Tapping Q & A with Gene Monterastelli - Get the most out of tapping and EFT

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Every day in the month of November I will be posting a brand new free tap-along video to my website and I am going to encourage you to tap along with me.

This week I spent some time working on the list of topics I plan to cover in the videos, based on the questions I’ve been receiving in my inbox and the conversations I’ve been having with my clients.

Do you have a topic you think I should cover? If so, I would love to hear from you.

As an incentive, I am giving away two free 30-minute one-on-one Zoom sessions with me.

One of those sessions will be awarded to the person who submits the topic I like the best. The other session will be given to someone selected at random.

Filed Under: Q&A

Round Up Question 5 – What is one thing you wish your clients believed about the healing process?

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One of my favorite aspects of the tapping community is how willing people are to share their wisdom and experience. Recently I asked a number of practitioners I admire about how they approach healing, client work, and their own journey. Below are some of my favorite answers to one of those questions. Make sure you check out all five questions.

What is one thing you wish your clients believed about the healing process?

When Fear directs the process, healing slows down. When the Soul or Love directs the process, miracles can happen. Their journey into healing, wholeness, and mystical awakening is their unique journey. Their pace is perfect and their progress is perfect. Learning to reset from fear into love is simply part of your journey. Alan Davidson

Keep trying other modalities until you find the one for you. In the Energy Psychology world, this might be EFT, Heart Assisted Therapy (HAT), Tapas Acupressure Techniques (TAT), Brief Energy Correction (BEC), and more. Try another practitioner, too if you are not making progress. You are worth it, pursue your healing journey any way and anywhere you can. Robin Bilazarian, LCSW

That it is indeed a process! That it can take twists and turns. Things that seem unrelated to their current concern can arise and it’s important for them to be addressed. It is a cliché, but so true: trust the process. This is work. It’s the most important work anyone can ever do. And it is so, so worth it! Kris Ferraro

I wish they knew and believed that the healing process can be gentle, easy, beautiful and an amazing process filled with so much love. Deborah D Miller

100% percent belief that they will heal. I think we have been so conditioned by the media and schooling that we have limiting beliefs around nature’s ability to heal us. We put the power outside of ourselves, rather than owning our own power. Years ago the shaman would just perform a ritual and the person would heal. Their own belief system worked for them effortlessly. For me it is about getting back that trust in natural healing methods.
Tania A Prince

I wish my clients believed that a recurrence of an emotional upset or issue is a normal part of the healing process. It doesn’t mean that they have failed to ‘do this right’ or failed to make any progress. I wish they could distinguish when they have made progress and see that they are now being presented with a new opportunity to heal further. Ange Finn

I wished they believed that the healing process is their human right. That an innate desire for healing and growth is built into human biology – and if we can find a way to provide the conditions of psychological/emotional safety, the human system will move toward a natural evolution. And of course, that even though there are miracles along the way, the process of healing is a lifelong endeavour. The possibilities are endless. Nancy Forester

There is never just one answer or one way to move through the healing process. You may feel up, down, sideways or crooked for days…even months. And then suddenly the movements and synchronicities start to shift and shine through. Truly, anything is possible. I wish everyone believed this. Every person has the power within to heal. Julie Schiffman

The importance of noticing small changes in the right direction. Mary Ayers

That they are not victims of the process, but they are in charge of it. Once they understand that they are an integral part of the underlying process, they then start to use it more effectively and extricate themselves from being victims. Ted Robinson

I believe that any belief that doesn’t serve you can be changed. If I could get my clients (and the world) to believe that, I would be content with that as my life’s work.
Pamela Bruner

You are designed as a divine being that has the ability to constantly renew yourself. Just like a wound on your skin, this is the regenerative process that occurs naturally, whether you want it or not. Emotional wounds will not heal if they are not allowed to through remembrance of these with resentment, anger, fear and hate. If you inundate your soul with Love and forgiveness, you will heal. Remember an emotion is not a fact…you can let it go.
Till Schilling

Don’t judge the shift by the drama! For whatever reason, some clients believe that they need a massive cathartic experience with lots of drama to change and heal. Yet, in the hands of a skilled practitioner, healing can be gentle, subtle and complete.
Rod Sherwin

I wish they believed that it can be fun. It doesn’t have to be deadly serious and earnestly heartfelt all the time. Humor is so healing in itself, and to mix it into any healing process is a total blessing. I have found that it really speeds things up. It goes against the common belief that unless the healing is a struggle, it’s not worth much. I wished they believed that the healing process can feel good — because it most definitely can.
Janet Hilts

Round Up Question 4 – What is one thing you wish your clients believed about themselves?

