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Pod #212: EFT To Help You Be A Better Parent w/ Heather Chauvin

March 16, 2016 By Gene Monterastelli Leave a Comment

eft for parenting

I am constantly amazed at how willing parents are to put their children first. It’s common for parents to make sure their child’s needs are met before they do anything for themselves. As well meaning as this is, it can cause problems in the long term.

By always putting their family first and not taking care of themselves parents can find themselves unable to be the best parent they could be. One of the most important ways that parents can take care of their children is to make sure they also take care of themselves.

This week I interview Heather Chauvin about how parents can use tapping to be better parents.


Heather Chauvin

Guest: Heather Chauvin

Contact: web @: http://heatherchauvin.com; podcast @ Mom’s In Control; Free Gift @ 21 Day Mom Is In Control Challenge

About Heather: Heather Chauvin has been named the next generation’s thought leader in parenting and women’s leadership. Her mission is to crack women open to their deepest potential and lead the life their soul craves. She reaches thousands of readers worldwide and leads innovative retreats and coaching programs that teach women to succeed in their most sacred work in parenting and business. Heather’s the creator of the New & Noteworthy Podcast, Mom Is In Control and has been featured on the OWN network, Huffington Post, TV outlets and others. Through her Courageous Rewrite Initiative, Heather has given voice to many humans who have courageously taking inspired action towards creating a life they’re proud of.

With wit and wisdom, Heather inspires a global community of women to take back control of how they want to lead, work, play and parent.

Filed Under: Podcast Tagged With: Children, Heather Chauvin, Kids, Parent

Pod #211: EFT For The Fear Of Letting Others Down

March 9, 2016 By Gene Monterastelli 2 Comments

EFT For The Fear Of Letting Others Down

There is a very primitive part of our nature that knows we are safest when we belong. This instinct was a key to survival for our nomadic ancient ancestors who sought safety in numbers at times of danger.

While we no longer have to worry about being attacked by large animals, humans still have a strong instinct that tells us belonging means safety. This is one of the reasons it can feel so devastating when we let someone else down.

In addition to not living up to our work or their expectations, letting down others triggers the fear of ostracisation and we feel unsafe as a result. Even if this is far from the reality of a situation, it is often how we respond emotionally.

This week we tap for the fear of letting others down. Even if you can’t think of a specific example in your life right now, it is likely that this issue is lurking below the surface. Take a few moments to tap along.

Filed Under: Podcast Tagged With: Friends, Let Down, Loved Ones, Worry

The Best Resource I Have Ever Created (PLEASE READ!)

March 5, 2016 By Gene Monterastelli Leave a Comment

Cover3D

Good morning,

As you may know, for two years I was lucky enough to teach tapping as part of an advanced anger management class in a county jail.

Yes!

I had guys in prison jumpsuits tapping along with me and really liking it.

I quickly realized that a number of inmates would never make it to my classes because of other obligations, such as studying for their high school diploma or working through a rehab program.

So I wrote a book containing all the tools I taught in class to make this powerful and transformative emotional work possible for them, despite not being able to attend the class.

It’s Not An Anger Management Book
One day in class I had the guys writing answers to some questions be used with the next tool I planned to teach them.

One of the guys stopped and looked up at me. He said, “Mr. Gene this isn’t an anger management class. This is an emotion class.” He paused for a second or two and then said, “And I’m OK with that,” and returned to his work.

He was right. I only framed the class as an anger management class because I knew that it would appeal to a lot of the inmates. Many of the men I met in jail were there as a direct result of their inability to control their anger. None of them would have been looking for an “emotions class”.

Once I had them on board with the approach and gained their trust, we could spend time on the deeper issues that were showing up as anger.

So this book is not an anger book, despite its title. It is about responding to all emotions in a healthy and proportional way.

The Best Resource I Have Ever Produced
Of all of the tools I have created, I believe this the best one! The comprehensive tools it teaches are presented in a straightforward, user-friendly, step-by-step fashion.

In the last week I have sent pdf copies of it to five of my clients. I told them, “I think that you’d find this tool in my anger book really useful. Let me send you a copy of it.”

I want you to have a copy of it too!

You Can Have A Copy Free Of Charge
I believe in the power of the tools in this book and I’d love everyone to be using them so I have set up a ‘name your own price’ deal for the pdf version of the book.

Which means that if you want a free pdf copy you can have one.

All of the proceeds from the book sales go towards supplying copies of the books to inmates. Each one costs me about $3.20 to print and send to an inmate. So if you do decide to buy it you will know exactly how many men and women you will be helping.

If you don’t want a pdf version the book you can also purchase a Kindle or paperback version. (Unfortunately, I can’t do name your own price for those two versions.)

I Will Match Your Contribution
In addition to all proceeds of the sales going buying more books I am going to match all sales in March and April with an equal donation to Kiva.

Kiva is an organization that makes micro loans to help people move from poverty to being able to take control of their circumstances. Socio-economic factors are a key contributor behind why people commit crime.

This way we are helping people who have made poor choices and helping people in desperate need avoid having to turn to crime.

You can access the book here:

Paperback for $19.95

Kindle Version for $9.95

Name your own price and download a PDF version. (And, yes, you can make that price $0!)

NOTE About Matching Donations: Kiva is an organization that makes micro loans to help people move from poverty to being able to take control of their circumstances. Socio-economic factors are a key contributor behind why people commit crime.

This way we are helping people who have made poor choices and helping people in desperate need avoid having to turn to crime.

I Am Serious About The Book Being Free
I don’t want you to feel like I am laying a guilt trip on you. If right now you can’t afford to buy the book then please, please, please download it free.

It contains powerful information and I want you to have it.

PS: The shopping cart for the pdf will default to $10, which is the Kindle price, but you can change to less (even 0) or more, if you are so inclined. Get it here:

  • Paperback for $19.95
  • Kindle Version for $9.95
  • Name your own price and download a PDF version.

Filed Under: Notes

Pod #210: Systems For Healing w/ Deborah Donndelinger

March 2, 2016 By Gene Monterastelli 1 Comment

Systems for healingWe all know that the more specific we can be when tapping, the more effective it will be. As a concept this is easy to understand, but in practice it is much harder to implement.

