as a pdf over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts.

Support the podcast!

Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Android | Google Podcast | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio

How Acupoint Tapping Can Help Transform Relationships

by

In an effort to make the research around tapping more accessible to the general public David Feinstein, Ph. D., is writing summaries of these studies. You can find all the summaries that have been shared so far here.

Relationships are challenging for everyone, yet the quality of your relationships correlates strongly with your happiness, sense of well-being, and even your physical health. Can acupoint tapping help you and your clients address the challenging issues that even the best relationships bring our way? Practitioners are, in fact, finding that the answer to that question is “Yes!” Tapping can be effectively applied to foster greater intimacy, trust, understanding, and ease.

This month’s article takes a close look at the power of energy psychology for improving relationships. It shows how tapping can be used to develop 7 key relationship skills and includes revealing examples from Donna Eden’s 44-year relationship with her husband and closest collaborator, David Feinstein (hint: it’s not always been easy, even after it’s become wonderful!) Read more >>>

About David: DAVID FEINSTEIN, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist and a pioneer in developing innovative therapeutic approaches, leading to nine national awards for his books on consciousness and healing. He and his wife, Donna Eden, have built the world’s largest and most vibrant organization teaching energy medicine. Their latest award-winning book, The Energies of Love, achieved best-seller status on the NY Times Relationship List. David has served on the faculties of The Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine, Antioch College, and the California School of Professional Psychology.

Perfectionism Is Protection (That Is Running Amok)

by

Note: This article first appeared March 26th, 2014 and has been updated.

When the same topic shows up repeatedly in client sessions over a short period of time, it always gets my attention.

A significant number of my clients have recently been reporting that they are struggling with a tendency towards perfectionism. They tell me that it's getting in the way of their completing tasks and making progress.

Perfectionism generally shows up in two ways.

The first and most common way is spending way too much time on a task to make sure it is just perfect before moving on. This is especially prevalent when you are working on something that other people will see, such as creating a product or service for your business.

This kind of perfectionism becomes problematic because it causes us to fall behind schedule, or never get to the other tasks we need to address.

The second way that perfectionism presents itself is when we never make a start on certain tasks because of the subconscious fear that they won't turn out perfectly.

When humans lived in nomadic tribes many thousands of years ago, the world was a treacherous place. Danger lurked around every corner and we were hardwired for caution and safety. Humans didn't start anything they couldn't finish for fear of depleting precious reserves of energy that might be needed in a life threatening situation.

It's an understatement to point out that neither of these outcomes are useful!

Perfection Is Protection

At its core, perfectionism is really about keeping us safe. It is much less about something needing to be perfect because perfect is better, and more about fearing what may go wrong if it is not perfect.

Subconsciously you might worry that if something is not perfect:
It will end badly
You will be judged as not good enough
Others won’t trust you in the future
You will be found out to be a fraud

Those concerns might seem extreme, especially when perfectionism is focused on small daily tasks, but in reality that is what is happening.

What Could Go Wrong?

Below are some simple steps to help you interrupt your drive towards perfection.

I encourage you to tap the entire time you are doing this process. When I do exercises like this one, I often tap on my collar bone with my left hand and write out my answers with my right.

  1. First, imagine taking and completing the action you are struggling with.
  2. Next, tune in to whatever physical sensation arises when you are thinking about the action you are resisting. Ask that sensation “What would go wrong if I don’t do this perfectly?”
  3. Ask the sensation “What proof do I have that this is true?” This is one of my favorite questions because it reveals whatever is propping up the belief that something could go wrong. Does it produce a memory from the past? Tap on it! Does it unveil a limiting belief that we know isn’t true? Tap on it!
  4. Continue to tap on whatever comes up in response to these two questions!

By undermining the “proof,” we can also undermine the belief that something could go wrong. And when the fear of something going wrong is dislodged, then perfectionism doesn’t arise because it no longer needs to keep us safe. This leads us to taking more action, more progress, and feeling more comfortable with sharing our work with others.

Pod #522: Tapping for when you don’t feel like you belong

by

Sometimes we spend time with people whose lives are very different from our own.

They might have different jobs, make more money than us, have success or notoriety, or access to opportunities that we will never have.

When this happens it is so easy to feel like we don't belong. It can even undermine our confidence and sense of self-worth.

This week's podcast explores how we can respond to these kinds of situations and includes a tap-along to help you feel more secure and boost your self-esteem.

Support the podcast!

