Tapping Q & A with Gene Monterastelli - Get the most out of tapping and EFT

Pod #5: Why It Is Important To Use EFT On Stress w/ Ron Ball

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It seems like we are living in an ever increasingly stressed world. In this podcast we’ll learn what stress is, the difference between good and bad stress, how it affects the body in the short and long term, and how to use EFT to deal with stress. Stress expert Ron Ball talks about how stress can cause long-term damage and how easy it is to deal with it using EFT in just a few minutes a day.


Ron Ball

Guest: Ron Ball

Contact Info: EFT Zone

Bio: After working for years as a vice president of marketing in the super-stressful world of high technology, Ron Ball set out to find a solution to help busy executives and employees both to relieve stress overload, and to improve their health and wellbeing.

In his quest, he discovered a breakthrough method called EFT. Some people call it tapping or acupuncture with your fingertips instead of needles. Emotional Freedom Techniques is an elegant, simple and powerful method anyone can learn for managing stress, worries, pain, and health issues. In fact, he recommends that people try EFT on everything.

Ron has received both the Basic EFT and Advanced EFT Certificates. He is also publisher of the well-respected blog on EFT, www.EFTzone.com. He is co-author and publisher of the EFT book, Freedom at Your Fingertips: Get Rapid Physical and Emotional Relief with the Breakthrough System of Tapping.

Ron Ball has had an eclectic career, proving you can do whatever you set your mind to. An entrepreneur, Ron is a professional speaker, author, trainer and EFT stress expert. In his work life he’s also been a professional photographer, syndicated radio broadcast interviewer, copywriter, and business executive.
Links & Resources From Episode:

Video: Why It Is Important To Use EFT On Stress w/ Ron Ball

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It seems like we are living in an ever more stressed world. Now we’ll learn what stress is, the difference between good and bad stress, how stress affects the body in the short and long term, and how to use EFT to deal with stress. Stress expert Ron Ball talks about how stress can cause long-term damage and how easy it is to deal with stress in just a few minutes a day.

Guest: Ron Ball

Contact Info: EFT Zone

Bio: After working for years as a vice president of marketing in the super-stress world of high technology, Ron Ball set out to find a solution to help busy executives and employees to both relieve stress overload and improve their health and well being.

In his quest, he discovered a breakthrough method called EFT. Some people call it tapping or acupuncture with your fingertips instead of needles. Emotional Freedom Techniques is an elegant, simple and powerful method anyone can learn for managing stress, worries, pain, and health issues. In fact, he recommends that people try EFT on everything.

Ron has received both the Basic EFT and Advanced EFT Certificates. He is also publisher of the well-respected blog on EFT, www.EFTzone.com. He is co-author and publisher of the EFT book, Freedom at Your Fingertips: Get Rapid Physical and Emotional Relief with the Breakthrough System of Tapping.

Ron Ball has had an eclectic career, proving you can do whatever you set your mind to. An entrepreneur, Ron is a professional speaker, author, trainer and EFT stress expert. In his work life, he’s also been a professional photographer, syndicated radio broadcast interviewer, copywriter, and business executive.
Links & Resrouces From Episode:

Being A Better Parent

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I know EFT can be powerful toll to help my children.  My kids and I tap together every night at bedtime, but I am wondering if there is something more I could do.  I want to be the best parent possible.  Is there a way to us EFT around parenting issues?

[Note: I have asked Deborah Donndelinger to answer this question.  One of Deborah's specialties is working with parents and parenting.  She is a Maryland based EFT practitioner who can be reached @ EFT with Deborah]

The history of parenting is rather brutal, with children once considered non-entities that could be discarded, killed, or used at the parent's whim. Over time, our collective approach to parenting is evolving and developing, which is good news indeed. How we collectively parent is the leading force that shapes how we are as a country and as a world. How we parent as a society determines whether we perpetrate violence or encourage peace.

According to Robin Grille, author of Parenting for A Peaceful World, we are in a shift from the socializing mode of parenting to the helping mode of parenting. The socializing mode of parenting tends to see children as good or bad and the goal is to make them productive members of society. The parent is concerned with raising a child that fits in. He follows the rules and sees himself judged by how well his children do. In the next evolution, called the helping mode, parents are concerned with what the child needs developmentally and choose meeting the child's individual needs above the need to fit in socially. In the helping mode, there is a greater compassion and recognition of children as unique persons on their own path.

As we consider how we personally fit into this parenting journey, we can look at our own history and our current parenting practices with more compassion. EFT fits into this introspection, offering us relief from patterns and reactions. Consider this a Personal Peace Procedure for Parenting.

The myth of the perfect parent, warm and nurturing, is just that, a myth.
Parents are products of their culture and humans have the potential to be the most brutal of the animal kingdom or the most loving. But being human is not a guarantee of parenting well. To move forward in our parenting journey, we first must accept ourselves as we are.

Consider all the times you have been less than pleased with your parenting choices and reactions. Make a list of at least five incidents where you shouted, hit, ignored, or shamed your child. Identify the emotions you were feeling as well as the response and emotions of your child. Tap on these incidents until your intensity gets to zero. Be prepared for some cognitive shifts!

