Tapping Q & A with Gene Monterastelli - Get the most out of tapping and EFT

My Goal Isn’t Believable (2 of 10)

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[Note: This is part 2 of a 10 part series on using EFT/Tapping for weight release with a new article or podcast being added every 10 days. The complete series can be found @ weight release series.]


photo by Hans Gerwitz

One of the most difficult things about weight release is believing that we can achieve our goals. Often we are often carry the baggage of failed past attempts at weight release, a family history of carrying too much weight, and the fact that we have held the weight for so long it seem that is stuck and can't possibly be released.

In my own life there are few emotions that I enjoy less than the feeling of failure. Often when we fail we have to face the fact that we are incapable of doing something, we feel we have wasted time and effort, and that others are going to see us as less because of our failing.

Because of these fears it is very easy to see why it is so hard for us act. There is a part of us that sees the consequences of us failing. The way it protects us from feeling all of these emotions associated with failure is it creates situation where we self sabotage ourselves. In the short term it is keeping us safe from feeling bad about failing, but in the long term it is preventing us form achieving our goals.

This is not only true for weight release, but can also be true for any goal that we are trying to achieve. For this reason I think one of the most important steps we can take when we are tapping for a change in behavior or tapping to help us achieve a future goal is to tap for clearing the fear of failure.

Here are some tapping patters for some of the most common reasons and emotions associated with failure.

Fear Of Failing

I don't want to fail…failing is no fun…when I fail at any task…it points out my short coming to myself…and to others…when I try something and fail…it is a giant waste of time…I could be using this time at something I am good at…but I choose to know that failure is not inevitable…it is possible that I might not fail this time…I don't always fail…I also know that there have been times in which I have failed that have been good for me…I have learned valuable lessons in may of my failings…if I only try the things that I know are going to work out…then I am going to try nothing new…I am never going to grow…there are times in my life where I have tried new things…and they didn't work out the way I would have liked…but they did work out in a way that was beneficial for me…there are also many lessons that I can learn in failing…this does not mean I need to seek failure out…but I can takes this moments of failure and use them as a way to grow and develop…I also might surprise myself by what I am able to achieve…there are times in which I have underestimated myself…and what I can achieve…I give myself permission to try…I give myself permission to know it might not work out…but it is still worth trying…because if I succeed there is a chance for growth…and if I fail there is a chance for learning…both are good for me in the long run.

I Have Failed Before At Weight Release

I have tried to release weight in the past and have failed…I failed before and I am going to fail again…there is no reason to try…because it is going to be a giant waste of time…I might as well just be resigned to the fact this is the way it is…but I choose to know there are times in the past in which I did not succeed the first time I tried…there are times where I learned many lessons before I got it right…there were also times where I made the same mistake over and over again before I got it right…but I did get it right…there are many times I have tried in the past to release this weight that did not work…and there are lots of reasons for this…but this is a new time…and a new way…if I try and release this weight and fail I am still in the same spot…but if I try and release weight and succeed that is progress I want…so by trying I am not going to make it worse…but I do have a chance to make it better….I choose to learn the lessons from all the attempts in the past that did not work…and use this knowledge to move forward in a new way…I know that the frustration of not being successful and choose to take the frustration of failure in the past…and transform that energy into a motivating energy to make better choices…I it no longer beating me up for the past…but now becomes my greatest cheer leader and encourager…moving me forward in a way that will help to breed success

Everyone In My Family Is Over Weight So I Will Be As Well

Everyone in my family is over weight…it is just how we are…you can't fight your gene pool…some people are just over weight because that is how there body is made…I have seen many family members try and release weight in the past and failed…therefore there is no hope for me…but I choose to know there is more to weight than genetics…there are whole groups of people in my family who have choose the buy into the same world view…and are creating a situation which makes it ease for all of them to continue to hold the extra weight…this does not have to be my way…there are other parts of my life in which I have choose an different path than the rest of the family…we are not all exactly alike…by choose to release weight I am not dismissing or abandoning my family…I am still part of the family…I am just choosing my own way…maybe my choices will model for the rest of the family that this sort of transformation is possible…just because it has been this way for my family doesn't mean it has to be this way for me…I know weight is more than just genetics

My Goal Is Too Big

There is no way I am going to achieve my goal…because it is just too big…it would be one thing if I was trying to release much less weight…but I am so far behind there is no way I am going to catch up…it is too late because the goal is so big…but I choose to know that weight release it not for the short term…to create a change for my entire lifetime…I am not only effecting today…but am effecting my whole life…this is process that is going to happen little by little…as much as I would like to release all this weight all at once…it is much healthy for me to release it a little at a time…it is safer for my body to release weight in a natural way…because I can't release it all at once I don't need to worry about releasing it all…I have satisfied in the fact that my goal in the short term can be much smaller…as I achieve each of these smaller short term goals…I will be working to my long term goal…by working to my long term goal in small ways…it becomes much more achievable…therefore my long term goal is not too big…because it is something that will take time…but will impact the rest of my life.

