Tapping Q & A with Gene Monterastelli - Get the most out of tapping and EFT

I Don’t Deserve Healing

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One of the biggest struggles in our process of growing and changing is the fact that we don’t often believe that we deserve healing.

We believe:

  • We have too much
  • We have done too much wrong
  • It is too late

Sometimes it is just a deep ache that we can’t explain, a feeling that we don’t deserve any better.

I often use the image of a brick wall when dealing with this general sense of not deserving better. We are standing on one side of it, and our healing is on the other side. As long as we believe we don’t deserve healing we won’t get past the wall.

When we don’t know the root cause of the feeling it can be hard for us to approach because we are unsure where to begin or what to say. In these cases I imagine using Evolving Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT/EvEFT) like a hammer and chisel. We might not be able to take the whole wall down in one tapping session, but bit by bit we can make progress.

Here is some sample tapping patter you could use:

There is part of me that doesn’t believe I am worthy of healing…there is a part of me that doesn’t believe I deserve any better…for some reason this part that doesn’t believe I deserve this is trying to protect me…it truly believes this protection is in my best interest…this part of me is working very hard to protect me, but it is doing it in a way that is not helpful for me in the short or long term…I recognize this part of me that is trying to keep me safe…I know this part of me is working hard…I thank this part of me for working so hard…even if it is preventing my healing…I honor the fact that this part of me wants what is best for me…I give this part of me permission to let its guard down…it no longer has to work so hard…I deserve to heal…I deserve better…I deserve to heal…as I say those phrases there is a part of me that recoils at this thought…even though part of me doesn’t believe this, there is a part of me that knows it is true…right now I tune into the part of me that knows I deserve to heal…the part of me that knows I deserve better…it might be very deep down inside…it might be a very long time since this part of my being has been accessed…but it is there…right now I speak light and love to the part of me that knows I deserve love…to the part of me that knows I deserve healing…I deserve love…I deserve healing…I deserve better…whatever part of me is blocking this thought and idea, I let go of it right now…I see and feel the blocks to knowing I deserve healing melting away a little at a time…with each breath and each tap I am removing the wall of undeserving that prevents me from moving forward…it’s melting away…in every moment I believe more and more that I deserve to heal…that I deserve better…I forgive myself for not believing this is true…I forgive myself for not believing this is true even as I tap right now…I forgive myself or whatever part of myself has built this wall…I know it has only done so because it is doing the best it can with what it has to protect me…I give myself permission to believe it is possible to see myself as deserving of better health…I deserve to heal…I deserve better…I deserve love.
[How to use these tapping phrases]

Did you give up on your New Year’s Resolution today?

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When I was at the gym today for my morning workout I didn't have to wait in line for any of the machines, but everything was basically full.

When I went to the gym three days ago I had to wait 15 minutes to use one of the machines.

The reason why?

New Year's resolutions!

Everyone makes them…and no one keeps them.

If you made a resolution to loose weight or exercise this year on New Year's Eve then on average today or tomorrow is the day you will give up on that resolution.

You might not know you have given up on the resolution yet, but you have given up.

This morning you might have said something like, “It was Monday morning and that is why it was so hard to get to the gym today.  I will do it tomorrow.”

Or…

“I have been so good so far this year that I am going to reward myself with a little treat.”

You feel like you are on the right path, but you are not.

BUT, it is not your fault.

Because of there nature New Year's Resolutions are destine for failure.  

Why Resolution Fail
The idea of New Year's Resolutions is great!

We reflect on our life.  We see the areas we would like to improve.  We commit to change.

In order to do this we need to make new choices (like eating healthier and exercising more) and create new habits.

This is where the problem lies.

To create a new habit it takes 21 days.   This is because that is how long it takes to create the new neural path in your brain for the new action.

That means on will power alone you are going to have to make the right choice for 3 weeks.

That is the reason most New Year's Resolutions fail today.  We are running out of will power.

A different approach.
It is possible to make these changes without having to have super human will power.

Instead of fighting your urges it is possible to take those urges away.

Instead of feeling like it is punishment to go to the gym it is possible to make exercising something you enjoy and desire.

By dealing with the emotions that underlie the current behaviors it is possible to make lasting change.

I have created a special 5-session program that will make change something that is not only possible, but natural and easy.

The New Year's Program That Really Works
This program is not a teleclass (with lots of other people on the line).  Instead, this is five one-on-one sessions where we will deal directly with where you are in relationship to your body and your diet.

We will do a session every two or three weeks to make sure we are not just doing a quick fix, but are making long term changes.

Here is just some of what will happen in these five sessions.