Humans are complicated creatures. We can talk about the difference between our mind, body, and spirit, but the lines between these three are blurry. As a simple example, the thoughts in my mind can impact my physical body.

To help manage the complicated system that we are, employing a healing framework as a lens to facilitate the healing process can be helpful. This week I have a conversation with Deborah Donndelinger about three such systems to help us find our way to root causes.

Deborah compares and contrasts the three, shares how to use each, and which might be most useful for you based on the issues you are tapping for.


Deborah Donndelinger

Guest: Deborah Donndelinger

Contact: email @ deb@eftwithdeborah.com; web @
DeborahDonndelinger.com; facebook @ EFTwithDeb; phone @ 410-861-0333

About Deborah: Deborah is an EFT practitioner and personal development coach living in central Maryland. She works with clients, near and far, using tapping, human design, and other tools as they journey from self-judgement and doubt to trusting and understanding themselves. She’s the creator and author of the book Family Energetics.

Filed Under: Podcast Tagged With: Deborah Donndelinger, Enneagram, System of Healing

Pod #209: EFT For Election Season’s Negative Emotions w/ Brad Yates

February 24, 2016 By Gene Monterastelli Leave a Comment

EFT For Election Season's Negative Emotions

Here in the United States it already feels as if the Presidential election campaign has been going on for way too long. And we still have eight more months to go. The lead story (and often the first five stories) on the nightly news is invariably about the election.

One of the most difficult parts of the election season is hearing most of the candidates talking about how bad everything is. They focus on negativity so that they can talk about how great they are and how they are the key to a brighter future. This sustained daily dose of negativity can take an emotional toll.

This week I chat with Brad Yates about how we can participate in the process fully without being overwhelmed by the negativity.

I have a feeling this is an interview you will come back to a number of times throughout the election season.


Brad Yates

Guest: Brad Yates

Contact: twitter @EFTWizard; web @ TapWithBrad.com; facebook @ facebook.com/BradYatesTapping

About Brad: Brad has had the privilege and pleasure of working with a diverse group of clients, from CEOs to professional and NCAA athletes, from chiropractors and psychiatrists to corporate and federal attorneys, from award-winning actors to residents at a program for homeless men and women in Santa Monica. For several years he taught a weekly class using EFT and guided imagery at Sacramento Drug Court. He has also been a presenter at a number of events, including several International Energy Psychology Conferences and the Walk On Water (WOW) Fest in Los Angeles. He has presented at Jack Canfield’s Breakthrough to Success event, and has done teleseminars with “The Secret” stars Bob Doyle and Dr. Joe Vitale. He is also the co-author of the best-seller “Freedom at Your Fingertips,” a featured expert in the film “Try It On Everything” (along with Jack Canfield, Bob Proctor, Dr. Norman Shealy and Dr. Bruce Lipton), and has been heard internationally on a number of internet radio talk shows.

Filed Under: Podcast Tagged With: Brad Yates, Media, Stress, Voting

Pod #208: EFT For Emotional First Aid w/ Jondi Whitis

February 17, 2016 By Gene Monterastelli 1 Comment

EmotionalFirstAid

One of the reasons that we love tapping so much is its versatility. Because we can use tapping in so many different settings it can often be confusing to know exactly how to tap in a given moment.

For example, there is a huge difference between tapping with someone who is emotional in a public setting versus working with a client one-on-one in the safety of a practitioner’s private office.

Our primary goal when tapping with someone in a public setting or when we have limited time to deal with an issue is to return the person we are working with to a state of calm. By doing this we can keep them safe and also avoid uncovering a bigger issue that can’t be resolved in the moment.

Jondi Whitis has created a wonderful process, which she refers to as emotional first aid, which is a systematic way of helping someone to an emotionally safe space in public or in a short amount of time.

In this week’s podcast she shares how the process came about and how you can ensure that you are tapping with others in a safe way.


Jondi Whitis

Conversation with: Jondi Whitis

Jondi’s Contact: web @ EFT4Results.com;

About Jondi: Jondi Whitis is a certified EFT Master Trainer, Practitioner, Mentor and Board Member for AAMET International, delighting in creating practitioners of excellence. She’s passionately interested in refining and up-levelling core EFT skillsets, cutting-edge techniques, and training for practitioners and trainers worldwide, upholding the most thorough and professional EFT standards. She offers deeply personal, hands-on training to anyone interested in heart-centered healing, from children to teachers, parents to professionals, and for diverse communities worldwide, including veterans, Native Americans, teachers, healthcare professionals, and those who work with kids.

An ‘integration specialist’, Jondi enthusiastically guides each person to find authentic ways to integrate EFT into their purpose, professional practice and life. Join her in person, at the annual gathering just north of NYC, Spring Energy Event

Filed Under: Podcast Tagged With: Emotions, First Aid, Jondi Whitis

Pod #207: EFT For Acute And Chronic Pain w/ Dan Cleary

February 10, 2016 By Gene Monterastelli 1 Comment

EFT For Acute And Chronic PainNot all physical pain is the same. Pain can have many different root causes, ranging from physical wounds to emotional issues. Some pain passes as the body heals, while other pain is chronic.

In this week’s podcast I talk to Dan Cleary who damaged his arm in a serious motorcycle accident decades ago. To this day he continues to experience considerable nerve pain as a result of the accident.

Because of this experience he is dedicated to working with people experiencing pain. In this interview we talk about why he never uses the term “pain management”, the types of pain (chronic and acute), and how to approach each with tapping.


Dan Cleary

Guest: Dan Cleary

Contact Information: DanClearyHypnosis.com

Bio: Daniel F. Cleary, is an internationally recognized, Pain Relief Educator and Hypnosis Instructor. He provides individual and group programs in Pain Relief, Hypnotic Techniques, and Communication Skills, to Doctors, Psychologists, Therapists and Caregivers, throughout the United States, Europe and Australia,. His specialties include; Pain Relief, Personal Transformation, and Effective Communication. Dan lives in Hobe Sound, Florida and is available worldwide for phone and Skype sessions.