Parenting evolves.
It is perfectly okay that what our parents did for us, or to us, doesn't work for us as parents. Each of us has a mental list, a list from childhood of the things we swore we would never do as parents. Imagine our dismay, when we end up repeating the same exact patterns from our parents. We justify our parental behavior by telling ourselves that we are not so bad, we were treated that way and turned out okay. (Sound familiar?)

Or in an attempt to not be like our parents, we end up on another extreme, just the opposite of our parents. When this happens, it's a very good indication we are still reacting rather than creating how we want to be as a mother or father.

Make a list of at least five times you remember being shamed, punished, felt guilty as a child. How were you disciplined or punished? Were you hit, spanked, isolated, or shamed verbally? How were mealtimes? How were bedtimes? When were you made to feel wrong or less than? These memories are all excellent tapping material.

Parenting truly shapes the world.
As we treat children with respect and love and model being a democracy, we bring democracy to the larger world. And if we model violence and control and fear, we'll bring the same.

Consider all the times you felt fear as a child or used fear to control your children. Consider all the times you experienced violence or used violence to control your child. Pick five incidents and commit to tapping on them until the intensity gets to zero. Be prepared for some amazing cognitive shifts.

If you are reading this, you are already committed to supporting yourself and other parents. As we move towards the next evolution of parenting, we can release our pasts, our histories, and see that our parents did the best they could, even if it wasn't enough. We can heal our wounds and choose how to parent ourselves and our children. There is a growing international community of dedicated focused parents who are using EFT to heal their childhood memories and to become fully the parent they want to be. Welcome to the leading-edge of peaceful parenting.

Losing My Ability To Feel Emotions

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I have been successful with EFT when it comes to working on minor aches and pains. There are some big emotional things from my past I would like to tap on, but I am afraid. I worry that I am going to tap away my ability to feel emotions. Is EFT going to leave me emotionless?

This is a very common question.  Emotional Freedom Techniques (EvEFT/EFT) is a very powerful tool when you want to get relief from very powerful emotions. Many people equate moving from an emotional state to losing the ability to feel emotions at all. This is not the case. If you do EvEFT/EFT you can expect to feel healthy emotions more freely.

It is really important to remember our emotions are not enemies. They exist to help us understand how we feel about the situation we are in. When we feel emotions of joy and bliss it is our inner guidance system telling us that we are very much in tune with ourselves. When we feel emotions of desperation, frustration and anger, our inner guidance system is telling us something is out of alignment and we need to change something.

Therefore, emotions are very good for us, but what we need to do is make sure we are responding to these emotions in a healthy way.

The way we deal with our emotions runs on a spectrum from a) bottling up our emotions and not dealing with them to b) choosing to live in a particular emotion and not moving on. The consequences of these two extremes are usually detrimental.

When we choose not to deal with our emotions and bottle them up they remain a burden that we carry around. They become a block to our system. If this block persists if can often turn into greater problems than unfelt emotions. They can become physical manifestations of dis-ease.

At the other extreme we can choose to keep feeling the emotion over and over again. I am sure you know someone who has not moved past a loss of some sort. Even though the loss (of a loved one, an opportunity, or a relationship) could have happened years ago, the person is still living as if it has just happened. This makes him an emotional prisoner of the past. In this state he is unable to experience what is happening NOW.

We miss a great deal of life when this happens.

What we seek is a middle path in which we recognize our emotions, feel our emotions, learn the lesson our emotions are teaching us, and then let them pass. That is our goal with EvEFT/EFT.

When we use EvEFT/EFT we are going after the emotions that we have bottled up, or we are taking the emotions that we are refusing to let go of, and we are letting them pass naturally. When we do EvEFT/EFT we are not getting rid of our emotions, but we are letting them do exactly what they are made to do.

Here is some tapping patter that will help you if you are having a hard time reconciling with your emotions:

My emotions exists to serve me…they are just one more way my system is communicating with me…I am thankful that my system is trying to lead me by the right path…I am thankful for my emotions because they let me feel the richness of life…I know my emotions are nothing more than information…they are energy that need to do what energy does…and move on…when I tap on my emotions I am making sure I deal with my emotions in a healthy way…I give myself permission to feel the emotions that I have right now…to thank them…to learn from them…and to let them go…if I do this I know I will be on the path to emotional health…allowing me to feel and respond to my emotions in a healthy way in the future. [How to use these tapping phrases]

In podcast #1 Rick Wilkes talk a great deal about the emotions all scale.  He also has created a great resource that lays out the emotional scale.  I would encourage you to check both out.

Pod #4: Dispositions About Healing (from Radio EFT w/ M. Price)

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Have you ever wondered what an Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT/EvEFT) practitioner is thinking during a session and on what basis they decide what to do next? In this interview with Michele Price I give some insight into my thought process and the fundamental principles about healing that guide me. We talk about my 5 of my fundamental dispositions of healing and do some tapping. These are principles that shape the way I understand the world and healing.