  • We will discover the reasons that you emotionally eat and clear those emotional blocks
  • I will teach you kill craving in under two minutes
  • I will teach you a technique that you can use in under two minutes a day to return your metabolism back to functioning optimally.
  • I will teach you what to do before you are tempted so you re not fighting off major cravings.
  • We will get you motivated to do the exercise that you want to do.
  • I will teach you how stress is related to mindless eating how you can combat that in just a few minutes a day.
  • We will clean up the core issues that are causing you to mindlessly eat.

ALSO, I am going to record each of the sessions for you, so you can go back and listen to the tapping sessions again and again.

This stuff works!
Here is what some of the people who did the program is the past have said

“Still haven't eaten sweets since our last session!!! Thank you a million.”  This was referring to a session 4 months earlier.

Here are two e-mails from the same person that came 24 hours apart:

“It worked!  I went to two dinner parties last night and both had fresh warm rolls, and I only had one at each, and it wasn't hard to resist AT ALL!  And they didn't taste as good as usual.   I'm so excited!”

“I was wrapping gifts today and adding four of my favorite candies to the bags and only had two pieces, and they weren't that good, even though we only did a tiny bit of tapping on that.  And I swear my jeans are fitting quite a bit looser.”

I also know it works from experience
Not only am I working this program with clients I have been working it myself.

You would not look at me and think I am out of shape, but as I approached my 35th birthday I decided I wanted to be in the same shape I was when I graduated college.  My goal is to lose 20lbs.

I have a January birthday and it seemed like folly to try to loss weight over the holiday season.

This year Christmas week I attended three holiday parties, had a huge dinner with my family Christmas Eve, and a huge brunch Christmas Day.  The entire holiday there was sweets on the counter in the kitchen 24 hours a day.

This year Christmas Week I lost weight.

That's right, I lost weight!

I didn't do this by starving myself.  I didn't do it by fighting craving every moment of the day. I didn't do it by not eating any sweets.

Instead, I made easy choices about what I wanted and needed to eat.   I was in total control.

(I even made it to the gym everyday except Christmas Day when the gym was closed.)

I did it and you can too!

Special Deal
I am offering this special New Year's Program That Really Works for only $298.  

That is $127 (or 30%) off if you paid full price for these five sessions.

(OR if you prefer you can make three monthly payments of $114)

But That's Not All
In addition to the sessions (and the recordings of the sessions) I am going to give you 4 free Bonuses.

Bonus #1: “34 EFT Scripts that Help You Shed Weight and Love Your Body” ebook

This script book contains 25 EFT scripts to help you loss weight.  It is just like having an EFT practitioner on your bookshelf that you have access 24 hours a day.  (Value $49.95)

Bonus #2: “It is weight release, not weight loss” audio

Medicinal Intuitive Catherine Poole shares in this exclusive interview her experience of the metaphysics of weight.  As Catherine says, “When we lose something, we can find it again.  The process of getting the body we love is about healing and release.  It has nothing to do with loss.  It has everything to do with the healing we gain.”  (Value $14.95)

Bonus #3: “Spa of the Mind”

This is one of my favorite and best selling audios.  In this guided imagery audio you are lead through a process of letting go of the emotional blocks preventing you from healing.  You just need to sit back, listen, and feel the blocks to your healing melt away. (Value $13.71)

Bonus #4: Share the gift of EFT with someone else

Imagine you are at a holiday party with friends and family.  You hear the comments, “You look great.”  “I am amazed at your will power around all these sweets.”  “How do you do it?”  You can keep it a secret, telling them it is just will power, or you can tell them about the power of EFT.  For one of those lucky loved ones in your life you can give them the chance to experience EFT with a professional.  When you join this program you will receive one free EFT session to give to anyone in your life. (Value $85)

That is $161.61 in free bonuses alone, which is more than half of the price of the total program.  It is just like getting 5 EFT sessions for under $150 (less than $28 a session).

100% Money Back Guarantee
I know (because I have seen it in the lives of my clients) that EFT is a very powerful tool in helping you to make better choices about what and when you eat, help to motivate you t
o you exercise, and clearing the emotional blocks that are preventing your body from releasing the extra weight.

If after two sessions you are not satisfied that you are well on your way regaining the body you love I will refund your money in full.  

AND, you keep the audio and script book bonus as my gift to you.

There are only 6 spots
My spring is very full with travel, teaching, and working with clients.  For that reason I am only going to take on 6 clients for this comprehensive program.  Don't miss out.

Remember, this is your chance to take control before the holiday season even starts.

Sign up now!
http://eftqanda.com/store/bodyyoulove.html

This is your opportunity to regain control of your body and be health for 2009.  Don't miss it.

To a healthy new year!

Gene

PS: Image what it will be like when everyone else is complaining about failed resolutions knowing that you are in control and on your way to the body you love.