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One of my favorite aspects of the tapping community is how willing people are to share their wisdom and experience. Recently I asked a number of practitioners I admire about how they approach healing, client work, and their own journey. Below are some of my favorite answers to one of those questions. Make sure you check out all five questions.

What is one thing you wish your clients believed about themselves?

That they are enough. Rather than being broken, or permanently wounded…They already have everything they will ever need to be healthy, happy, enlightened, and to thrive in their unique soul's destiny. They have an inner source of wisdom, guidance, and healing that can direct their healing journey. Learn to know and trust that inner source. Alan Davidson

That there is nothing 'wrong' with them. To let go of the perception that outside forces could fix them, vs. inside wisdom and cultivation. To investigate more truthfully, using current eyes, heart, mind…the idea that they are Not Good Enough…I'd ask them to ask themselves…'good enough for whom? Good enough to get…what? Good enough to be/have…what?' To have them believe that there is never 'too much' to heal or fix or resolve…and that it's never too late to start, although as I said above, now is a better time than later, and always is a better plan than occasionally. : ) Jondi Whitis

My job is to meet them where they are at and start right there, not to wish they believed something about themselves. Where they are at is where they are at. Gwyneth Moss

Humility and magnanimity aren't contradictory; they are two essential pillars in character formation. Jake Khym

Globally, I wish each client knew that they are enough. That they don’t need to change for anyone or anything. They are worthy enough and they are competent enough. Specifically for each client, I wish they knew that the stories of inadequacy they are telling themselves which lead to the discomfortable feelings of shame, guilt, anxiety and chronic physical conditions – are just untrue. That they actually have little to no credible evidence supporting any of these stores of their limitations. Nancy Forester

I am moving away from the belief that my clients should attach to any particular beliefs, I am happy for them to be whoever and whatever they choose, and if they need certain beliefs to see them through, they are entitled to believe what they choose. Of course, if they are suffering I'd love them to know that it is really all just BS and can be changed. Steve Wells

That the past does not define them…that even if they didn't get the best foundation in their family of origin, that foundation can be altered and added too. Mary Ayers

I wish they would accept that they are the “storytellers” of their life and they establish the illusions and then place themselves into each story perfectly to learn a new lesson each time. If they could accept that, they could then tell different stories and learn different lessons that I believe would be more beneficial for them.
Ted Robinson

That persistence is sometimes the key.
Alina Frank

One thing I wish they believed is that it’s OK to ask for help or use EFT yourself as a first resort instead of the last resort. I wish they believed that bucking up is being unnecessarily hard on themselves. In our culture, suffering is highly overrated!
Janet Hilts

Round Up Question 3 – If you were to start your own healing journey over again what would you do differently?

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One of my favorite aspects of the tapping community is how willing people are to share their wisdom and experience. Recently I asked a number of practitioners I admire about how they approach healing, client work, and their own journey. Below are some of my favorite answers to one of those questions. Make sure you check out all five questions]

If you were to start your own healing journey over again what would you do differently?

I would have moved at a faster pace and more consistently sought support and assistance along the way. I truly appreciated my first therapist, who helped me through a divorce crisis, but I didn’t continue ‘doing the work’ – I think I thought I was good to go. In a long second bout of therapy, I got out of danger. If I had it to do over, I think I’d appreciate and pursue the value of great and artful support to help me evolve and thrive along the way vs waiting until I hit a crisis point to seek help. Jondi Whitis

Less study, more practice. In the early days, I read every newsletter, attended classes, poured over each version of Gary Craig’s EFT Manual. I truly wish I had simply tapped more. Instead of trying to “get it right”, if I had tapped more and been present in my body, the energy of EFT would have shown me what I needed to learn. I would have gotten to know myself and my own energy field better, faster, and more effectively. Going from head to body has been imperative for my own healing. Kris Ferraro

Do more of my own personal formation and work around self-discovery and self-possession. Jake Khym

I’d get myself into a regular routine and maintain it. I’ve learned that although routine is boring and sometimes feels like a slog, it’s important for retraining our nervous systems and is worth maintaining. I was always looking for the excitement of feeling blissful, not understanding that the work is gradual, non-linear, and builds on itself if you keep doing it. Ange Finn

I would have liked to reach the understanding that lack of money is a symptom of something else sooner rather than later. I spent a lot of time and money trying to make more money when instead it would have been to understand what money meant to me and what the lack of it was protecting me from. Rod Sherwin

Round Up Question 2 – What is something you have changed your mind about when it comes to healing, working with clients, or your own transformation process?

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One of my favorite aspects of the tapping community is how willing people are to share their wisdom and experience. Recently I asked a number of practitioners I admire about how they approach healing, client work, and their own journey. Below are some of my favorite answers to one of those questions. Make sure you check out all five questions.