Links & Resources From Episode:

Host of Showcasing EFT: Michele Price

Contact Info: Contact: web @ contact, twitter @ twitter.com/prosperitygal

About Radio EFT: This is a tool and modality that can help you in all areas of your life — your personal development, health, business — with ways to gain relief and peace of mind. Michele Price teaches how to improve and generate income. Each week guests on the show will bring their strengths with EFT too, showing you how to apply EFT in their areas of expertise.

Pod #3: What is surrogate tapping and how do I it

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Over the last few months I have received lots of questions about surrogate tapping. In this episode we take a detailed look at surrogate tapping, what it is, theories on why it works, and how to use it.

Show Topic:Getting your head around surrogate tapping with EFT can be difficult (EFT/EvEFT eveft.html). It is hard enough to accept that tapping on the body while tuning into physical and emotional issues can provide relief. It’s a much bigger leap to believe that tapping in the same way on our own body will provide relief for someone else.

In this episode we explore what surrogate tapping is and some theories on why it can be so effective. We also investigate how surrogate tapping can be beneficial for us, even when we think we are working on someone else's issues. Finally we talk about a simple way to add surrogate tapping to your tapping toolset.

Links & Resources From Episode:

  • Tapping On Someone Else's Behavior: There is someone at work who drives me crazy. They are always picking fights and causing lots of disharmony in the office. Changing jobs isn't really an option for me. Is it possible for me to tap to change their behavior? Read more...
  • Surrogate tapping for children with ASD (improvement in both speech and leaky gut): I have heard that EFT has been effective in working with kids with Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD). How can I use EFT with ASD? Read more…
  • Articles at emofree.com on surrogate tapping Read more..
  • Free ebook “Steps to Successful Surrogate Tapping” by Deborah Donndelinger and Karen McLaughlin Download info…
  • Study of entrainment

Host: Gene Monterastelli

Contact Info: web @ eftQandA.com, e-mail @ eftQandA.com/contact, twitter @ twitter.com/genedavid

Bio: Gene Monterastelli is a Baltimore based EFT practitioner. He regularly works with clients in the areas of stress, weight loss, limiting beliefs, anxieties, learning disabilities, pain management, and relationship issues. He is the editor of EFT Q & A. There is a very special place in his practice dedicated to parents of special needs children, especially for parents of children who have diagnosed with Autistic Spectral Disorder (ASD). Gene works with clients from all over the world one-on-one and in groups.

For more information on surrogate tapping:

Free EFT Podcasts and Radio Programs

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Lots of great Emotional Freedom Techniques (EvEFT/EFT) audios are on-line and free. Here are the ones I have listened to and liked. Let me know if I am missing anything.

EFT Q & A Podcast -(Yes, I am biased) These are interviews with some of the brightest minds in change work today and have answers to the most common (and uncommon) questions about EFT.

Showcasing EFT – This is a weekly radio program on BlogTalkRadio about EFT hosted by Michele Price. Every other week Michele is joined by Chip Engelmann and Paul Zelizer to talk all things EFT and abundance with their guests. You can listen live and interact with the host and guest via call in and on-line chat. All past shows are available for download.

EFT Class w/ Eleanore Duyndam – Each week Eleanore and her guests from around the world explore one topic on how to use EFT to improve your life. You can listen live and interact with the host and guest via call in and on-line chat. All past shows are available for download.

EFT Revealed – This site was put together by the folks who created the movie “Try It on Everything.” In January of 2009 they moved to a new site, but this site still has over 100 interviews about EFT and EFT-related topics.

The EFT Experience: Sharing the Art of EFT – Learn first-hand how emotional issues can be transformed to create deep, long-lasting physical and emotional change. It’s hosted by Advanced EFT Coach David “Jade” Barbee, featuring a special guest co-host and live “EFT” coaching sessions every week. All past shows are available for download.

EFT-Talk – These podcasts were done by Rick Wilkes and Carol Look. The last podcast was produced in October of 2008, but there are 25 episodes that you can tap along to.

Attracting Abundance w/ Carol Look – This was a radio program that Carol Look did for Voice America radio for a little more than a year. The last episode was in October of 2006, but all 65 shows can still be downloaded. Most of the episodes are about abundance, but not all of them are.

Parts Of The Body

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photo by Lady Pain

I was on a retreat recently where the retreat director spent a great deal of time talking about how we have become disconnected from our bodies in the modern world. This makes sense, as most of us no longer do work that requires a great amount of physical effort. Even though our lifestyle doesn’t require us to be in close contact with our bodies it doesn’t mean that we should lose that close connection with our bodies.

In addition to being essential to our interactions in the world, our bodies also contain a great deal of information. Injury or disease in the body can be read as a clear sign that our body is trying to share information or a lesson with us.

When I am not working on a specific issue, but instead just looking to the body for lessons and information, there are two ways I approach my body to get information and begin healing. With both techniques I have found myself starting with something small and moving to very profound healing. I call these “scanning the body” and “targeting specific systems and organs”.