Filed Under: Podcast Tagged With: Dan Cleary, Pain, Physical Response

Pod #206: EFT For Allergies w/ Sandi Radomski

February 3, 2016 By Gene Monterastelli Leave a Comment

EFT ForAllergy

Good communication is hard. It is easy to be misunderstood because we all understand specific words in different ways. I can say one thing and yet you may understand something completely different.

More than likely when you think of allergies you imagine a runny nose because of flower pollen, or someone having a dangerous reaction to eating nuts or shellfish.

For this week’s podcast we are using a much broader definition of allergy. In this context we are talking about how when we encounter one substance it reminds us on a subconscious level of something negative. This is a subtle concept, but one that I have found to be important to health and healing.

To talk about this concept I turned to Sandi Radomski as it was her work that originally introduced me to this idea and informs my own work with kids who have been diagnosed as being on the autism spectrum.

In the interview we discuss a new way to look at the term ‘allergy’ and how you can approach allergies with tapping.

We talk about muscle testing in the interview. This is the resource I used to learn how to muscle test:
Muscle Testing Vol 1 DVD and Muscle Testing Vol 1 – 4 digital download

The workbooks that I used (and still reference regularly) can be found on Sandy’s website


Sandi Radomski

Guest: Sandi Radomski

Contact: web @ AllergyAntidotes.com

About: Sandi Radomski wears many professional hats. She is board certified in social work, she is a psychotherapist, and she is a naturopathic doctor. Her background includes teaching in the University of Wisconsin medical school for eight years, doing biofeedback with pain patients for ten years, conducting research in psychoneuroimmunology to benefit children with cancer, and private practice.

Dr. Radomski has combined her medical background and her extensive training in Energy Psychology to create her Allergy Antidotes system for identifying and treating sensitivity reactions. She uses these techniques to treat autism, weight loss, learning and behavioral problems, anxiety, and depression. She was the first to use the Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) to balance the body’s energy system in relation to a reactive substance.

Sandi is a national as well as international lecturer and trainer. Recognizing her significant body of work, Dr. Radomski received the “Award of Recognition from the Association for Comprehensive Energy Psychology (ACEP) for her major contribution to the field of energy psychology” in 2015. Sandi is available for private sessions either by telephone or on Skype.

Filed Under: Podcast Tagged With: Allergies, Sandi Radomski

Pod #205: EFT For Being Who We Aspire To Be

January 27, 2016 By Gene Monterastelli 5 Comments

NotreDame

In podcast #204 I showed you a straightforward technique that you can use to tune into the emotional states that you would like to have as you move through the day.

This week’s podcast is something I use to help me to tune into the type of person I would like to be. The script I have used is very personal and is inspired by my Catholic faith so I don’t expect it to be helpful for everyone.

If it works for you, great!

If changing the language makes it work for you, great!

If it doesn’t work for you at all, not to worry! Come back next week for something else that might be helpful.

The tapping script can be found below or you can download the pdf.

Filed Under: Podcast

Dirty Rotten Marketing Trick (AKA Last Chance)

January 25, 2016 By Gene Monterastelli Leave a Comment

Fail

Good morning,

In addition to this newsletter, I also have a mailing list which teaches people how to run and grow small businesses.

A few weeks ago I sent an email with the subject line “Why I Love January 5th!”

The email went on to explain that, as a person who helps people reach their goals, one of the reasons I love January 5th is because that is the day when most people give up on their New Year’s resolutions.

I don’t love the fact that people have failed at their goals.

Instead, I love the fact that it is an opportunity to have an honest conversation with people like you about what really needs to happen for change to occur in our lives.

Coming up with a to-do list of new habits to start the year at 11:48pm on New Year’s Eve is not the best path to change. Something more is needed.

So it might seem like a dirty rotten marketing trick when I pointed out the fact that you failed at your New Year’s resolutions in order to sell you something.

But that is not the case!

Now that you have seen your resolutions are not enough to make real change, I want you to consider how real change happens.

Below is the story of how real change happened in my life (and the 3 key elements to making change happen).

If you don’t do the program I am offering, I encourage you to use the story below as a guide to making changes in your life.

I want to support you in your transformation because I know how hard it can be to do on your own.

There are only a total of 8 spaces in this program to ensure I am giving everyone the support they need.

Look at the details below and let me know if you’d like to have a conversation to see if this is the right fit for you.

Have a great Monday,

Gene

PS: If you are ready to have a conversation to see if this is right for you, just let me know here: https://tappingqanda.com/?p=10897


The Cost Of Looking Fear In The Eye

Last year I spent some time trying to figure out what my next venture would be.

Working on a new project that calls on my creativity feeds my soul.

The project I was considering was a new podcast called “Facing Fear”. My plan was to record a weekly podcast where I would explore one of my deepest, darkest fears.

I’m talking about the kind of fears that would have me tossing and turning for hours in the middle of the night.

Fears like:

  • There is nothing exceptional about me.
  • I’m 42. Since I haven’t found anyone to love me yet, I never will, and will die alone.
  • I spend too much time worrying about my own crap and my loved ones don’t know that I care about them.
  • I am just filling my life with tasks so as to avoid facing my loneliness.
  • At my core I am really a selfish person. I worry more about replacing my computer than I do about the real suffering in the world.

I know. It’s upbeat stuff. My heart aches a little just in typing that list.

Each morning I set aside a little time to work on the project.

My list grew and grew as I tried to find the ten “best” fears for the first set of shows. I started outlining short essays about each fear and what I believed to be the root cause.

I found myself practicing the wording about the fears for the recordings while I was in the shower or on my exercise bike.

Then something really unexpected happened…

One afternoon I went to get a glass of water and there were no glasses in my cupboard.

A Pile Of Dishes In The Sink And No Clean Bowls Or Glasses

I know that an empty cupboard isn’t really such an odd thing but let’s consider a few facts.

  • I live alone.
  • I have at least a dozen glasses.
  • When I am looking for an excuse to be busy and feel productive I do dishes.

That last point is the important one.