Subscribe in: Apple Podcast | iPhone | Android | Google Podcast | Spotify | Pandora | Amazon Music | iHeartRadio

What Tapping Has Taught Me That I Wish I Knew When I Was 13 (Tapping For Self-Respect)

by

I wasn’t the coolest of kids when I was in middle school. I was on the math team. At the age of 13 my feet were larger than my 6′ 2″ tall father's, although I was only 5′ 7″ at the time. AND to complete the picture, I had a mullet.

It wasn’t pretty.

I didn’t think my life was horrible or that I was a total loser. I wasn’t a complete loner. But I knew my place.

It was fine for me to be my quirky, funny self around my fellow nerds (back when being a nerd wasn’t cool like it is today). At the same time, when I was around anyone of a “higher” social status, I just kept my head down.

I felt that if I opened my mouth everyone would look at me and think, “I can’t believe what a waste of time he is, why is he hanging around us? Could he just leave?!”

This internal dialog persisted well into my twenties.

I can still remember one particular moment whilst I was at university. I was on campus early for training for a job I had in the resident halls. During a long afternoon break I sat with two guys I worked with who were older than me (and both former military). Their conversation lasted for almost two hours and I barely contributed a word.

I felt out of place…or more likely I “knew” my place, which was well below theirs.
As I think back to that moment, I can still imagine what it felt like to be a little kid who is tagging along with the big kids and hoping they wouldn't notice that I was there. In my memory, even though I was 20 years old, my body feels 4’ 10” tall.

Self-Respect

On swiss-miss.com my friend Tina Roth eisnberg featured the following quote from Joan Didion:

“Self-respect is a discipline, a habit of mind that can never be faked but can be developed, trained, coaxed forth.”

I really love this idea. It points to the fact self-respect isn’t something that is granted to us by an external source. It comes from within. Self-respect is all about recognizing your own worth AND (most importantly) it can be consciously nurtured and developed.

I wasn’t able to see that when I was younger. My understanding of my place in the world was based on where I perceived my rank in relation to everyone else. I was either an equal or I was below.

There were certainly many times where I faked belonging. I walked upright with a confident smile on my face. But just because I was projecting a sense of confidence and belonging didn’t mean that I was really comfortable inside of my own skin.

My personal journey with tapping, especially in my late thirties, has been about becoming more comfortable inside my own skin, which is really just another way of saying I have been working on self-respect.

If you are working on growing your own sense of self-respect, I encourage you to tap along to this script every day for a week. It won't take more than a few minutes, and doing it daily will be a huge boost:

I choose to know I am worthy of respect…I choose to know that I am worthy of respecting myself…I don’t need to do anything to prove that I am worthy of self-respect…I am made for self-respect…I don’t need to do anything to gain self-respect…I know I am not perfect…I know I make mistakes every day…I know there are things in my life I would like to improve…Even though I am not perfect…I am worthy of self-respect…I am worthy of seeing that I am good…I am worthy of seeing that I am lovable…It is possible to see that I am worthy and still know that I would like better…By respecting myself I am not holding back my growth…Self-respect will not hold back my healing…Who I am is not determined by other people…Who I am is not determined by what others think…My value is not determined by other people…My value is not determined by what other people think of me…I choose to know I am worthy…I choose to know I am lovable…I choose to know that I am deserving…I choose to know that I am worthy of being heard…I am worthy even if I sometimes find that hard to believe…My belief in my worthiness is not a prerequisite to my worthiness…Even if I don’t believe it right now, I am worth of love and respect.

2021 Tapping Challenge: Day 30 – Tapping for thanksgiving for the opportunity to change

by

It is so easy to look at the progress of others and feel as if you aren't moving fast enough. It is natural to want the same results and transformation of those around us.

Today we are going to tap for tapping for thanksgiving for the opportunity to change.

Thanks for taking part in the November 30-Day Tapping Challenge!

Don’t forget to sign up to receive daily reminders so that you don’t miss a day of tapping.

If you liked today's video, please share it with a friend.

2021 Tapping Challenge: Day 29 – Tapping to trust your intuition

by

It is so easy to look at the progress of others and feel as if you aren't moving fast enough. It is natural to want the same results and transformation of those around us.

Today we are going to tap for tapping to trust your intuition.

Thanks for taking part in the November 30-Day Tapping Challenge!

Don’t forget to sign up to receive daily reminders so that you don’t miss a day of tapping.

If you liked today's video, please share it with a friend.