Scan the Body
The first step is to simply scan the body through the following steps:

  • Sit up straight some where comfortable
  • Place your feel flat on the floor
  • Place your hands in your lap
  • Don't cross your arms, hands, or feet
  • Close your eyes
  • Take a few nice easy deep breaths

Once you are resting comfortably let your mind’s eye scan your body from head to toe paying attention to any aches, pains, stiffness, or congestion in your energy. As you do this, you will notice certain parts of your body appear most in need of attention.

As you find these places, use your favorite method to tap on them. (Tune into shape, color, weight, intensity, what the ache or pain has to say).

Continue this process as you move from part to part that needs attention.

Targeting Specific Systems and Organs
The second process I like to use with the body is to choose systems or organs of the body and tune into them and tap. This is nothing more complicated than closing your eyes and placing all your attention on your liver (for example). As you pay attention to your liver, simply move from one tapping point to another and then another.

Begin to have an imaginary conversation with your liver. Trust your intuition on this. Ask the liver what is needs and what it wants. Ask it if there is anything you can do for it. Offer it words of thanks and encouragement as you tap. Simply send healing energy to the liver.

As you do this you will be surprised at what comes to mind. When thought, emotions, and memories come up, don’t give them too much attention. Simply feel them and let them pass.

Conclusion
While on retreat Russ Hudson said, “If you are in touch with your body, mind, and spirit then, and only then, are you a candidate for real change.” In our modern world it is very common for us to lose contact with our bodies. If you use either of the exercises listed above, you’ll find yourself more in tune with your body moment to moment, and you will find your way to places of healing very quickly.

Pod #2: Pain Is Not Real w/ Dan Cleary

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In this episode I talk with pain relief expert Dan Cleary. Gained from his own personal experience about chronic pain, Dan has an amazing point of view about how to gain pain relief. In this interview he talks about the “10% solution” that will reshape your understanding of pain, even if you don’t experience chronic pain.

Show Topic:Dan often starts his pain relief classes with the statement “Pain is not real!” This is a dramatic statement, often causing his students to sit up in their seats, ready to disagree. Decades of of personal experience with chronic pain makes him uniquely qualified to talk about the nature of pain. In this interview Dan talks about how pain is nothing more than a signal and how relief is possible. Even though Dan’s expertise is with chronic pain, his point of view of how to achieve relief is useful to all of us.


Dan Cleary

Guest: Dan Cleary

Contact Information: DanClearyHypnosis.com

Bio: Daniel F. Cleary, is an internationally recognized, Pain Relief Educator and Hypnosis Instructor. He provides individual and group programs in Pain Relief, Hypnotic Techniques, and Communication Skills, to Doctors, Psychologists, Therapists and Care Givers, throughout the United States, Europe and Australia,. His specialties include; Pain Relief, Personal Transformation, and Effective Communication. Dan lives in Hobe Sound Florida and is available world wide for phone and Skype sessions.

Links & Resources From Episode:

Video: Using EFT to heal without moving too far too fast w/ Rick Wilkes

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While it is true that there are some issues that can be solved in a very short period of time, most healing happens over a period of time. In this episode, EFT Expert Rick Wilkes and I reveal how we work this healing process without going too far, too fast. We believe that if we move to peak experiences too quickly, they can be followed by an emotional crash — much like the crash that follows a sugar high. Rick artfully shows how we can move up the emotional scale more steadily, insuring that we create a strong emotional foundation that allows us to thrive on a long-term basis.

Guest: Rick Wilkes, LMT

Contact Info: thrivingnow.com, Rick@Thrivingnow.com, 1-304-284-0711 or 1-888-222-3856

Bio: Rick Wilkes is an EFT practitioner based in Morgantown, WV. Over the last six years Rick has worked with over 1500 clients. He works regularly with individuals and with his Thriving Now Groups.

Here's what one of Rick's loyal clients says: “Working with Rick Wilkes both privately and on team calls has helped me greatly to release the past, move more confidently into the future, and mostly to be more joyfully present in the now. Rick’s open-hearted broader perspective, amazing intuition, and great sense of humor always help me to get right to the core and effectively reframe whatever issue I have. Listening to him work with others has helped me to get in touch with stuff I didn’t even know was there and inspired me in my own work with others. It is a blessing and honor to work with such a master.”
Links & Resrouces From Episode:

God’s Love

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[Note: Please note most of the articles at EFT Q & A are written from a very general point of view so they are accessible to the largest audience possible. This article is a little different. The topic came up while e-mailing back and forth with a Christian. The theology contained in the article about God's unconditional love comes from my (limited) understanding of God. I offer it, like everything on this site, as a point of view that is mine and mine alone, not as dogma. If these phrases work for you, great! If they don't, feel free to click away. They are offered as one more possible approach to healing.]

There are times when we feel like we have messed up to the point that not only have we let ourselves down, but we have also let God down. In these times I have found Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT/EvEFT) as a very helpful tool.

I understand God’s love to be unconditional. We don’t earn it, and we can’t lose it. The most difficult times in my own life are the times in which I choose to believe I’m not worthy of or I’m not willing to accept the love God offers.