In part 3 of this series I interview Catherine Poole about the association of specific emotions and our problem areas.

Would you like to work with Gene one-on-one with your weight release? Here is the current weight release special.

Making It Safe To Heal With EFT/Giving Ourselves Permission To Heal (part 1 of 10)

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[Note: This is part 1 of a 10 part series on using EFT/Tapping for weight release with a new article or podcast being added every 10 days. The complete series can be found @ weight release series.]


photo by Dan Dickinson

Our body/system does not have an agenda. There is nothing that our body/system does unless it believes it is the best thing for us. There are times in which the body/system is making a choice from misinformation, but it is only providing the information that it thinks is going to keep us safe.

For example, lets look at a fear of public speaking. When we have a fear of public speaking it is because the system thinks there is great danger in public speaking. If we are in a situation where job promotion is based on our ability to speak in public this does not look like the system is protecting us. Instead the fear is hurting us.

In this case the system might fear, “If we speak in public everyone is going to see how stupid we really are. Every time we open our mouth in public we do something stupid. They are all going to laugh.”

Because the system is holding this belief it believes keeping us from speaking it is keeping us safe. The problem is in this case (like most limiting beliefs we have) it is keeping us safe from something that is not a real danger.

Because the system believes there is a danger in speaking is public there is going to be resistance to letting go of that fear of public system. The system sees that if we let go of the fear of public speaking (which is a defense mechanism) we are then going to end up in unsafe places. The system believes it is unsafe to heal this belief because we will then put ourselves in an unsafe situation (speaking in public in this case).

It becomes much easier to heal this fear of public speaking when we are able to recognize (on a system/subconscious level) that it is safe to heal. This is an easy task that can be achieved easily (as we will see) by tapping.

When the body is carrying extra weight the system almost always believes that there is a reason for holding the weight. On the level of looking at physical symptoms as metaphor, extra weight is a prefect metaphor for not feeling safe in the world. The extra weight is a shield or a mechanism to keep others away. (I have heard this from countless clients when we do deep parts work.)

Our natural state is to be fit and healthy, therefore the system has to be working overtime to be holding the weight. In this case it is clear the system sees the weight as being needed and therefore believes that it is unsafe to release the weight.

The first step in any weight release program is let the system it is safe to heal. Here is how I would tap to start this process:

My body is holding extra weight…it is doing this because if feels I need the weight…it also feel that I will be unsafe…or the world will be unsafe…if I release the weight…my system thinks I am going to be unsafe…the body is working really hard to keep this weight…because it wants me to be safe…I recognize how hard the system has to work to keep this weight…I am happy my body is willing to work so hard…but I know the tact it is choosing isn't the best for me in the short or long term…by recognizing how hard the body is working to keep me safe…I don't need to keep doing the same thing…right now I am speaking to the part of me that is keeping the weight…I let it know and my whole system know that is it safe for me to heal…I am worthy of this healing…the world can be a safe place for me…I can thrive in the world in a safe way…and release this weight…the shield of weight can be changed in to a more effective way of protecting myself…the weight isn't keeping me safe…I know the body is trying to shield me…but extra weight is not the best way to keep me safe…it is safe for me to heal and release this weight…because in this process I am going to find the true issues that need healing…they extra weight is a symptom…it is part of my system calling out to the need for deeper healing…because I am aware of this face…the weight has done its job by letting me know there is deeper healing needed…by walking down this path I am going to move forward in many areas of my life…which is what I want…and am worthy of healing the weight…it is safe for me to move forward…part of the reason it is safe is because I am not doing to do it all at once…this will be bit by bit…I know my system wants what is best for me…I want the system to know I appreciate all the work it is doing for me…and I want the system to be more effective in its work…one of the ways this is going to happen is by letting this transformation to happen…in a safe and healthy way…it is safe for me to heal the issues of this extra weight

In part 2 of this series we will look at when we don't believe our goal is achievable.

Would you like to work with Gene one-on-one with your weight release? Here is the current weight release special.

Asking For Proof

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photo by euthman

In my work with clients I do a great deal of parts work. Parts work is nothing more than a very easy way of isolating a part of our system to find information about the issue we are working on.

One of the very easy ways of doing parts work is to have a little conversation with a part of the body. Often time this conversation is with a physical sensation. It could be a physical pain (like an aching muscle) or the physical feeling (like tightness in the stomach accompanying nervousness). Once we have tuned into this part of the body we are working on we can ask it question. To do this we simply pretend that we are able to have a conversation with part of the body.

