Our working lives can be stressful. The last thing we want to do is bring that stress and worry home. Here is a great little tapping technique that you can do every day before you leave work that will only take a few minutes. It will ensure that you leave any work stress behind so you can go home and enjoy the rest of your evening.
Archives for February 2012
The key to tapping is finding a way to emotionally tune into the issue at hand. It’s a cliche, but a picture really is worth a thousand words and they can be used to connect with emotions and root causes quickly (and without words). In this short video I show you how to use photos in the healing process.
Hi! This is Gene Monterastelli, the Editor of TappingQandA.com and welcome to another Tapping Ninja video. We call them Tapping Ninja because they’re super powerful like a ninja strike but they’re really quick and they’re really simple.
Today, what we’re going to do is we’re going to talk about a technique that I was first introduced to by Marie Holliday of EFT Spain, and it’s a very simple photo technique.
As we know, when it comes to tapping the most important thing we can do while tapping is tune into the issue. Now we can say phrases to do that. We can do imagining to do that. There are lots of different ways we can do it, but we just need to find a way to tune in. They say a picture is worth a thousand words and when it comes to tapping, this is really true.
When we take a look at a picture, what we’re going to do is we’re going to tune into all the emotions we have about what’s in the frame. And so what this can do is it can be a really powerful way to tune into an issue without struggling to find the words. All we need to do is take a photo, look at the photo and start tapping.
Now, we can do this in a number of ways. One, we can take a photo of ourselves either how we are currently or how we once were, and just look at the photo and stare at the photo and gaze at the photo and appreciate what’s in the photo and move from tapping point to tapping point.
If any emotions that we have about how we look today or how we look then or how we don’t look today like we did back then, it’s going to come to the surface and as we tap from point to point we’re going to find our way to relief.
Second, what we can do is we can take a photo of somebody else. Someone who there’s an emotional charge around, be it anxiety, feeling of overwhelm, sadness, loss, missing, whatever it is, just stare at the photo and start tapping.
It could be a photo of someone who is a loved one at a time in our life where we had a good relationship with them and we don’t have that today. Or, it could be a time when the relationship was really tumultuous and when we see them in that time, in that space, it brings up an emotional charge.
We just hold the photo up and we move from tapping point to tapping point to tapping point. Again, we don’t have to say anything because the emotions are going to come flooding forward. It’s a really simple thing to do. All you need to do is find a picture. When you’re done, put the picture down and move on.
For Tapping Q and A, this is Gene Monterastelli. I’d encourage you to check out all our free instructional videos by going to TappingQandA.com/video. And also make sure you check out the other 400 free resources we have on the site.
photo by Justin See
We all have them…
A list of tappable issues that we just never seem to get around to tapping for.
Some of the issues are really big and others are teeny-tiny.
At this moment I don’t care why you aren’t tapping for them; that is a conversation for
You can do some work on them without having to deal with specifics AND do it right now before any other resistance pops up.
Get a pen and piece of paper. Name the issues you don’t want to tap on.
Make a list.
Don’t think too much.
Just make the list.
Write. Write. Write.
If you are reading this you are not writing…add 3 more things to your list.
Re-read your list.
Take a deep breath.
And tap on this:
Some day I am going to tap on these things…Right now I am not ready…I might be worried about what I am going to unpack…I might be worried that I don’t have enough time right now…It might not feel right at the moment…I might not know where to start…I might not know what the root issues are…I might need to work with someone else to clear these issues…but there is a reason that I am not tapping for these issues right now…I give myself permission to know it is ok not to tap for these right now…Some day I will get to these things…When the time is right…I know that I don’t have to tune into them right now to have some of them start to resolve themselves…I give my system permission to start to work them out on its own…I give my system permission to let me know the right time to do this work…I give my system permission to work on these issues without me having to pay attention…my system knows how to heal…and it has permission to do just that…I don’t need to know about this healing…It can just happen on its own…I know that tapping will help these issues some day…that might be today…it might be later…I am easy with myself in knowing I don’t have to do it right now…I will get to these issues
Take a deep breath.