When I have found it difficult to believe that God still loves me I tap on something like this:

Right now I am having a very hard time…I am struggling…but I choose to know that God loves me no matter what…His love is unconditional…There is nothing I can do to earn his love…Or lose his love…there are times like right now when I don’t believe I deserve God’s love…There are times when I beat myself up because I am letting God down…I choose to know that God wants nothing more than my healing to happen…God wants me to see myself with the same love that he has for me…I give myself permission to know God still loves me…I give myself permission to believe I deserve God’s love, even when I have a hard time loving myself…
[How to use these tapping phrases]

Pod #1: Using EFT to heal without moving too far too fast w/ Rick Wilkes (+ making EFT routine)

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In this episode we answer the question, “How can I make EFT part of my daily routine?” in this interview with Rick Wilkes where he shares how to heal effectively without excessive emotional highs and lows.

Show Topic: While it is true that there are some issues that can be resolved very quickly, most healing happens over a period of time. In this episode EFT expert Rick Wilkes and I reveal how we work this healing process without going too far, too fast. We believe that moving to peak experiences too quickly can result in an emotional crash, much like the crash that follows a sugar high. Rick succinctly explains how we can move up the emotional scale steadily, ensuring that we create a strong emotional foundation to allow us to thrive on a long-term basis. 


Rick Wilkes

Guest: Rick Wilkes, LMT

Contact Info: thrivingnow.com, Rick@Thrivingnow.com, 1-304-284-0711 or 1-888-222-3856

Bio: Rick Wilkes is an EFT practitioner based in Morgantown, WV. Over the last six years Rick has worked with over 1500 clients. He works regularly with individuals and with his Thriving Now Groups.

Here's what one of Rick's loyal clients says: “Working with Rick Wilkes both privately and on team calls has helped me greatly to release the past, move more confidently into the future, and mostly to be more joyfully present in the now. Rick’s open-hearted broader perspective, amazing intuition, and great sense of humor always help me to get right to the core and effectively reframe whatever issue I have. Listening to him work with others has helped me to get in touch with stuff I didn’t even know was there and inspired me in my own work with others. It is a blessing and honor to work with such a master.”

Links & Resources From Episode:

 

 

Sadness

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Sadness can be one of the hardest emotions to use Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT/EvEFT) for. It just doesn’t do it justice to tap on the phrase, “I feel sad.”1

Somehow the word sad doesn’t encompass all that goes along with our feelings because there are many different flavors of sadness.

When I am faced with sadness the first thing I do is tap on the sadness without any words. I close my eyes and simply let the sadness grow in my heart. I am not running from it. I am not running to it. I am just being present to the feeling of the sadness. I feel it and let it pass. The whole time I am just moving from tapping point to tapping point.

The reason we use words when we are tapping is to help us focus in on the issue. Sadness is such a physically visceral emotion that it is very easy to tune into without words. After I have spent a little time tapping without words I will tap on a patter like this:

Right now I feel so sad…sad is such an inadequate word for this emotion…this sadness is cutting me right to my core…as if a part of me is being wrenched out…or slowly burned from the inside out…this sadness is trying to teach me a lesson…it’s worried I am losing or have lost something that is very important…it is afraid I am never going to get it back…it’s afraid that I am going to be without and incomplete…whatever I feel I have lost I am thankful that I did have it in my life…even if it was not for as long as I wanted it…I choose to know I am whole and complete without anything else…I have simply forgotten how I am connected to everything…even when it is not present…I forgive myself for any weakness or failure I feel because I am feeling sad…sadness is natural…it is nothing more than my body’s way of telling me that I fear not being complete…or whole…I am glad there is a part of me that worries about this…I know this sadness will pass…now that I have recognized the lesson this sadness is trying to teach me I thank it and let it pass
[How to use these tapping phrases]

It was like I didn’t have control over my own body!

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I would wake up in the middle of the night and…

walk into the kitchen for a glass of water.

The next thing I knew there was a pile of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups Minis wrappers on the table.

I had no recollection of eating them.

If I licked my teeth I could taste the remnants of what I had just eaten, but I couldn’t even remember enjoying eating them.

This didn't just happen once
At first I thought is was no big deal, a little midnight snack.

Then it started happening night after night.

It was as if I was possessed.

I didn’t feel like I could stop because I couldn’t even remember choosing to do it.

The only choice I had was to get rid of the sweets.

Then I found myself eating other things I didn’t want in the middle of the night.

Getting a Pad Lock
Locking the fridge to keep me out looked like my only option.

BUT then I was introduced to this simple NLP technique.

When I first experienced it I thought, “There is no way that did anything! It’s way too simple. I can’t change my desires just by changing a few images in my mind.”

I am happy to say I was wrong
I can’t believe how wrong I was. I know the power of the mind. I use it all the time in work, but this even blew me away.

Overnight (literally) the midnight eating stopped.

NOT ONLY THAT, but I also found my cravings for Reese’s candy had melted away.

PEAS! PEAS! PEAS!
The technique is so powerful that I tried it on a friend in a busy restaurant on a Friday night (the last place I thought it would work).

She knew that for health reasons she should be eating more peas.