What is something you have changed your mind about when it comes to healing, working with clients, or your own transformation process?

That I’m not their source. I’m not their guru, I’m not “taking on” patients. I’m here to assist them, not help them, so by being connected myself, they find that connection within them. Kim D’Eramo, D.O.

Whole healing focuses on the whole person. There isn’t one technique that works for everyone all the time. I searched for years. Some techniques do have miraculous stories of healing. Those clients’ core issues were often found in one layer of the human experience: physical, emotional, mental, moral, or spiritual (energetic). A deep wound or trauma usually affects most or all the layers. Whole healing, moving beyond surviving into thriving, focuses on the flow of vibrant life through all five layers of the human experience. Alan Davidson

That helping clients heal is more in the things like the quality of presence, the amount of palpable safety you can help them connect with, the felt sense of compassionate patience and witness you create for them to ‘unpack their own suitcases’ much more than the specific modality or tools you use. Jondi Whitis

Before learning EFT/Tapping, I practiced as a psychotherapist who never asked about the body and the physicality of stress. I only focused on thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. I missed an entire dimension of information and intervention. Robin Bilazarian, LCSW

Recently I’ve come more to use no-words tapping, similar to Gunilla Hamne and Ulf Sandström’s Trauma Tapping Technique (TTT) method, when starting out with a new client or teaching people to tap for themselves. No words takes the edge off, doesn’t confuse, and people are more likely to use tapping for themselves when they don’t have to worry about what to say. In training starting with no-words tapping gets the message across that the tapping does the work. It’s then easier to get people out of suggestions and using language to influence. Gwyneth Moss

When I first started I thought the transformation process was about healing the emotional and physical body. After working with children with cancer, I realized that healing the body wasn’t the only goal. Sometimes the transformation process was about getting better physically and living a longer, happier life. Sometimes it was about helping the person release false beliefs and actually leave their body with an inner calm and peace. Both journeys are beautiful and heart-warming. Deborah D Miller

Sometimes the healing process brings deeper restoration than quick healing fixes. Jake Khym

When I first came into the healing profession I came from a science background. At some level that limited me, I didn’t believe that the techniques could heal everything. It didn’t fit with my “scientific perspective”. Now I am very different. I believe everything is possible. I am open to the possibility of what may happen when I work with clients. The reason for this is that I have seen so many amazing transformations through the years. Transformations that have occurred even when the client’s doctors have said, nothing more can be done to help you with this problem. Tania A Prince

I changed my mind about the need to try relentlessly to get everything down to zero, with myself and with others. I’ve learned to help my clients understand that getting an issue to a low but manageable level can sometimes be enough, so that we don’t put pressure on ourselves to achieve complete neutrality on an issue. Ange Finn

That healing can happen in an instant – it doesn’t need to take weeks or months. Peta Stapleton

We are all more resilient than we think we are. Just when you think nothing can change or when you think you have done everything possible to make a change, or when you think you have to learn to live with pain, or it’s just meant to be this way…there is always another way. There is ALWAYS another way. Julie Schiffman

I now know from experience that many of the things I accepted as true about me were really just beliefs that I had attached to. Now, I don’t accept anything is necessarily set in concrete, everything is potentially open to change. Steve Wells

Trying to force change with affirmations doesn’t work: No one likes to be told what to do. Trying to force change by tapping in positive affirmation usually results in more resistance to change. Instead, I would rather tapping on the resistance and barriers to change and then test if the affirmation feels real rather than trying to beat it into me.
This also applies to the more extreme forms of personal change where the consequences of not changing are magnified to cause you so much pain that your system cannot stay there and instead you must go to a different place. There are much more gentle ways to make change without the fear, drama, and intensity. Rod Sherwin

I used to believe that everyone wants to heal as quickly as possible, but that just isn’t true. The blocks and reversals that go along with chronic conditions stand in the way of full alignment between the subconscious and conscious choice to heal quickly.
Alina Frank

When I first started working with clients, I was very intent on being totally present and very observant. I think I was afraid I would miss some all-important signals, and therefore shortchange my clients.
Over time I came to realize that the more relaxed I am, the more easily I can tune in to the client’s needs and my own intuition. Then I can be of service at the highest level possible and participate in the healing process more fully. The more relaxed I am, the more relaxed and trusting my clients are, enabling them to open up faster, go deeper, and speed up their own healing process. Who knew that could all come from me relaxing more?
Janet Hilts

I used to believe that it was possible to heal without experiencing any pain, and if we were intentional about our healing and growth process, we could grow without discomfort. I no longer believe that – instead, I think that discomfort shows us where we need to heal, and gives us opportunities. We can remove discomfort and pain (that’s what healing is all about, both emotional and physical) but we don’t grow if we never experience it.
Pamela Bruner