Once I am “talking” to this part of my body/system one of the first questions I often ask is, “Why do you exist?” or “What are you worried about?” or “What are you trying to keep me safe from?” These questions can give us the underlying belief that is keeping the issues in the system. We can get answers like, “You are going to get hurt.” “People will laugh if you fail.” “You are not good enough.” “It is too hard.”

You will notice that in almost every case these types of answers are about keeping us safe. The problem is many times it is trying to keep us safe from things that are not really dangerous. This is an example of the system trying to take care of us by protection us from things that we don't need protection from. Even though these worries are not founded, once we have uncovered them it becomes very ease for us to use this information to do Emotional Freedom Techniques(EFT)/tapping work.

Once we have uncovered the reason for the feeling there is a very useful question we can ask. Ask the part “What proof do you have that this is the case?” When we ask this question one of two things are going to happen. We could get a very clear answer of the proof the system has to hold this belief or we could see that the belief has no proof on why this is true. Both of these are very helpful outcomes.

When the answer to the question about proof comes back with examples it comes in two forms: examples from our life and examples from others experience. When we are reminded of similar situations in the past all we need to do is do some tapping on the past experience(s). As we clean up the past experience we will be cleaning up the issue that is at hand. When we are reminded of other experiences we can tap on how there situation is different than our own. As we clean up the beliefs of others experiences we are again cleaning up our own issues.

[Note: It is possible that when we ask this question we are going to get proof from our own life as well as proof from others experience. When this happens take each form of proof one at a time.]

There are times when we ask this question where the emotion/belief is not going to be able to provide any proof. This is still good news, but we need to take a little different approach. Anytime we have a part of ourselves that is hesitate or worried it is because there is a fear that we are going to get hurt, but in this case we are holding it without proof that this is the outcome we are going get. When this happens we need to recognize the fear is trying to keep us safe, let it know that we are safe, and let it know it can come back if there is a real danger. The tapping for this could look sound like this:

I thank this worry for being…the only reason it exists is because it is trying to keep me safe…it believes that there is possible danger out there for me…I am glad my system is trying to keep me safe by looking out for possible worries…but sometimes the system worries about dangers that aren't really there…or dangers that aren't as big as the system believes…that is what is happening right now…this emotion of fear and worry is just trying to keep me safe…it is just working too hard…I am glad that it is work so hard for me…but I give it permission to relax…it has done it job of warning me of a possible trouble…because I am aware of it I can deal with it if it comes up…so the system doesn't have to warn me of it any more…the worry has done its job…I am now safe…I can move forward knowing what to look out for…if for some reason this worry feels like it need to come back to warn me again…I welcome this…because I want to know about what possible issues are at hand…but for now I have my eyes open and am safe…I am thankful that my system is worried about my safety…I continue to empower my system to look out for me…know that just like right now I am going to hear the warning of they system to make the best choices for me.

Asking the question “What proof do you have to feel this way or to belief this?” isn't just limited to doing parts work. This is a question that can be incorporated into many tapping situations. Whenever we are facing a task or activity that we dread we can ask ourselves two question. First, ask “What is the penalty/consequence for me doing this?” You might come up with one or many penalties. For each penalty ask the questions, “What is the proof I have that this penalty/consequence is going to happing?” Based on the answers to these questions we follow the same steps as above to clear the resistance to change and to clear the issue.

Lesson Learned From Gary Craig & His Announced Retirement

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As many of you are aware Gary Craig has announced his retirement from the EFT community that he helped to craft and create. Gary's full announcement can be found on the EFT blog. For those of you who don't know Gary, he is the one who crafted EFT out of his experience with Thought Field Therapy and other modalities.

In one of the advanced Emotional Freedom Techniques(EFT)/tapping classes I teach one full class is devoted to lessons we can learn from great change work professionals. Gary is one of the people I feature in the class. In that vain here are two lessons that can be learned from Gary's work and two lessons that can be learned for Gary's announced retirement.

1) Often The Best Solution Is The Simplest Solution
Evolving Thought Field Therapy/Thought Field Therapy(TFT) is an amazing tool set. It is very powerful in clearing both physical and emotional issues. For each issue it constructs a very specific tapping pattern to clear the issue. As powerful as this is, it takes a very skilled professional to be able to come up with that tapping pattern. Gary was trained in TFT, he recognized how powerful the tool was, and wonder if there was a way to make it simpler so it could be placed in the hands of the public at large. The outcome was EFT. EFT is elegant in its simplicity. I have taught the basics of EFT on the back of a napkin in a busy bar in less than five minutes.