We didn’t even do the full process. Just a shortcut version!

Three days later she sent me an e-mail explaining that she could get enough. Peas went from being disgusting to delicious.

It wasn’t that she could now tolerate something she needed, but she now loved them!

You too can have this transformation in your own home!
I have created a very special audio that helps you to create the exact same transformation in the comfort of your own home any time you want.

The full process is done in two parts.

FIRST, it will take the foods you don’t want your body to crave any more and move them from being uncontrollably desirable to you having no need for them.

SECOND, it will take the foods you do want to eat more of and make the first thing that comes to mind when you ask the question, “What do I want to eat?”

Do it over and over again
The best part is, this is an audio you can listen to again and again. As you encounter new foods you want to add or remove form your desires you can just listen to the audio again.

When I do this process just once with clients it takes 15 to 20 minutes, which is a third of a full session. That means my clients pay close to $30 to just do the process once.

With this audio you can do the process as many times as you want for one third of the price of working with me one-on-one just once.

Money Back Guarantee
If this does not completely eliminate the desires you have for the food you don’t want, just let me know and I will give you a full refund. That is how much I believe in this audio!

Price: $13.77 $9.95


Act now!

PS: Image what it is going to be like to want and love the foods that are good for you!

Not Knowing What To Tap On

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There are times when we know Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT/EvEFT), but we don’t know where to begin. We are either faced with so many issues our mind jumps from one issue to another, or we have so much going on that we can’t seem to get a grip on any one issue.

Almost every EFT/EvEFT resource instructs you to be as specific as possible. (This web site even does it in the basic introduction to EFT.) But sometimes this is just not possible, and then it is okay to deal with everything all at once just to make a little headway and to get some clarity.

The process is very simple. Tune into all the emotions at once as a giant constellation of emotions. Don’t worry about whether you can pull any particular piece off. Tap on a patter like this:

I know EFT is a very powerful tool…I believe it can help me…but right now I am having a very hard time…I can’t quite figure out what I need to tap on…I either can’t find one issue because there is so much…or there is so much that I just jump from issue to issue, never spending enough time on one issue to make a difference…I give myself permission to be easy with myself in this process…I give myself permission to know that I don’t need to do everything today…there is a part of all of this that is most important…I give myself permission to tune into my natural intuition to find the issues I need to be working on right now…I let all the other issues just pass away…like evaporating mist in the morning…I know I have lessons to learn from those issues as well…but I can deal with those another time…I let my natural resources of focus and intuition take me to and keep me on the issues I need to be working on…even if I never land on the issue I need to be working on…the fact that I have taken time to get a few deep breaths and to tap a little will serve me…I know by just taking this moment I am healing in a small way…even if I am not knocking out the issues I want to deal with.
[How to use these tapping phrases]

When Our Change Affects Others

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I love EFT and use it a lot. It’s been very helpful with small emotional issues and simple physical pains. But when it comes to bigger issues I have a concern. I’m afraid that if I change the person I am I will hurt the people I love. Do you have any advice?

Change of any sort can be scary. We can fear that we are not going to be able to manage the new situation, we can fear not knowing how to be in the new situation, and we can fear that others are going to be disappointed with us.

I see this quite often with my weight loss clients. Many have shared thoughts like:

  • “My fat friends aren't going to like me if I am thin.”
  • “If I loose weight my fat friends are going to think that I think I am too good for them.”
  • “If I loose weight I am going to make my friends who can't loose weight feel bad.”

It’s not a bad thing to think about how others are going to respond to our actions. This is rooted in our love for them. We don’t want to do things that will complicate the lives of our loved ones. BUT this can’t be the only thing we take into consideration when we a making a choice or a change.

The weight loss example above demonstrates this perfectly. It would be really nice if losing weight didn’t make our friends feel self-conscious, but our health is more important — giving use a chance to live a longer, more active life — than how our friends might feel.

From the outside this is very obvious, but when it comes to making these choices in our own lives it becomes very difficult for a number of reasons.

  • We don't want to make someone else feel bad
  • We feel selfish by choosing our needs over others
  • We fear that if we makes someone else's life harder they are going to leave
  • We don't deserve to make our life better at someone else expense.

These are all very real and powerful feelings that make it very hard to choose what’s best for us.

It is very important to recognize that not only do we deserve to take care of ourselves (making positive change of all types), but also we must recognize that these changes will benefit our loved ones, too. When we are healthy emotionally and physically it is easier for us to care for them.