Whenever I am trying to avoid my worries about things that feel dangerous or overwhelming I head straight to my kitchen and clean.

In that moment I noticed that my counter and sink were cluttered with dishes. Almost every dish I owned was visible and dirty.

And the reason was because I was so busy doing more important tasks that I wasn’t feeling the negative emotions about those tasks.

By thinking about this new podcast I was facing my fears head on and healing them.

I have never been so happy to see a pile of dirty dishes in my life!

It Wasn’t Just Clearing Core Issues. There Was Another Key Factor

I need to be clear it wasn’t just a matter of facing my fears. Three key factors created the change:

  1. I named my fears fully and honestly.
  2. I thought about the root causes of those fears in a systematic way.
  3. I was working towards a clear set of goals.

Wallowing in my fears would not have been helpful. That can become self-indulgent and unhealthy.

Taking the time to uproot the fears meant that I was healing and feeling better BUT real transformation only happened because I had a clearly-defined list of goals and I was able to step into action.

The Right Number Of Goals

I think there was also a secondary factor that contributed to my success in taking action: I had the right number of goals.

There have been times in my life where I have had a full page of detailed goals. Goals for my personal life, my physical health, my spiritual growth, and my business.

It’s great to have that sort of clarity, but in truth I have found it difficult to commit to working towards so many goals.

Around the time I started working on the fear project I had pared down my list of goals to just three.

I wasn’t saying that my life was perfect or that I only needed to work on three goals but by focusing on just three I was able to give each one the attention required to make real progress. I had learned that spreading myself too thinly meant that I wasn’t moving forward with anything.

You Can Do This Too!

I want you to have the opportunity to experience what I did.

I want you to have the opportunity to find and clear the core issues holding you back. I want you to have a clear idea of what you want AND I want to support you so you don’t have to figure this out on your own.

In the past I have offered 8-month programs which have been more geared toward business owners.

This winter I am offering a 4-month program focused on transformation in your daily life.

This program will help you to get clear about what you want, uncover what is holding you back, and guide you as you clear those issues systematically.

Here Is What The Program Includes:

This will be in the format of a 3-hour phone or Skype call, which will be recorded. (Yes, we will take breaks as needed.) At the end of the call we will have a clear plan with well-framed goals and benchmarks to measure your progress along the way. (Assessments, planning sessions, tap-along audio, clearly articulated goals, and plan – $1000 value)

[Note: We don’t have to do this as a call. You are welcome to come to NYC and we can do this work together in person. I will even buy you lunch!]

After each call you will receive an audio recording of the session so that you can return to the tapping we did AND you will be given a tapping code that you can do twice a day to help you to continue clearing the issues covered during the session.

  • Goal, Asset, and Obstacle Assessment – Before we can begin we need to know where you are right now in your life. This assessment is designed to help us gain a clear picture of the obstacles you face and your unaccessed assets to allow you to reach your goals (even if you aren’t quite sure what they are right now).

  • Core Issue Assessment – Most of my clients have one or two core issues holding them back in many areas of their life. This assessment will help us to zero in on those core issues to guide our work.

  • Assessment Prep Tap-Along Audio – Starting a process like this can feel a little scary. You might be worried that we will uncover something awful or that you will do the assessment wrong. There are no right or wrong answers in these assessments but to make it easier for you I have created a tap-along audio to help you to feel comfortable and safe as you go through the process.

  • Kick Start Planning Call And Long Term Plan – After you have completed the assessments and I have had the chance to study them we will create your personal plan. During this call we’ll define your focus for the program in the form of three goals. We will also find clarity on which core issues we will target head on.

  • 14 Weekly 45-Minute Coaching and Tapping Calls – Each week we will have a 45-minute call in which we will review the week’s progress, tap for any new issues that have arisen, tap on the core issues standing in the way of progress, and create very specific actions steps to be taken over the next week. ($2100 value)
  • Weekly SOS Tapping Call – Sometimes issues and resistance to taking action pop up. I would hate for you to feel like you have to wait for our next call to receive tapping help. Every week you will have the opportunity to have one 15-minute SOS call where you can jump on the phone and do a little tapping with me. ($700 value)

  • Email Support – This is something that I only offer to clients working with me for a long period of time. I will respond to any email within 24 hours. This is a great way to get questions answered promptly and keep you moving toward your goals.

  • Advanced Tapping Techniques – In this 8-hour audio training course I teach you exactly how I tap, the tools I use in client sessions and when I am working on my own, and how to know which tools to use in each situation. ($497 value)

  • 10 Question Process – I use this process for tasks as small as rearranging my office and as big as creating a new product line. In over 3 hours of audios I will teach you the process so you can use it again and again to figure out your next steps and name the core issues getting in your way. ($187 value)

  • 6 Months Access To The Ruach Center – The Ruach Center is a membership website that has over 200 tapping audios and hours of instruction to help you to eliminate self-sabotage and take action. Every morning you will receive email with a link to a new tap-along audio to help you start off your day on the right foot. ($97 value)

[Note: If you purchased Advanced Tapping Techniques or the 10 Questions Process in the last six months I will apply that purchase price to the cost of this program.]

Yes, This Is A Serious Investment.

That is over $4800 in products and personalized service.

I am offering this program for an investment of $3750. (There is also a four month payment plan available.)

Yes, this is a serious investment.

BUT that is exactly what it is, an investment in yourself. This isn’t about the next four months or about achieving some short term goals.

The transformation on offer will be carried with you throughout your life. The skills you learn through this transformation will be useful again and again in the future.

Is This Right For You?

This isn’t for everyone. Like I said above, I can only to work with 8 people in this program.

We need to make sure that we are a good fit. I don’t want you to waste your time and money. If you are interested I need you to fill out a short application (it is only four questions). After I read the application I will get in touch with you. If we seem like a good fit I’ll set up a time for us to talk so we can have a conversation to see if that is the case.

Then and only then, we will begin.

If this is going to work it has to be the right fit. This is non-negotiable for me and it should be non-negotiable for you too.

Are you interested? Then click the link and fill out the application.

>> Yes! I am ready to clear the core issues holding me back and achieve my goals!