We as people, at least I do, love complexity. We feel the more complicated the solution better the solution must be. The creation of EFT shows us that sometimes a simpler solution will accomplish as much as a more complicated one. Because of this model I ask myself, “Is there a simpler way to do the exact same thing?” before I take the first step.

2) Power of Generosity
As you read the many comments on the EFT web site under Gary's announcement the word that appears over and over again is generous. Gary is a very generous man with his time and his talents. He provided his ideas and training very cheaply. Many of the resources were offered for free so that many could have access to the amazing tool that EFT is. Because of his generosity the community that built up around him responded in the same way.

His newsletter that was published every three or four days contained 3 new articles from practitioners from around the world sharing their insight while using EFT. It would be very easy for practitioners to keep their knowledge to themselves or to only share the information with their own readership. Instead they choose to share their knowledge with the community at larger hoping others could learn and grow from their insight.

The cynic might argue the reason people shared their knowledge on Gary's site was because the traffic was so great hoping to use the exposure to build their own practice. This might be true for some, but it was not for all. When I would read an article I really like I would track the author down to see if they had other articles they had written or if they had their own newsletter I could subscribe to. Many times these articles were not written by practitioners, but by people who used EFT in their own lives and they wanted to share in hopes it would help others.

Gary's generosity to the tapping community created a tapping community that was very generous in turn, not just with Gary, but with each other. I am blessed to have many new friends because of the community that wouldn't have existed without Gary's generosity.

3) You Must Take Care Of Yourself
Gary writes:

Finally, my physicians tell me that I have had a heart attack. I am unaware of when this happened and have no symptoms. Nonetheless, the tests show clearly that part of my heart has died. Accordingly, it is sheer idiocy for me to continue with the pressures of running EFT. To do so, is to risk another heart attack, stroke, etc. No thanks.

I can only image the struggle Gary went through as he made this choice. The number of profound healings that Gary has witnessed first hand and the countless notes he has received is mind-boggling. Walking away from something that he has cared some much about and given so much energy and time to in the last 15 years must be heart wrenching.

I don't know if I could do this.

This is something I preach to my clients all the time and something Gary is living out in this choice: We must take care of ourselves before we can take care of others. If we are not safe and/or healthy then we are in no position to care for others. Often we feel selfish in making this choice, but we do others little good if we are sick. Our health is paramount to us being able to help others. Gary should be applauded for his courage in making this choice.

4) Physical Being A Metaphor For The Emotional
I experience everything in two ways. First, just on a normal level as human seeing how my surrounding and current stimulus affects me. Second, I experience things as a practitioner. I am asking myself questions about why are thing happening the way they are. As a practitioner I was struck by the following:

Also, as should be apparent to most of our seasoned readers, some EFT'ers have been hyping their products in ways that tend to erode the spiritual essence of the EFT movement. This has resulted in some behind-the-scenes disagreements, deceit and other negative experiences. At the core, I prefer peace to pugilism and wish to distance myself from these unnecessary “fame and fortune” energies. As you will see below, I'm leaving for higher ground.

…

Nonetheless, the tests show clearly that part of my heart has died.

I have some insight into what Gary is eluding to in this part of his note. I don't know Gary personally (other than a few professional email back and forth), but do have a sense at how hard some of these situations were for him. It was a moment in which something he had created had grown well beyond himself and people were making choice that Gary himself would not make. In Gary's mind these weren't just practical choice of implementation of a protocol, but they were choices of ethics and virtue. It was very obvious in one of Gary's blog posts that this was a heart-breaking situation for him.

It is amazing the way our emotions and physical body can mirror and match one-another.

He Will Be Missed
Gary's presents in the tapping and change work communities are going to be missed. Even if you have never met or heard of Gary Craig but have learned something on this web site then your life (in ways unknown) has been touched by his work and generosity. I would not be doing this work today if it was not for Gary Craig.

Using Process Instructions [UPDATE]

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photo by alice (alicepopkorn)

One of the major misconceptions clients have when they come to work with me is they believe that I am going to do something or give them something that is going to make them change or heal. There are certainly times when I teach clients new resources they can use to address the issue they are facing, but in most cases I am simply helping clients to identify the resources they already possess (but for one reason or another are not accessing).

One of my favorite pieces of hypnotic patter I use in tapping sessions with clients is to say, “As you pay attention to [issue at hand] notice the resources you possess that you did not realize would be helpful or have forgotten about that would aid you in healing and transformation. Notice these resources as they spring to mind…”

I love the sense of surprise clients have, as resources come to light that we are then able to use tapping to use to address the issue at hand. [Remember: When working with a practitioner their job is to help you to access the healing tools you already possess.]

Sometimes, without the aid of a skilled practitioner it is hard to tap into these resources we possess because we are so close to the problem. We can have a great deal of resistance that prevents us from finding those resources by simply meditating on the patter offered above. [Note: For more information on resistance see these articles.]