When I bump into the issue of not wanting to change, I tap using phrases like these:

I would like to make a change in my life…but I know my life is tied to so many other people’s lives…if I change my life I am going to change others people’s lives as well…I worry about doing this…I don’t want to make anyone else’s life harder…especially if it is because of the choices I am making…I feel bad when I make others’ lives harder…or when I make them self-conscious about their own lives…many times I would rather carry my burden than pass a burden on to someone else…also, I feel very selfish for doing this…what right do I have to make my life better by making other people’s lives harder….I already have too much….who do I think I am that I deserve more…

I choose to know that I should be able to take care of myself…I deserve to make my life better…I know that even though I have it better than others…I deserve more…I am thankful for what I have…but that doesn’t mean that I should stop growing and changing…Many times when people feel bad about my change it’s because they are jealous of the work I’m doing…they are taking their feelings out on me for the change that they are not willing to make…if nothing else I can be a model for them of what change can be like…

When I make a change to myself I am not choosing myself over someone else…I am not choosing to make my life better at someone else’s expense…I am choosing to be better…I deserve better even if others aren’t going to make that choice for themselves…the fact that I worry about how this affects others means I am a loving person…but my choosing to change myself doesn’t mean I’m being selfish…I am not showing that I don’t love others…

I need to understand it is not an either/or situation…it is not that I can be better OR they can be happy…I can change, and they can be happy…It is not my job only to take care of everyone else’s needs…my needs are important too…I can change my life…and it might affect others….but I need to know my needs are important too…others don’t ask for my permission when they change…I don’t have to ask permission from others to change…

I need to make changes in my life…we all need to grow and change…when I make changes it is going to impact the lives of others …but I am not going to let this stop my healing…and growing…I deserve change…I need change
[How to use these tapping phrases]

I would recommend tapping on something like this before every tapping session to insure that you are doing the work that you really want and need to do.

Feeling Like You Are Backsliding

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Often when we do change work we feel like the deeper we dig into an issue the worse it gets. It is almost as if we stir up issues that weren’t there before. This can be frustrating and overwhelming.

We might ask, “If all I do is make this worse, why am I bothering? It’s not worth it! I give up!”

Even though we feel like we are not making progress, in reality we are. It just appears we are backsliding. Here is an analogy I like to use with my clients.

I grew up in Wyoming (one of the western states of the USA). Wyoming is filled with wide-open spaces. There are places in the state where you can see for well over 100 miles. Because you have no point of reference — like man-made structures — it is difficult to know how far you are from something or how big it is. This can create some interesting misperceptions.

For example, you could believe that the mountain that you are looking at is just on the other side of this hill. Once you get to the top of the hill you realize that there are really seven more hills before you get to the mountain. Because you can’t tell how big the mountain is you have no real sense of how far away it is. As you gain a greater perspective of the landscape, you gain a better sense of where you are in relationship to the mountain.

Even though you are moving forward, it feels like the mountain has moved further away because your perception of the mountain’s location has changed.

The same thing can happen when we are working on emotional issues. As we do work on the emotional issue we realize how big it really is (often much bigger than we thought it was in the first place).

As we come to these insights we ARE healing. We ARE moving closer to our goal. We’ve gained a new perspective of the issue at hand. Still, we can feel frustrated at the illusion of having lost ground. Evolving Emotional Freedom Techniques (EvEFT/EFT) can take the edge off the feeling of backsliding to allow us to deal with the issues at hand.

Here is some tapping patter you could use with this issue:

It feels like I am backsliding…every time I do some tapping it feels like it is getting worse…I keep finding more issues than I fix…it is very frustrating…if it is going to be like this I want to quit…why do I want to make things worse…but I choose to know that I really am making progress…not only am I clearing out emotional issues…I am getting a better understanding of what I’m dealing with…this isn’t fun because I’m finding things I didn’t know were there…but by finding these things I now know the areas of my self and my life that can use healing…even though it feels like I am losing ground I know I am gaining ground…with each step forward…no matter how small…I am getting closer to where I want to be…the goal has not moved…it is in the same place…I just have a clearer vision of what that goal is…making it easier for me to get there
[How to use these tapping phrases]

Journaling

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photo by Luigi Anzivino

A number of studies have indicated that the simple act of writing down what we are thinking and worrying about takes some of the charge out of the emotions. Dragging the thoughts into the light of day helps us to see what we are overreacting to and what is truly going on.

When we leave our thoughts alone in our head they have a tendency to be magnified. The mind serves as an echo chamber (especially in the middle of the night). Each time a thought or worry is bounced around it get stronger and stronger. We can combine Evolving Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT/EvEFT) with a simple task to take the charge out of our thoughts and feelings.

TYou simply set some time aside to write down everything that is bouncing around in your mind. Take the self-talk that is in your head and just let it flow. You don’t need any special journal to do this. You can even type it on the computer.

After you have done this you don’t have to save your writing. You can throw it away or just erase the computer file. The important task is to get it out of your head where it tends to be amplified.

I like to add EFT to this activity to continue to clean up the emotional charge. I do this is by opening a blank document on my computer and just letting my fingers go. I type as fast as the thoughts come to me. As this happens I start to see the things I am overreacting to, which takes some of the charge away.

After I finish typing I go back and re-read everything I have just written, tapping from point to point as I read. The emotions that have not been completely cleared out rise again while I read my own words. By tapping while reading my thought processes, I clear out even more of the emotional charge.

For the areas that have a great deal of emotional charge I read the passage two or three times while tapping.

In the process I tune in to the problem without worrying about exactly the right words to say because I’ve already produced them.

When I am done tapping I delete the file.