Feel better? Good!
What are the issues you struggle to tap on and why? What are some of the ways you get past your resistance? Click here to add your own thoughts and comments or read what others have to say. I would really love to hear what you think!
I want you to imagine you are meeting someone for the very first time. They know nothing about you. You have to describe yourself to that person, but you can only use one word descriptions.
Which words would you use?
Father, wife, grandson, teacher, loving, hopeful…
The labels we give to ourselves can powerfully influence our behaviour. In this interview I chat with Brad Yates about the positive and negative identities we create and how we can use tapping to transform the way we see and define ourselves.
Guest: Brad Yates
About Brad: Brad has had the privilege and pleasure of working with a diverse group of clients, from CEOs to professional and NCAA athletes, from chiropractors and psychiatrists to corporate and federal attorneys, from award-winning actors to residents at a program for homeless men and women in Santa Monica. For several years he taught a weekly class using EFT and guided imagery at Sacramento Drug Court. He has also been a presenter at a number of events, including several International Energy Psychology Conferences and the Walk On Water (WOW) Fest in Los Angeles. He has presented at Jack Canfield’s Breakthrough to Success event, and has done teleseminars with “The Secret” stars Bob Doyle and Dr. Joe Vitale. He is also the co-author of the bestseller “Freedom at Your Fingertips,” a featured expert in the film “Try It On Everything” (along with Jack Canfield, Bob Proctor, Dr. Norman Shealy and Dr. Bruce Lipton), and has been heard internationally on a number of internet radio talk shows.
Sometimes we won’t tap because we think an issue is too big. Or we feel like we can’t make enough progress to make worth our while. When tapping sometimes doing just a little is enough to make a big difference.
In this short video we look at how easy it is to make space for the healing process by doing a little tapping.
This is Gene Monterastell, the Editor of TappingQandA.com and welcome to another instructional video.
Today what I want to do is I want to talk to you a little bit about being open to change and transformation. I think one of the misconceptions we have or one of the reasons why we don’t sit down to tap is because we believe we need knockout the entire issue when we sit down. And that’s going to create some resistance because I might not feel that I have enough time to clear out the issue today. Or, it might feel like the issue is so big that there’s no possible way I’m going to get through it all in one sitting therefore I’m just not going to do it because it’s not going to feel like its successful. But that’s not true.
Any progress we make with tapping is important because its going to move us forward and its going to make it easier for us in the future so as we go forward, there’s going to be less of impacting as every single day and its going to make it easier the next time we sit down to tap for it.
The other thing that’s important to consider is the fact that we don’t need to open ourselves to change forever. By simply opening ourselves to change for a small amount of time, it can move us forward in really profound ways.
I don’t need to be fearless forever. I just need to be fearless long enough to make that one phone call I need to make in order to move my business forward. I need to be fearless enough to confront the person at work who’s been given a really hard time. I need to be fearless enough to make one simple small action that will create a cascade of effects so we move forward.
And so when we recognize this, when enables us to do is it enables us to sit down and spend a small amount of time tapping knowing that if we clear a little bit, its good, and if we just open the door a little bit, it’s going to make it so we have space to make a new choice.
So the beginning, a tapping round like that and you can tap with me. It’s as simple as this. I give myself permission to know that as I tap today, I’m not going to knockout the entire issue. I give myself permission to know that as I tap today, everything might not be cleared up and that’s okay. I give myself permission as I tap today to know that I’m simply trying to clear enough resistance and enough fear to make one small step to move me closer to my goal, the outcome I want. And if I do this, I know that I’m going to be closer to my goal when I started and its going create a cascade and a domino effect of actions that are going to lead me quickly to where I want to be.
I don’t need to do it all at once. I don’t need to do it all right now. I don’t have to do it in a profound way. I simply have to be open to allow a small of healing right now which is going compound itself through my day and every single time in the future when I sit down to tap.