When I have problems (and yes I do have problems) finding my way to the tools that I have to help in my own healing I turned to an Ericksonian hypnosis technique called “process instruction”. In there most over simplified form they are the combination of an unspecified verb, an adjective, and a nominalization (abstract noun) that guides the mind to accessing new perspective and unrealized resources.

The best part of process instructions is you don't need to understand a single word of the previous paragraph to make them work for you. You can just use the table below to come up with phrases.

The way I use process instructions with tapping is

  1. Tune into an issue I would like to see transformation in my life
  2. Choose a word from each column below
  3. Start tapping while thinking of the phrase and issue at hand

As I do this I simply pay attention to the new thoughts that I have. Often I am given new insight in to the problem. Other times I feel the charge release. While other times I see new paths that I can take to my healing.

I do this process with a pen and paper close by so I can write down my new insights.

After doing this for one phase I will move on to another combination. Obviously, some phrases are going to be more powerful than others, but if you take 2 minutes with 5 phrases you will generate a great deal of insight in just 10 minutes.

Here are a few examples of possible phrase that you focus on:

  • develop useful experiences
  • enjoy helpful understanding
  • clarify relevant purpose
  • discover positive support
  • identify curious process

Now on the surface some of these phrases might seem very nonsensical, but if you give your subconscious a chance to sit with these phrase as you tap you will be very surprised at what you come up with.

Unspecified Verbs Adjectives Nominalizations
Review Appropriate Experiences
Develop Valuable Understanding
Continue Useful Attitude
Enjoy Interesting Purpose
Discover Possible Knowledge
Achieve Curious Conclusion
Create Helpful Security
Generate Comfortable Arrangement
Encounter Effective Beliefs
Appreciate Satisfying Values
Change Worthwhile Learning
Control Relevant Expectation
Identify Helpful Support
Practice Original Process
Clarify Impressive Resources
Consider Positive Meaning

[UPDATE: After posting this article there were a number of questions about this process. I have added a bonus podcast where I talk about Process Instructions. Listen to process instruction podcast.]

A Formula To Come Up With Phrases…AKA I don’t know what to say

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One of the biggest struggles newcomers have with tapping/Emotional Freedom Techniques(EFT) is coming up with tapping phrases. I learned to find the ‘right' thing to say by reading lots of scripts and patter written by other practitioners. I found phrases, ideas, and formulas that will make it easier for you to come up with your own.

Recently, I found anther great formula on the late Karen Nauman's wonderful web site which sadly no longer exists.

Her approach is very simple and can be done in four easy steps:

Step 1 – Truth statement [Read more…] about A Formula To Come Up With Phrases…AKA I don't know what to say

Using Music From The Past To Clear The Past

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photo by Kevin Lawver

One of the most powerful tools I have added to my skill set from my hypnosis and NLP training is the understanding of anchors. In an over-simplified sense an anchor is really nothing more than the fact that one thing reminds you of something else, very similar to Pavlov's classical conditioning.

For example, the smell of just-baked bread can remind you of your grandmother's kitchen. Freshly cut grass might remind you of the playground when you were a child. Some anchors are stronger than others and they are not always positive. A sharp thumping sound could remind you of an auto accident you were in years ago, making you feel very tense right now.

The most common way anchoring is used in change work is to create one around something that is experienced throughout the day that will now remind us of something positive. For example, in a hypnosis session the suggestion would be set up that every time you see the color red you will think, “I am now a nonsmoker and will be a nonsmoker for the rest of my life.”

We can also use anchors another way: i.e. using ones that already exist to find our way to the roots of our issues and beliefs.

We are constantly creating powerful anchors with the music we listen to. This is particularly true with pop music. Most music is associated with a certain time because we hear it over and over while it's popular.

Depending on your age when you first heard The New Kids on The Block, The Bee Gees, The Doors, or The Beatles, you are immediately transported to a very specific time and place when you hear them again. (It's very possible that it just happened even as you read this list.)

These anchors are most powerful between the ages of 11-18, partly because these years are obviously very formative, and also just because of the sheer amount of music most of us listen to when we're younger.

Developmentally we are moving from dependence to independence during those years, and starting to create our identities as individuals. In the socially dangerous waters of middle and high schools it's very easy to have intense experiences that will create roots for many of the issues and beliefs we hold today.

Music that we are paying attention to, memorizing the words and melodies of, is playing almost constantly in the background at the same time that we are navigating through the often difficult and confusing experiences of becoming an adult. All of these emotions, thoughts, and beliefs get firmly anchored to these songs. Now we can use these anchors to our advantage.