Our Emotions Are Illogical And Make No Sense

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Sometimes the healing process is hampered by our logical mind. We get to the point where we can name our issues, but they make no sense at all. We can logically see how things are different from what our emotions believe. This can be a very difficult point in the healing process because we realize that we can’t talk ourselves out of misguided or wrong emotional beliefs. Because we can’t logic our way out of something, we don’t know where to turn and can feel helpless in the healing process.

I am sure I drive my clients crazy be telling them over and over again, “Just because it isn’t true doesn’t mean that it isn’t real.” When we encounter these emotions that are based in ridiculous notions it is important that we acknowledge this fact.

I love the fact that Gary Craig (http://emofree.com) has always described these as the comedies of our mind. They are comedies because once they are dragged out into the light of day we can see how ridiculous they are.

But, just because they are ridiculous to us logically doesn’t mean that they aren’t still very powerful. It’s frequently helpful to allow ourselves to be comfortable with the fact that these beliefs make no sense at all.

By using Evolving Emotional Freedom Techniques (EvEFT/EFT) on the fact that our emotional beliefs exist to protect us, we gain peace and clarity about how best to take care of ourselves. When we are easy about this fact it allows us to do the healing work we want to do without the frustration of it making no sense.

The tapping patter could look like this:

These thoughts and feelings make no sense at all…logically I can clearly see how my emotions are misinterpreting the situation, myself, and the world…I know these emotions and beliefs exist because there is a part of me that is trying to take care of me…this part of me is working very hard to make sure I stay safe and whole…it just happens to be doing it in a way that is not good for me in the short or long term…I am thankful that there are parts of me willing to do whatever they can to protect me…I affirm the work of this part of me…I don’t want to fight with this illogical part of myself…because we have the same goal…getting me to heal…I now ask this part to work with me in a more effective way to help my healing…I know from time to time that I have illogical emotional thoughts…because emotions are illogical by their very nature…I give myself permission to be easy with myself as I heal these illogical thoughts and emotions.
[How to use these tapping phrases]

One Issue That Is Really Three or Four Issues

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I am dealing with homework issues and tantrums with my 8 year-old daughter. Parenting her really takes all my energy. It seems I spend more time battling with her than enjoying her. How can I approach this issue?


photo by Kathryn Rotondo

Sometimes when we face a situation it looks like one issue, because it is one situation, but in reality it’s more than one issue. At first it might seem daunting to break the issue down into smaller parts because it appears to require more work, but I have found it helpful to break the situation down into smaller, more manageable parts.

Evolving Emotional Freedom Techniques (EvEFT/EFT) is even more powerful when we are dealing with small partsbecause we see progress faster, and that progress encourages us to do more.

Here is a very simple way to break down a problem into smaller issues. I will use the example in the question to demonstrate each part.

What in the situation is worthy of giving thanks for?
I love starting from a point of view of gratitude. Often when we are dealing with what we don’t like in a situation we forget all of the blessings that are present.

In this case the question clearly states the parent actively wants to appreciate the daughter. So the first thing I would do is tap on all the wonderful things about the daughter and spending time with the daughter:

I am really blessed to have such a wonderful daughter…she has so much spirit…I know the time we have together is short…she will be grown up before I know it…with that in mind I am going to savor each moment I have with her…even those moments of struggle are a blessing…because we get to share them together…I give myself permission to enjoy this moment and my daughter…even in the middle of this struggle…I am lucky and blessed to have my daughter

Simply naming the good in a situation lessens the emotional charge and gives us a clearer vision of what the root issue(s) is.

What are the emotions I am dealing with?
The second step is to consider, and list, all of the emotions you are feeling. In this case the list might look like:

  • Frustrated she is not doing what she needs to do
  • Tired of all the battling
  • Wanting to do fun stuff with my daughter
  • Wishing I was doing something else I enjoyed

And the list could go on
After you have created the list, ask why you feel that way. This will give you insight on what to tap on. Take each emotion one at a time and tap on them. Don’t be surprised that as you clear one emotion you clear the others as well.

Are there other actors in the situation that I could surrogately tap for?
The last step is to look at the other actors in the situation. Are there issues you could tap on for them? In this case the daughter is obviously resisting doing the homework. As a parent you would have special insight into why she might be resisting. She could be fearing failure, just being 8 and wanting to do something else, not enjoying it because she is not very good at it, or is worried she is going to fail and let you down.

Just take a deep breath and tune into the other actors. Guess why they are having such a hard time in the situation. You don’t need the special connection of a parent and child to do this. When we put aside our own emotional baggage about a situation it’s easy to guess what others are struggling with.

Once you have a guess about what the other person is struggling with, you can spend some time tapping on those issues for them. This will do two things. First, it will give you perspective on what they are going through. This might change your understanding of the situation, clearing some of your emotional charge. Second, it might make a difference in their life, the way surrogate tapping has been reported to make changes for others.

The Process
The steps aren’t very complicated. When you are facing a big problem break it down into three chucks.

  • What can I be thankful for?
  • What am I struggling with?
  • What might they be struggling with?

By doing this we will resolve the issues in smaller and more manageable pieces.