And it’s really that simple. If you open yourself up to the fact that a little transformation is enough to make big things happen and enough tapping right now is better than no tapping right now and its going to make a huge difference in the way you move forward.
For Tapping Q and A, this Gene Monterastelli. I want to encourage you to check out all our free instructional videos at TappingQandA.com/video and also check out the hundreds of other free resources we have. Have a great day!
photo by Hans Splinter
[Note: This is part 4 of a 5 part series. When all five parts are published you will be able to find them at Talk To The System.
When we are learning the basics of tapping we are taught the more specific we can get the more effective the tapping is going to be. This is not only true for specific issues, but also specific parts of the system. I was inspired by the exercise I call “The Grounding Process” to look at each part of our system and tap for it. ]
Sometimes we need to talk to our spirit. Sometimes we need to listen better, more closely, and more often to our spirit. For me the struggle is just needing to be still enough to listen.
Here is how I tap when thinking of my spirit (remember to take a deep breath):
I love the fact that I am soul…I need to remember that I am not a physical being with a spiritual life…I am a soul that is having a physical experience…This is something I forget all the time…I need to find time to just sit and be connected to my soul…It is always there…It is always the still small voice of inspiration…It never leaves…It never shuts up…But it rarely shouts…It is quiet…It is still…I need to create space to just listen…Not to listen for instruction…Not to listen for inspiration…But just to be…To be still with my spirit…My soul is not in a rush…I can learn from that…I can be in this moment…Knowing it is enough…Be still…Be still…Be still
I asked some my friends and fellow practitioners what they wanted to say to their soul and what they need to hear from their spiritual self. Take another deep breath and tap:
I am a beloved child of an amazing God. I believe this to be true but sometimes at the deepest core of myself I don’t trust that it is really true for me. I believe that maybe it is true for others but not for me because I’m too much of a mess and failure. Keep reminding me that I am a beloved child of God.
Sometimes this world and our personal situations can cause us to feel hopeless, helpless and dispirited. Remember “This too shall pass”, and that life consists of constant cycles of change and growth.
You are not alone. You know exactly what you are here to do and you are doing it – with honor and integrity. You are always provided for, and you are always guided. Stay connected to the Divine and your way will be made clear.
Rev. Anne Presuel
You have permission to be part of my daily life…I know I forget you are there…It is not because I don’t care…it is because I forget…Please remind me you are there…Please remind me that I am a beautiful creation…Please remind me that I am made for love…Please remind me that I am worthy of love…Please remind me who I am…Please remind me that I need not be in a rush…
I call upon my eternal soul to remind of the most important truth…the truth that lets all my stories about my traumas, pains, wrongs and wounds fall aside as simply “stories”. Because my soul knows that I have never been broken, never been wounded, never been unloved, abandoned or hurt. I call upon my soul, my spirit to remind me that I am whole, eternal, loved and holy.
Margaret M. Lynch
“Thank you for never giving up on me. I was one stubborn customer, yes?!”
“Even though I don’t always hear you, I trust that you are always guiding me.
Even though I don’t always know my purpose, I trust that you do.
Even though I sometimes rush and don’t connect with you, and take you for granted, I savor the moments when I slow down and my deep connection to Source flows easily through you.
Even though it’s taken me a while to connect with you, I’m so grateful to know you.
“Quit being afraid.
Quit being afraid to love yourself. Quit being afraid to let your ego die. Quit being afraid to serve other people. Quit being afraid to let other people into your heart. Quit being afraid to be, learn new things about yourself, the world, and God.
My spirit will one day make its way by to my creator. When that happens I want to melt into the divine the way I was meant to:
All is possible.
What are the things your spiritual self needs to hear and what do you need to hear from you spiritual self? Click here to add your own thoughts and comments or read what others have to say. I would really love to hear what you think!
There are times when we find ourselves caring for someone who is going through something major, be it a physical or mental issue. We want nothing but the best for our loved one, but we can end up spreading ourselves too thin. We give everything we have to the point that we are harming ourselves.