If you have any questions just reply to this note and I will answer anything you have.

I look forward to serving you,

Gene

PS: Remember, when we clear a core issue related to a goal we are not just clearing it for that goal, but for all areas of our life. When you do this work the effect will ripple into all areas of your life and not just for four months, but for the rest of your life. Join me on this journey.

PPS: If you are a small business owner and are looking for something more comprehensive geared to growing your business reply to this message so we can set up a longer conversation.

Filed Under: Notes

Pod #204: EFT For Growing Positive Emotions

January 20, 2016 By Gene Monterastelli Leave a Comment

EFT For Growing Positive Emotions

The Center For Nonviolent Communication created one of my favorite tools, the feelings inventory, which I used a great deal when working with the incarcerated.

I found that the men I had the opportunity to work with lacked vocabulary when it came to describing emotions. Even though their emotional experience was highly nuanced, they had only a very limited way of talking about it.

Talking about and creating change is difficult with a limited emotional vocabulary because our experience can only be described in stark and blunt terms.

In working with these inmates I found that when I spent time with a comprehensive list of emotions it deepened my understanding of my own experience, which helped me to transform my emotional state.

This week I share a simple tool with you to help transform your emotional state. If you have ever thought “I don’t know what to tap on” or “I don’t know where to start” then this is the tool for you.

Filed Under: Podcast Tagged With: Emotions, Positive

What You Are NOT Doing Is Breaking My Heart

January 18, 2016 By Gene Monterastelli Leave a Comment

What Makes My heart

A few weeks ago I was tapping with one of my clients for a deep ache she was feeling in her heart.

The situation: she was in the process of filling up one of her programs and was having lots of conversations with prospective clients who would be perfect for it. They would commit to the program, get really excited…and then back out at the last minute.

My client said, “It’s not that I am worried about the loss of the sale but my heart aches over the fact that they are so close experiencing transformation and they are letting their fear get the best of them. I can sympathise because I was there once too! I know what it is like being scared of change.”

“Even knowing that, it still makes my heart ache knowing they are not making their lives better. They are so close and it hurts to see them miss out.”

Amen to that!

It SUCKS to see people so close, only to have them back out.

I’m not saying this for effect, but just like my client expressed above my heart aches when I see people miss opportunities to transform.

Last Friday I had a conversation with someone who is considering my most recent program. We talked a lot about what happens when we change and how sometimes change (even for the good) can be scary.

I asked her, “How will you feel 5 months from now if you don’t do this and you are still in exactly the same place?”

She loved the question so much she asked me to email it to her so she could reflect on it over the weekend as she was making her decision.

I don’t want you to miss this opportunity.

There are only a total of 8 spaces in this program because I want to make sure everyone receives the attention they deserve.

This isn’t for everyone on my list, but it might be for you.

Look at the details below and let me know if you would like to have a conversation to see if this is the right fit for you.

Have a great Monday,

Gene

PS: Imagine what it will be like 5 months to feel a new sense of freedom in your life AND imagine what it will be like to laugh at how silly you were when you were on the fence about this, because now you know it was a great choice!

PPS: If you are ready to have a conversation to see if this is the right fit for you, just let me know here: https://tappingqanda.com/?p=10897


The Cost Of Looking Fear In The Eye

Last year I spent some time trying to figure out what my next venture would be.

Working on a new project that calls on my creativity feeds my soul.

The project I was considering was a new podcast called “Facing Fear”. My plan was to record a weekly podcast where I would explore one of my deepest, darkest fears.

I’m talking about the kind of fears that would have me tossing and turning for hours in the middle of the night.

Fears like:

  • There is nothing exceptional about me.
  • I’m 42. Since I haven’t found anyone to love me yet, I never will, and will die alone.
  • I spend too much time worrying about my own crap and my loved ones don’t know that I care about them.
  • I am just filling my life with tasks so as to avoid facing my loneliness.
  • At my core I am really a selfish person. I worry more about replacing my computer than I do about the real suffering in the world.

I know. It’s upbeat stuff. My heart aches a little just in typing that list.

Each morning I set aside a little time to work on the project.

My list grew and grew as I tried to find the ten “best” fears for the first set of shows. I started outlining short essays about each fear and what I believed to be the root cause.

I found myself practicing the wording about the fears for the recordings while I was in the shower or on my exercise bike.

Then something really unexpected happened…

One afternoon I went to get a glass of water and there were no glasses in my cupboard.

A Pile Of Dishes In The Sink And No Clean Bowls Or Glasses

I know that an empty cupboard isn’t really such an odd thing but let’s consider a few facts.

  • I live alone.
  • I have at least a dozen glasses.
  • When I am looking for an excuse to be busy and feel productive I do dishes.

That last point is the important one.

Whenever I am trying to avoid my worries about things that feel dangerous or overwhelming I head straight to my kitchen and clean.

In that moment I noticed that my counter and sink were cluttered with dishes. Almost every dish I owned was visible and dirty.

And the reason was because I was so busy doing more important tasks that I wasn’t feeling the negative emotions about those tasks.

By thinking about this new podcast I was facing my fears head on and healing them.

I have never been so happy to see a pile of dirty dishes in my life!

It Wasn’t Just Clearing Core Issues. There Was Another Key Factor

I need to be clear it wasn’t just a matter of facing my fears. Three key factors created the change:

  1. I named my fears fully and honestly.
  2. I thought about the root causes of those fears in a systematic way.
  3. I was working towards a clear set of goals.

Wallowing in my fears would not have been helpful. That can become self-indulgent and unhealthy.

Taking the time to uproot the fears meant that I was healing and feeling better BUT real transformation only happened because I had a clearly-defined list of goals and I was able to step into action.

The Right Number Of Goals

I think there was also a secondary factor that contributed to my success in taking action: I had the right number of goals.

There have been times in my life where I have had a full page of detailed goals. Goals for my personal life, my physical health, my spiritual growth, and my business.

It’s great to have that sort of clarity, but in truth I have found it difficult to commit to working towards so many goals.

Around the time I started working on the fear project I had pared down my list of goals to just three.