Because we need to ‘tune' into an issue first in order to most effectively tap on it, this imbedded music is a perfect and ready-made path straight into the heart of the matter.

Recently some issues have surfaced in my own life. As I tuned in to my feelings I asked this question: “What do these emotions remind me of?” The answer was very clear: being fifteen years old. So I turned to the music I heard the most back then.

I created a playlist, loaded it onto my mp3 player and listened to it while taking my evening walk. My mind was flooded with memories; many of them good, others not so pleasurable.

I tapped while walking, but I didn't dwell long on any one issue or thought; I just let them come and go with the music. By the time I got home I was much more at peace about what was going in my life right now.

I encourage to you to play with this idea. Find some meaningful music from your past or even your here-and-now. Listen to it and tap away.

Parts Of The Body

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photo by Lady Pain

I was on a retreat recently where the retreat director spent a great deal of time talking about how we have become disconnected from our bodies in the modern world. This makes sense, as most of us no longer do work that requires a great amount of physical effort. Even though our lifestyle doesn’t require us to be in close contact with our bodies it doesn’t mean that we should lose that close connection with our bodies.

In addition to being essential to our interactions in the world, our bodies also contain a great deal of information. Injury or disease in the body can be read as a clear sign that our body is trying to share information or a lesson with us.

When I am not working on a specific issue, but instead just looking to the body for lessons and information, there are two ways I approach my body to get information and begin healing. With both techniques I have found myself starting with something small and moving to very profound healing. I call these “scanning the body” and “targeting specific systems and organs”.

Scan the Body
The first step is to simply scan the body through the following steps:

  • Sit up straight some where comfortable
  • Place your feel flat on the floor
  • Place your hands in your lap
  • Don't cross your arms, hands, or feet
  • Close your eyes
  • Take a few nice easy deep breaths

Once you are resting comfortably let your mind’s eye scan your body from head to toe paying attention to any aches, pains, stiffness, or congestion in your energy. As you do this, you will notice certain parts of your body appear most in need of attention.

As you find these places, use your favorite method to tap on them. (Tune into shape, color, weight, intensity, what the ache or pain has to say).

Continue this process as you move from part to part that needs attention.

Targeting Specific Systems and Organs
The second process I like to use with the body is to choose systems or organs of the body and tune into them and tap. This is nothing more complicated than closing your eyes and placing all your attention on your liver (for example). As you pay attention to your liver, simply move from one tapping point to another and then another.

Begin to have an imaginary conversation with your liver. Trust your intuition on this. Ask the liver what is needs and what it wants. Ask it if there is anything you can do for it. Offer it words of thanks and encouragement as you tap. Simply send healing energy to the liver.

As you do this you will be surprised at what comes to mind. When thought, emotions, and memories come up, don’t give them too much attention. Simply feel them and let them pass.

Conclusion
While on retreat Russ Hudson said, “If you are in touch with your body, mind, and spirit then, and only then, are you a candidate for real change.” In our modern world it is very common for us to lose contact with our bodies. If you use either of the exercises listed above, you’ll find yourself more in tune with your body moment to moment, and you will find your way to places of healing very quickly.

Journaling

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photo by Luigi Anzivino

A number of studies have indicated that the simple act of writing down what we are thinking and worrying about takes some of the charge out of the emotions. Dragging the thoughts into the light of day helps us to see what we are overreacting to and what is truly going on.

When we leave our thoughts alone in our head they have a tendency to be magnified. The mind serves as an echo chamber (especially in the middle of the night). Each time a thought or worry is bounced around it get stronger and stronger. We can combine Evolving Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT/EvEFT) with a simple task to take the charge out of our thoughts and feelings.

TYou simply set some time aside to write down everything that is bouncing around in your mind. Take the self-talk that is in your head and just let it flow. You don’t need any special journal to do this. You can even type it on the computer.

After you have done this you don’t have to save your writing. You can throw it away or just erase the computer file. The important task is to get it out of your head where it tends to be amplified.

I like to add EFT to this activity to continue to clean up the emotional charge. I do this is by opening a blank document on my computer and just letting my fingers go. I type as fast as the thoughts come to me. As this happens I start to see the things I am overreacting to, which takes some of the charge away.

After I finish typing I go back and re-read everything I have just written, tapping from point to point as I read. The emotions that have not been completely cleared out rise again while I read my own words. By tapping while reading my thought processes, I clear out even more of the emotional charge.

For the areas that have a great deal of emotional charge I read the passage two or three times while tapping.

In the process I tune in to the problem without worrying about exactly the right words to say because I’ve already produced them.

When I am done tapping I delete the file.