It is important that when we are caring for others that we take the time to also care for ourselves. If we don’t take care of ourselves we can’t care for others. In this interview I talk to Ron Ball as he shares his personal story of what it is like providing long term care for a loved one and what he learned about taking care of himself during that time.
Guest: Ron Ball
Contact Info: EFT Zone
Bio: After working for years as a vice president of marketing in the super-stress world of high technology, Ron Ball set out to find a solution to help busy executives and employees to both relieve stress overload and improve their health and well being.
In his quest, he discovered a breakthrough method called EFT. Some people call it tapping or acupuncture with your fingertips instead of needles. Emotional Freedom Techniques is an elegant, simple and powerful method anyone can learn for managing stress, worries, pain, and health issues. In fact, he recommends that people try EFT on everything.
Ron has received both the Basic EFT and Advanced EFT Certificates. He is also publisher of the well-respected blog on EFT, www.EFTzone.com. He is co-author and publisher of the EFT book, Freedom at Your Fingertips: Get Rapid Physical and Emotional Relief with the Breakthrough System of Tapping.
Ron Ball has had an eclectic career, proving you can do whatever you set your mind to. An entrepreneur, Ron is a professional speaker, author, trainer and EFT stress expert. In his work life, he’s also been a professional photographer, syndicated radio broadcast interviewer, copywriter, and business executive.
Tapping can be used in lots of different ways. One way we can use it is to tap before we eat to promote better digestion, more enjoyment of our food, and a great sense of gratitude. In this short video I explain how to use tapping before we eat.
Hi! This is Gene Monterastell, the Editor of TappingQandA.com and welcome to another Tapping Ninja video. We call them Tapping Ninja because they’re like a ninja strike. They’re super powerful but they’re really short and sweet so you can add this to your tapping routine and make a huge difference right away.
Today, what I’d like to talk about is three different ways that we can tap when we approach the food that we eat. Now, when it comes to tapping for food, I like to do this in three parts. Number one, I’ll take the food, I’ll stare at it. I’m going to simply move through the tapping points. I’m just going to concentrate on the food. I’m going to notice what’s on my plate and what we found is that this is a really effective way to clear any sort of energetic substance sensitivity you have for what you’re about to consume.
And the nice thing about doing it by staring at the food you’re about to eat is, you don’t have to know everything that is on the plate to be able to tap for it. Your system is completely tuned into what’s there because it’s now in front of you and when you tap on it, you’re going to find your way to creating some clearing so that as you consume the food, the system is not going to overreact to what it’s ingesting.
Number 2, I like to tap in a way where naming the intention that I have for the food that’s in front of me. For me it’s a simple as this. I’ll just tap on the side of the hand then I’ll say, may this food feed my dreams and my hopes and not feed any of my worries and fears. It’s a really simple statement but what it does is it just helps to get my entire system on board for what’s about to happen. I want this to nourish me. I want it to help me to move forward. But I only want to do it to the things that are beneficial to me.
Finally, I like to do a round of thanksgiving tapping. And you can do this for anything but I like to do it on food in front of me because all things that are seen is gift, are seen in His creator. So by simply taking a few moments and tapping on the fact that we appreciate that we have food before us, that we get a choice of food, that many had a hand in bringing it to us and its going to allow us to move forward and will change our disposition about what’s in front of us. We’re not going to consume it super quick without thinking about it. We’re more likely to savor it and it will change our disposition about the food. And anytime we think of things in terms of thanksgiving, it’s going to position us so that we’re in a better mood to move into our day or anything that comes after that and beyond.
So three simple things, one, just stare at the food, notice what’s on your plate and move to the tapping routine. Two, name what you’d like the food to feed. And three, give thanks for the fact that it’s there. If you do these three things before a meal, you’re going to find the meal much more enjoyable and much healthier.
For Tapping Q and A, I’m Gene Monterastelli. Make sure you visit TappingQandA.com/video to check out all our free instructional videos and check out the site for all of the other amazing free resources.