I wasn’t saying that my life was perfect or that I only needed to work on three goals but by focusing on just three I was able to give each one the attention required to make real progress. I had learned that spreading myself too thinly meant that I wasn’t moving forward with anything.

You Can Do This Too!

I want you to have the opportunity to experience what I did.

I want you to have the opportunity to find and clear the core issues holding you back. I want you to have a clear idea of what you want AND I want to support you so you don’t have to figure this out on your own.

In the past I have offered 8-month programs which have been more geared toward business owners.

This winter I am offering a 4-month program focused on transformation in your daily life.

This program will help you to get clear about what you want, uncover what is holding you back, and guide you as you clear those issues systematically.

Here Is What The Program Includes:

This will be in the format of a 3-hour phone or Skype call, which will be recorded. (Yes, we will take breaks as needed.) At the end of the call we will have a clear plan with well-framed goals and benchmarks to measure your progress along the way. (Assessments, planning sessions, tap-along audio, clearly articulated goals, and plan – $1000 value)

[Note: We don’t have to do this as a call. You are welcome to come to NYC and we can do this work together in person. I will even buy you lunch!]

After each call you will receive an audio recording of the session so that you can return to the tapping we did AND you will be given a tapping code that you can do twice a day to help you to continue clearing the issues covered during the session.

  • Goal, Asset, and Obstacle Assessment – Before we can begin we need to know where you are right now in your life. This assessment is designed to help us gain a clear picture of the obstacles you face and your unaccessed assets to allow you to reach your goals (even if you aren’t quite sure what they are right now).

  • Core Issue Assessment – Most of my clients have one or two core issues holding them back in many areas of their life. This assessment will help us to zero in on those core issues to guide our work.

  • Assessment Prep Tap-Along Audio – Starting a process like this can feel a little scary. You might be worried that we will uncover something awful or that you will do the assessment wrong. There are no right or wrong answers in these assessments but to make it easier for you I have created a tap-along audio to help you to feel comfortable and safe as you go through the process.

  • Kick Start Planning Call And Long Term Plan – After you have completed the assessments and I have had the chance to study them we will create your personal plan. During this call we’ll define your focus for the program in the form of three goals. We will also find clarity on which core issues we will target head on.

  • 14 Weekly 45-Minute Coaching and Tapping Calls – Each week we will have a 45-minute call in which we will review the week’s progress, tap for any new issues that have arisen, tap on the core issues standing in the way of progress, and create very specific actions steps to be taken over the next week. ($2100 value)
  • Weekly SOS Tapping Call – Sometimes issues and resistance to taking action pop up. I would hate for you to feel like you have to wait for our next call to receive tapping help. Every week you will have the opportunity to have one 15-minute SOS call where you can jump on the phone and do a little tapping with me. ($700 value)

  • Email Support – This is something that I only offer to clients working with me for a long period of time. I will respond to any email within 24 hours. This is a great way to get questions answered promptly and keep you moving toward your goals.

  • Advanced Tapping Techniques – In this 8-hour audio training course I teach you exactly how I tap, the tools I use in client sessions and when I am working on my own, and how to know which tools to use in each situation. ($497 value)

  • 10 Question Process – I use this process for tasks as small as rearranging my office and as big as creating a new product line. In over 3 hours of audios I will teach you the process so you can use it again and again to figure out your next steps and name the core issues getting in your way. ($187 value)

  • 6 Months Access To The Ruach Center – The Ruach Center is a membership website that has over 200 tapping audios and hours of instruction to help you to eliminate self-sabotage and take action. Every morning you will receive email with a link to a new tap-along audio to help you start off your day on the right foot. ($97 value)

[Note: If you purchased Advanced Tapping Techniques or the 10 Questions Process in the last six months I will apply that purchase price to the cost of this program.]

Yes, This Is A Serious Investment.

That is over $4800 in products and personalized service.

I am offering this program for an investment of $3750. (There is also a four month payment plan available.)

Yes, this is a serious investment.

BUT that is exactly what it is, an investment in yourself. This isn’t about the next four months or about achieving some short term goals.

The transformation on offer will be carried with you throughout your life. The skills you learn through this transformation will be useful again and again in the future.

Is This Right For You?

This isn’t for everyone. Like I said above, I can only to work with 8 people in this program.

We need to make sure that we are a good fit. I don’t want you to waste your time and money. If you are interested I need you to fill out a short application (it is only four questions). After I read the application I will get in touch with you. If we seem like a good fit I’ll set up a time for us to talk so we can have a conversation to see if that is the case.

Then and only then, we will begin.

If this is going to work it has to be the right fit. This is non-negotiable for me and it should be non-negotiable for you too.

Are you interested? Then click the link and fill out the application.

>> Yes! I am ready to clear the core issues holding me back and achieve my goals!

If you have any questions just reply to this note and I will answer anything you have.

I look forward to serving you,

Gene

PS: Remember, when we clear a core issue related to a goal we are not just clearing it for that goal, but for all areas of our life. When you do this work the effect will ripple into all areas of your life and not just for four months, but for the rest of your life. Join me on this journey.

PPS: If you are a small business owner and are looking for something more comprehensive geared to growing your business reply to this message so we can set up a longer conversation.

Filed Under: Notes

Pod #203: EFT For Confidence

January 13, 2016 By Gene Monterastelli 1 Comment

EFT FOR ConfidenceIn my own life I have found that my level of confidence has less to do with how good I am at something and much more to do with how comfortable I am with myself at a given moment.

I think it is a mistake to believe that all we need to do is get better at something to be more confident. In reality confidence is all about who we allow to be the judge our success.

No matter how good we are we will not feel confident if we judge success based on what others think.

This week we tap to shift mentally how we see our actions moving from judging our success based on other’s interpretation of events to our own.

Filed Under: Podcast Tagged With: Confidence

Facing My Fears Unexpectedly Led To Action

January 12, 2016 By Gene Monterastelli

The Cost Of Looking Fear In The Eye

a sink full of dirty dishes made me happyLast year I spent some time trying to figure out what my next venture would be.

Working on a new project that calls on my creativity feeds my soul.