Getting Back To That Session That Was So Powerful

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photo by Meredith Farmer

Occasionally we have unusually powerful Evolving Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT/EvEFT) sessions. When we sit down later to tap, we wish there was a way to recapture the healing aspects of that session or continue to work on those issues. It is much easier to do than one would think.

There are times when I can relate to the issue my client is bringing up, so while they tap on their issue, I get to tap on my issue at the same time. There are other times when I can feel in my body what my client is feeling and we get a chance to tap on the issue together.

Recently I had an amazing experience with a client that was completely different from either of these. We were about 40 minutes into a session and were tapping on an issue that I had no particular relationship to. Very suddenly, I started yawning uncontrollably.
In this sort of energy work yawning is generally a sign of releasing energetic blocks, but I have never been in a circumstance where I yawned 30 times in a row. It was amazing, and afterwards I felt great. A huge burden that I had been working on for a number of weeks was released.

A few days later I wanted to tap back into this experience because I knew more needed to be done. As I tapped I just started thinking about the previous session, and once again the yawns starting coming fast and furious.

I was able to tap for three straight minutes thinking only of that last session, and the yawns didn’t stop. At that point I had finished the work I could do at that time.

As I thought about this experience, it wasn’t a great surprise. One of the things we do in hypnosis work is place a post-hypnotic suggestion allowing us to return instantly to the issue we are working on. This prevents us from having to do all the work of getting to the same point in the next session.

This works equally well with EFT. If you have worked on an issue before and had a great level of success, all you need do is tune into that tapping session and start tapping again. You can pick up right where you left off working before.

I found myself being grounded and present every 15 minutes all day long!

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A Chime For The Soul
I spent the first three days of the New Year on retreat. It was everything a retreat is supposed to be. It was restful. It was challenging. It helped me to heal and gave me insight for more healing in the future.

We spent a great deal of time in silence. Each day began with a 20-minute contemplative sit. We were given two or three minutes of silence to quiet ourselves before each presentation and to absorb what we’d just heard after presentations.

Each of these silences started and ended with the striking of a chime. The simple pure sound pierced the air.

As the retreat wore on and we spent more time in silence the more I longed for these silences. Each time I heard that simple chime my body/mind/spirit knew exactly what we were doing — and loved it.

Taking It Home
The hard part of a retreat is going home and integrating this peace, reflection, and grounding into your daily life.

As we waited for the closing session to begin I was thinking of how I could bring this sense of grounding into my daily life.

The first thing that came to mind was that chime. I thought, “I could buy one of the chimes and use it before and after my own silent time.” But I immediately saw the flaw in this plan. I’d end up buying the chime and I might use it once or twice, but eventually it would end up as one more knickknack on my shelf.

Then my mind wandered to prayer traditions throughout the world that use the bell as a call to prayer.

The Annoyed Monk
A friend of mine is a monk who lives in an abbey with other members of his community. Several times a day the bells ring and they are required to drop whatever they’re doing to join the community in prayers.

He explained,

“At first, it can be really frustrating.  You can be right in the middle of an important task and you have to just stop.  It is the worst when you are really in the grove.  It can make it really hard to come to the chapel with a prayerful mind set when you are frustrated like this.

“But something happens when they ring the bells again calling us to prayer, you close your eyes, take a few deep breaths, and bring yourself present to the Glory of God in that moment.

“The frustration just melts away because you are grounded in the bigger picture.  You realize it is good that you have been pulled away form the daily tasks for a few minutes to put it all in perspective.”

My Call To Silence
That is what I wanted in my daily life, but I didn’t want to move into a hermitage to get it.

Since I spend most of my day sitting in front of my computer I decided to write a computer program that would chime every 15 minutes as a reminder to re-ground myself.

At first, like my monk friend, I was a little annoyed by the constant interruption. But I decided that I needed to give it an honest effort.

Initially I was very strict with myself. The moment the chime rang I stopped what I was doing, even if I was in the middle of typing a sentence or a word. I‘d close my eyes and do a simple grounding exercise that took less than sixty seconds.

The results were amazing!

Being Fully Present
In those few short seconds of taking pause I was able to refocus.

I found myself clearing stress that I wasn’t even aware was there.

I was able to put the tasks at hand in perspective.

I was more productive and focused in my work, and at the end of the day I felt great, not exhausted.

Then My Friends Ask For One
I told my friend Christi, who was on the same retreat, about the software program I had created and she said, “I WANT ONE!”

Within an hour of sending her the program she sent an e-mail saying:

“The first time the chime went off it was a little surprising because I had my speakers turned up too loud, but now I love this.  It is such a great way to break up the day.  I feel so much more grounded already.”

“Hey, I want one too!”
The more people I told about the program the more people were asking for one as well.

Before sharing it with others I decided to improve the program. I recorded a much more peaceful chime. I also made it so you can set whatever interval of time you would like between chimes.