Question: I would like to use visualization and law of attraction principles with my tapping. How can I do that?
[NOTE: I have a feeling this article is going to ruffle a few feathers. The science cited is far from definitive, but very interesting. I would love your feedback on this so please let me know your thoughts.]
The tool that is cited the most in the LOA community is visualization. “If you can see it, you can be it.”
Personally, I have always been a little skeptical. I fall much more in line with what Tony Robbins is credited with as saying about visualization: “If you sit all day in your living room thinking about what you want, something will show up. It will be the repo man!”
In my mind visualization alone has never been enough. If it were every teenage boy would be dating a Playboy bunny (something they spend a great deal of time visualizing very emotionally).
Action is required.
The Science Of Visualization
One of the reasons I love science so much is because the attitude is, “You think this is true? Great! Let’s test it to see if it really is so.”
To that end, a number of scientists have been putting visualization to the test. Four of these studies were featured at Forbes.com and what they found was that visualization in terms of just seeing what you want, actually makes it less likely for you to get what you want.
As the article states:
During the course of four experiments, Kappes and Oettingen demonstrated that conjuring positive fantasies of success drains the energy out of ambition. When we imagine having reached what we want, our brains fall for the trick. Instead of mustering more energy to get “there”, we inadvertently trigger a relaxation response that mimics how we would feel if we’d actually reached the goal. Physiologically, we slide into our comfy shoes; blood pressure lowers, heart rate decreases, all is well in the success world of our mind’s making.
The research also uncovers that the more pressing the need to succeed, the more deflating positive visualization becomes. One of the experiments tested whether water-deprived participants would experience an energy drain from visualizing a glass of icy cold water (a simple but elegant study design) and found that indeed, in even something so basic, the brain responds as if the goal has been reached.
From a “proof is in the pudding” standpoint, the research showed that participants told to visualize attaining goals throughout the course of the week ended up attaining far fewer goals than a control group told they could mull over the week’s challenges any way they liked. The positive visualizers also self-reported feeling less energetic than the control group, and physiological tests supported their claim.
That is a “WOW!”
Does That Mean We Stop Using Visualization?
In a word “No”!
What these studies point out is that just being in the moment and feeling what we want can be a harmful tool. It makes us feel better in the moment but it makes us less likely to take action.
But this not the only way to visualize. There are actually ways to use visualization that are very helpful. The key to using any tool is to ascertain how it can be useful in removing the things that are holding us back from taking action, and how it opens us up to opportunities to lead us to our goals.
There is a very simple way to do this and tapping will super-charge it.
Four Step Visualization Process Combined With Tapping That Works
There are a few things to keep in mind when looking at these four steps.
First, you don’t have to do them in the order they are presented and you don’t have to do all four steps in any one tapping session. As you will see each of these steps is set up to clear out different blocks to action. Clearing just one area is going to move you to a place where taking action is even easier.
Second, when doing each of these steps tap, tap, and then tap some more. Tap six or seven times on each point and then move to the next point. As you do each of the steps you are going to be tuning into the limiting beliefs and emotions that need to be tapped on. If we are tapping whilst these are surfacing we will clear them.
Third, for this to work you are going to need a clear vision of what you want and why you want it. There are many ways to write goals. I have a way that I think works best, but it is not the only way. Choose the way that makes the most sense for you.
Fourth, depending on the goal not every step is going to bring up every emotion and belief listed below. The ones that need to surface are the ones that will surface.
Step 1: Imagine Someone Else Achieving The Goal You Want
Task: In your mind imagine what it is like to witness someone else living the goal that you want to achieve. Imagine what their daily life is like as they have this goal. Imagine how they feel, imagine what they achieve, imagine what they feel as they achieve, and imagine the obstacles they encounter (AND how they get past these).
Goal: Doing this type of visualization can surface three types of emotions in us.