The project I was considering was a new podcast called “Facing Fear”. My plan was to record a weekly podcast where I would explore one of my deepest, darkest fears.

I’m talking about the kind of fears that would have me tossing and turning for hours in the middle of the night.

Fears like:

    • There is nothing exceptional about me.
    • I’m 42. Since I haven’t found anyone to love me yet, I never will, and will die alone.
    • I spend too much time worrying about my own crap and my loved ones don’t know that I care about them.
    • I am just filling my life with tasks so as to avoid facing my loneliness.
    • At my core I am really a selfish person. I worry more about replacing my computer than I do about the real suffering in the world.

 

I know. It’s upbeat stuff. My heart aches a little just in typing that list.

Each morning I set aside a little time to work on the project.

My list grew and grew as I tried to find the ten “best” fears for the first set of shows. I started outlining short essays about each fear and what I believed to be the root cause.

I found myself practicing the wording about the fears for the recordings while I was in the shower or on my exercise bike.

Then something really unexpected happened…

One afternoon I went to get a glass of water and there were no glasses in my cupboard.

A Pile Of Dishes In The Sink And No Clean Bowls Or Glasses

I know that an empty cupboard isn’t really such an odd thing but let’s consider a few facts.

    • I live alone.
    • I have at least a dozen glasses.
    • When I am looking for an excuse to be busy and feel productive I do dishes.

 

That last point is the important one.

Whenever I am trying to avoid my worries about things that feel dangerous or overwhelming I head straight to my kitchen and clean.

In that moment I noticed that my counter and sink were cluttered with dishes. Almost every dish I owned was visible and dirty.

And the reason was because I was so busy doing more important tasks that I wasn’t feeling the negative emotions about those tasks.

By thinking about this new podcast I was facing my fears head on and healing them.

I have never been so happy to see a pile of dirty dishes in my life!

It Wasn’t Just Clearing Core Issues. There Was Another Key Factor

I need to be clear it wasn’t just a matter of facing my fears. Three key factors created the change:

    1. I named my fears fully and honestly.
    2. I thought about the root causes of those fears in a systematic way.
    3. I was working towards a clear set of goals.

 

Wallowing in my fears would not have been helpful. That can become self-indulgent and unhealthy.

Taking the time to uproot the fears meant that I was healing and feeling better BUT real transformation only happened because I had a clearly-defined list of goals and I was able to step into action.

The Right Number Of Goals

I think there was also a secondary factor that contributed to my success in taking action: I had the right number of goals.

There have been times in my life where I have had a full page of detailed goals. Goals for my personal life, my physical health, my spiritual growth, and my business.

It’s great to have that sort of clarity, but in truth I have found it difficult to commit to working towards so many goals.

Around the time I started working on the fear project I had pared down my list of goals to just three.

I wasn’t saying that my life was perfect or that I only needed to work on three goals but by focusing on just three I was able to give each one the attention required to make real progress. I had learned that spreading myself too thinly meant that I wasn’t moving forward with anything.

You Can Do This Too!

I want you to have the opportunity to experience what I did.

I want you to have the opportunity to find and clear the core issues holding you back. I want you to have a clear idea of what you want AND I want to support you so you don’t have to figure this out on your own.

In the past I have offered 8-month programs which have been more geared toward business owners.

This winter I am offering a 4-month program focused on transformation in your daily life.

This program will help you to get clear about what you want, uncover what is holding you back, and guide you as you clear those issues systematically.

Here Is What The Program Includes:

This will be in the format of a 3-hour phone or Skype call, which will be recorded. (Yes, we will take breaks as needed.) At the end of the call we will have a clear plan with well-framed goals and benchmarks to measure your progress along the way. (Assessments, planning sessions, tap-along audio, clearly articulated goals, and plan – $1000 value)

[Note: We don’t have to do this as a call. You are welcome to come to NYC and we can do this work together in person. I will even buy you lunch!]

After each call you will receive an audio recording of the session so that you can return to the tapping we did AND you will be given a tapping code that you can do twice a day to help you to continue clearing the issues covered during the session.

    • Goal, Asset, and Obstacle Assessment – Before we can begin we need to know where you are right now in your life. This assessment is designed to help us gain a clear picture of the obstacles you face and your unaccessed assets to allow you to reach your goals (even if you aren’t quite sure what they are right now).

       

    • Core Issue Assessment – Most of my clients have one or two core issues holding them back in many areas of their life. This assessment will help us to zero in on those core issues to guide our work.

       

    • Assessment Prep Tap-Along Audio – Starting a process like this can feel a little scary. You might be worried that we will uncover something awful or that you will do the assessment wrong. There are no right or wrong answers in these assessments but to make it easier for you I have created a tap-along audio to help you to feel comfortable and safe as you go through the process.

       

    • Kick Start Planning Call And Long Term Plan – After you have completed the assessments and I have had the chance to study them we will create your personal plan. During this call we’ll define your focus for the program in the form of three goals. We will also find clarity on which core issues we will target head on.

       

    • 14 Weekly 45-Minute Coaching and Tapping Calls – Each week we will have a 45-minute call in which we will review the week’s progress, tap for any new issues that have arisen, tap on the core issues standing in the way of progress, and create very specific actions steps to be taken over the next week. ($2100 value)
    • Weekly SOS Tapping Call – Sometimes issues and resistance to taking action pop up. I would hate for you to feel like you have to wait for our next call to receive tapping help. Every week you will have the opportunity to have one 15-minute SOS call where you can jump on the phone and do a little tapping with me. ($700 value)

       

    • Email Support – This is something that I only offer to clients working with me for a long period of time. I will respond to any email within 24 hours. This is a great way to get questions answered promptly and keep you moving toward your goals.