Since this is a brand new product I am offering it for over 50% off the eventual price.

For the next two weeks I’m offering the Breathe Easy Reminder software for only $7.45. (The regular retail price will be $14.95).

(And yes there is a both Mac and PC versions.)

But that's not all!
If you order as part of this special introduction I have three free amazing free bonuses:

Bonus #1: 60 Seconds To Presence: 9 Exercises & Meditations That Can Be Done Anytime, Anywhere In Under 60 Seconds ebook ($17.49 value)

It is one thing to take pause every fifteen minutes through out your day, but it is something completely different to use that time to really ground yourself.  When you ground yourself you are less stressed and more present to the moment. Grounding yourself is not a complicated task.  You can do it in less than sixty seconds.

In this book I teach you 9 different grounding activities you can do in less than 60 seconds. This book contains my favorite techniques using EFT, Qi Gong, guided imagery, breathing exercises, and movement meditation.  You can choose a new one each day or find the one you respond to best to use over and over again.

Bonus #2: Anchoring Relaxation audio ($13.77 value)

There is a very powerful tool in NeuroLinguistic Psychology (NLP) called “anchoring”.  When using anchoring you are able to attach one emotion or motivation to another piece of stimulus.  In stop smoking work the feeling of “I am now a non-smoker and will be a non-smoker for the rest of my life” is anchored to the color red.  When the person sees the color red it reinforces this belief.  (Red is everywhere so they are re-reminding themselves of this over and over again all day!)

In this very special audio the feeling of relaxation and healing is anchored to the sound of the chime in the Breath Easy Reminder program.  After listening to this audio your body will be automatically disposed to the feeling of relaxation at the sound of the chime.  As the program runs through out the day on your computer you will be relaxed over and over again.

Bonus #3: Total Relaxation audio ($13.77 value)

In this audio I use my 10 favorite relaxation images and stack them one on top of another.  By doing this it takes advantage of a phenomena we refer to in hypnosis as “compounding”.  When you follow a suggestion of relaxation by another suggestion it multiplies the first.

By building one on top of the next it multiplies the relaxing and stress relieving power.

Look at what Jay wrote me after using the audio:

“The Total Relaxation audio is so powerful it took me two weeks before I knew how it ended because it put me right to sleep each time I listened to it.”

This audio is a prefect way to end a hectic day.

That is $45.03 in bonus!
Each of the bonuses by themselves are worth more than double the special introductory price of the software.

The three bonuses combined are worth more than SIX times the price of the software.

100% Iron Clad Guarantee!
I have seen the power of this little program.  As I said above I wrote the program at first just for myself.  I was looking for a way to create some grounding in my own life.

This has worked beyond my wildest dreams.

If you don't find that this program doesn't make you more grounded and calm as you sit at your computer I will refund your money AND you can keep the three bonuses as my gift to you just for trying it out.

You have nothing to loose but your stress and lack of grounding!
The program is so easy to use that including download time you will have it up in running in less than 2 minutes.

You know you want to bring peace and grounding to your day.

Bring a moment of peace right now!

And 15 minutes after that…

And 15 minutes after that…

(You get the idea!)

Order now!

http://eftqanda.com/store/remind.html

Peace and grounding,

Gene

PS: Image what it is going to be like to have your day punctured with peace, relaxations, and the feeling of being grounded.  You can have that feeling right now…and it takes less than sixty seconds to feel it.

Let The Subconscious Fill in the Blanks

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photo by Adam Holloway

The most common reason my clients don’t do their EFT homework between sessions is, “I don’t know what words to say. When I tap with you it is so easy. When I’m on my own I get stuck.” But there is a way for the subconscious to solve this problem for you.

The reason may be lack of confidence, worry that you’ll do it wrong, worry that you’ll waste time, or that you simply don’t know how to approach the issue. At other times we may have a hard time saying some of the phrases out loud because they seem so ludicrous.

For example people who have a hard time believing they are worthy of being loved are not going to feel comfortable saying, “I deserve love, happiness, and well-being” because they really don’tt believe it.

It can be equally hard to say out loud (or even recognize) why we feel this way.

Rob Sherwin (http://www.tap4health.com/) has come up with a brilliant way to deal with the situation where we don’t know why we feel some way or it’s really hard for us to say out loud. His recommendation is to simply let the subconscious mind fill in the blanks for us. We could tap on something like this:

I don’t deserve healing because…
I don’t deserve to heal if it means…
I don’t know how to heal because…
If I heal then I will be stuck with…
I can’t heal because…
I am afraid to heal because…
I don’t want to heal because…
I don’t believe I deserve happiness because…
I don’t believe I deserve success because…
I don’t believe I deserve love because…