First, any jealousy that we have towards the people have achieved what we want will surface. Often the best resources we have to getting to our goal are the people who have already achieved something similar. If we are jealous of them it will be hard for us to look at their success from a distance and learn from it or, if we have access to the person, be able ask them for information to help to get ourselves to the same place. Our jealousy will shut us out from many resources we could use to take the right action.
Second, any emotions of inadequacy that we feel about the goal will start to surface. Thoughts of “That is right for them, but I could never have that!” If we don’t feel worthy or deserving of a goal then we will stop ourselves from taking the action that will lead us to achieving them.
Third, any negative beliefs we or others might have towards this type of success will surface. For example we could be doing this type of visualization around financial success. We might see someone who is very wealthy treating those around them with disdain and contempt. If we believe that rich people are mean then we will prevent ourselves from taking action to reach this goal because we don’t want to end up behaving the same way.
Step 2: Imagine Yourself Living The Goal
Task: This is not the “feel good and happy” as you imagine you are doing this. We are not looking to have warm fuzzy feelings while doing this. We are also not courting negative feelings. Instead, we want to feel realistically what it is like to have this goal happening in our life. How does it feel? What is exciting, frustrating, overwhelming, and impossible? Pay attention to all the emotions that come up. (Remember you are tapping while you do this.)
Goal: By realistically feeling (both good and bad) what comes along with the goal we will find our way to feelings of inadequacy, unworthiness, and overwhelm. We also might find emotions of “if we succeed we can lose it”. It is very hard for us to take action when we don’t think we are worthy of the goal. By tapping on these emotions we are removing the block of thinking that it is impossible, making action more possible.
Step 3: Imagine You Know How Others Feel About Your Success
Task: This step is exactly like step two, but in step three we are going to add everyone else in our lives. As you see yourself living the goal also imagine that you can read the minds and hear the whispers of others as you enjoy success. Are they supportive, jealous, or saying how much you have changed? Are they feeling sad about their own lives or overwhelmed because your success is pointing out their failure? Obviously you have no idea what others are thinking, but just make a guess.
Goal: There are times where we will hold ourselves back because of what others might think about us.. I once had a client report “I know how my fat friends talk about my skinny friends. If I lose weight they will say the same horrible catty things about me.” If we think our success is going to hurt our relationships or how people see us in negative ways, then we will prevent our own success.
By imagining what others are saying and thinking about our success we are going to be able to name (and clear) the blocks that are holding back our action.
Step 4: Imagine Encountering Obstacles
Task: Imagine all possible roadblocks and obstacles to you achieving your goal. Imagine the things you don’t know how to do. Imagine the people you ask for help saying “no”. Imagine your plans not working out. Imagine having everything go to plan and still not have it work out.
How do you feel when you imagine these scenarios? Keep playing them out in your mind. Now that something hasn’t worked out what is your next step or next plan of attack. Did that work? If not, in your imagination try something new.
Goal: One of the types of visualization that Kappes and Oettingen recommend from their research is to imagine that we are facing different obstacles and roadblocks. By doing this we have the opportunity to practice responding to things that didn’t work out. Instead of falling in a heap on the floor because it didn’t work out, we are training ourselves to respond to changes of plans. We are getting a chance to deal with the emotions of rejection and failure when the stakes are very low. So that when obstacles come up (and they are going to come up) we are going to be emotionally prepared to deal with them.
The time is now. You need to do something. You can’t sit around imagining things and expect them to show up at your doorstep. You need to know what you want, know what is going to stop you, clear yourself emotionally, and TAKE ACTION! Otherwise you are just daydreaming. Take some time each day and work these steps and you will start moving towards your goals.
Let me know what you think of this in the comments below.
There is a lot of talk about the idea of what we manifest in our lives, both positive and negative. I personally think that we pay too much attention to manifesting and attracting and give nowhere near enough credit to personal choice and response. In this conversation with my friend Jondi Whitis we talk about what we can control, what we create, and what we are responsible for.
This is just one point of view and I would love to hear your thoughts on the topic.