       

    • Advanced Tapping Techniques – In this 8-hour audio training course I teach you exactly how I tap, the tools I use in client sessions and when I am working on my own, and how to know which tools to use in each situation. ($497 value)

       

    • 10 Question Process – I use this process for tasks as small as rearranging my office and as big as creating a new product line. In over 3 hours of audios I will teach you the process so you can use it again and again to figure out your next steps and name the core issues getting in your way. ($187 value)

       

    • 6 Months Access To The Ruach Center – The Ruach Center is a membership website that has over 200 tapping audios and hours of instruction to help you to eliminate self-sabotage and take action. Every morning you will receive email with a link to a new tap-along audio to help you start off your day on the right foot. ($97 value)

       

 

[Note: If you purchased Advanced Tapping Techniques or the 10 Questions Process in the last six months I will apply that purchase price to the cost of this program.]

Yes, This Is A Serious Investment.

That is over $4800 in products and personalized service.

I am offering this program for an investment of $3750. (There is also a four month payment plan available.)

Yes, this is a serious investment.

BUT that is exactly what it is, an investment in yourself. This isn’t about the next four months or about achieving some short term goals.

The transformation on offer will be carried with you throughout your life. The skills you learn through this transformation will be useful again and again in the future.

Is This Right For You?

This isn’t for everyone. Like I said above, I can only to work with 8 people in this program.

We need to make sure that we are a good fit. I don’t want you to waste your time and money. If you are interested I need you to fill out a short application (it is only four questions). After I read the application I will get in touch with you. If we seem like a good fit I’ll set up a time for us to talk so we can have a conversation to see if that is the case.

Then and only then, we will begin.

If this is going to work it has to be the right fit. This is non-negotiable for me and it should be non-negotiable for you too.

Are you interested? Then click the link and fill out the application.

>> Yes! I am ready to clear the core issues holding me back and achieve my goals!

If you have any questions just reply to this note and I will answer anything you have.

I look forward to serving you,

Gene

PS: Remember, when we clear a core issue related to a goal we are not just clearing it for that goal, but for all areas of our life. When you do this work the effect will ripple into all areas of your life and not just for four months, but for the rest of your life. Join me on this journey.

PPS: If you are a small business owner and are looking for something more comprehensive geared to growing your business reply to this message so we can set up a longer conversation.

Filed Under: Notes, Q&A

Pod #202: EFT For Not Being Ashamed Of Your Dreams

January 6, 2016 By Gene Monterastelli 1 Comment

EFT For Not Being Ashamed Of Your Dreams

“In most pursuits, one’s self is one of the biggest hurdles to get over. You can’t pursue something and be committed to it if you’re apologizing for it at every party.” – Lisa Kudrow, Vasser Commencement Address, 2010

For some reason part of us believes that it is not proper to want more.

Maybe it is because we recognize that we already have it better than so many other people. Maybe it is because we have been taught that we should know our place. Maybe it is because we don’t want to jinx our dream by saying it out loud.

Regardless of the reason, there is often something in us that feels ashamed of our dreams and ashamed of wanting more than we already have. Not only does this prevent us from striving for more, it also adds the emotional burden of feeling shame, my least favorite emotion.

Here is a simple tap-along to help you feel more comfortable with your dreams, which will lead to meaningful action.

PDF of tapping script.

Filed Under: Podcast Tagged With: Dreams, Goals, Shame

Pod #201: How To Make EFT A Daily Habit

December 30, 2015 By Gene Monterastelli Leave a Comment

How To Make EFT A Daily HabitAs we move into the new year I am guessing you are like most people as you consider the goals you want to achieve in 2016.

EFT can be such a powerful tool in helping you make the changes you want in life and will have the highest impact when used daily.

Here is what you can do to set yourself up for success in the new year by establishing EFT as a habit.

Filed Under: Podcast

Pod #200: What To Do When Your Speaking Voice And Your Inner Voice Are In Conflict While Tapping

December 24, 2015 By Gene Monterastelli Leave a Comment

What To Do When Your Speaking Voice And Your Inner Voice Are In Conflict While Tapping BlurI hear it all the time from my clients when we are tapping together. We’ll finish a round of tapping and they will report that while we are tapping their critical voice is saying the exact opposite to our tapping phrases.

I know how frustrating this can feel, but in reality it is one of the best outcomes to happen when you are tapping.

That seems counterintuitive, but it is quite true!

Listen here to see why and how you can leverage this to get more out of your tapping.

Filed Under: Podcast Tagged With: Critical Voice, How To, Phrases, What To Say

Pod #199: EFT For Clarity When Making Big Decisions

December 16, 2015 By Gene Monterastelli 3 Comments

Big DecisionsMaking big decisions can be difficult because the choices aren’t always clear-cut and there may be many pros and cons to consider.

When this happens it can cause us to seize up and fail to make a choice at all.

Here is a tap-along audio to help you clear your head and make the best choice you can.

Filed Under: Podcast Tagged With: Choice, Decision

Pod #198: EFT For Beating Yourself Up Over Your Past

December 9, 2015 By Gene Monterastelli 1 Comment

EFT For Beating Yourself Up Over Your PastAs humans we are skilled at learning from our past.

This also means that we can be overly critical and spend too much time beating ourselves up over poor choices we have made in the past.

Part of us resists self-forgiveness because of the concern that we will repeat the same mistake over and over again.

Here is a tap-along audio to help you stop beating yourself up for the past and know that you have learned the lessons from your mistakes.

Filed Under: Podcast Tagged With: Forgiveness, Self Love, Self Respect

Pod #197: EFT For Resisting Doing EFT

December 4, 2015 By Gene Monterastelli 1 Comment

Resisting EFTThere is an amazing contradiction that exists for most people who use EFT. On one hand we know how powerful it is. On the other hand we don’t use it as much as we could.

I have even heard many clients report that there are times when they actively resist tapping. Just last week I had a client tell me:

I knew I should tap because my emotions were getting the best of me. While thinking this there was a part of me that just said “No! I refuse to tap.” It was almost as if there was a small child inside of me that was throwing a temper tantrum refusing to do it.

There is a very good reason why we resist tapping.

Here is why we struggle AND what you can do about it.

Filed Under: Podcast Tagged With: Resistance

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Meet Gene Monterastelli

Gene MonterastelliGene Monterastelli is a Brooklyn based tapping practitioner. In addition to working with individual clients and groups, he regularly writes and records about how to use tapping to move from self-sabotage to productive action.
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