After A Powerful EFT Session

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I have found EFT to be a very powerful tool. I have used it to clean up a number of deep emotional issues, but have noticed a number of unusual sensations after doing a session. Sometime I am really tired after a session, while other times I feel a little more emotional than when I started but wake up the next day feeling like a new person. Are these common experiences? Is there anything I can do after a session to make sure I’m taking care of myself? Is there anything I can do to make sure the results of the session stick?

Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) is a very powerful tool, but as stated in the question there can be effects of doing EFT that go beyond just the issues we are working on. When we are doing EFT (regardless of the magnitude of the issue) we need to pay very close attention to the information our bodies and emotions are giving us.

Here are 4 basic things to keep in mind.

1) Knowing when enough is enough
Doing any sort of change work can stir up memories and beliefs that we are not ready to deal with. EFT is wonderful because it allows us to creep slowly up on problems, but there are times where we uncover more than we can handle on our own.

Also, there can be a point at which we have done as much healing as is healthy just then, having resolved only part of the problem. We might feel driven to soldier on because we’re not done with an issue, but we need to accept whatever stopping point is best for us.

Just because running 3 miles a day is healthy doesn’t mean running 100 miles a day is better. The body can only do so much before it needs rest. It’s the same with EFT. Just because there is more work to do doesn’t mean the body can deal with that work right now.

I had a client who was physically exhausted after just three rounds of tapping. He headed right to bed after less than 5 minutes of work.

Listen to your body…It will know when you are done for the session.

2) How to care for yourself after a session
There are lots of different ways the body can respond to an EFT session. Even when we work on the same issues, no two sessions produce the same effects in us. These feeling can range from light and euphoric to totally wiped out. Regardless of how we feel after a session there are two basic things we can do to take care of ourselves.

First, make sure you drink plenty of water. This is good advice even if you don’t do an EFT session, but it is especially important after doing EFT because we generally use and release a lot of energy. It takes time for our bodies to recharge. Water will help this process. You don’t need to drink so much that you float away, but it is a good idea to keeping sipping as the day unfolds.

Second, make sure you get enough rest. If you expend or release a lot of energy during an EFT session it’s a good idea to take it easy. You shouldn’t do anything that requires a great deal of energy, and you should make sure you get a good night’s sleep or even take a nap. As you will see in the next item, sleep can be important in the healing

3) The next day
When clients have a particularly emotional session I like to touch base the next day to see how he or she is doing. There have been times when we’ve done all we can do in a session, but my client is still emotional. When I touch base with my client the next day he/she is doing great. Many have described themselves as feeling like “a new person”.

When we are doing profound work it’s going to affect many parts of our life, not just the issue we are working through. The best analogy I’ve come up with is that it’s like doing a software update on our computers. Sometimes the changes are so fundamental to the way the computer works that the computer needs to be restarted for the changes to take effect.

I see a similar thing happening when we do major energy work. It takes a “reboot” for the changes to work through our system. This happens for us when we sleep. Scientists are still not completely sure why we sleep or dream. Many of the theories assume this is the time for our minds to sort out all the new data we’ve received throughout the day and integrate it fully into the body/mind/spirit.

The next time you do a major EFT session, either with a practitioner or on your own, pay attention to how you feel the next day. Even if you have a fitful night’s sleep, you will notice great changes beyond what you felt at the end of a session.

4) Getting it to stick
Sometimes we can find it very hard to sit down to do an EFT session. We know we will benefit from it, but something just keeps us from doing it. The reason is because in some fashion our issues benefit us. (See Getting Started) The same thing can happen after we do EFT. There may be something in us that resists the change working its way totally through the system (like discussed about) because something in us still sees benefits in keeping the problem.

I have found a very simple way around this problem. Tapping on it! (*wink*)

At the end of a session it is really easy to add some tapping phases like this:

I am so happy I had the chance to spend some time doing EFT…I am thankful that my body was able to reveal the areas that needed healing through my physical body and my emotions…I am thankful I found the time to do this work…I know over the next few hours and days these changes are going to slowly creep into every part of my life…the life, love, and energy that was opened up in this session is not going to just stay in this session…but is going to continue into my life….As my day unfolds I give my body permission to keep giving me information about the areas that need healing…I give myself permission to know this healing work is not over…I will have opportunities to do more work…Over the next few hours as these changes and healings become more and more real they are going to fill my life…tonight as I sleep I am going to have a restful night’s sleep…As I sleep these changes and healing are going to become more and more real in my life…My dreams will help me to sort out these changes to make them permanent…As good as I feel now…I am going to wake up tomorrow and every day of my life feeling better and better…As good as this feels…and it feels great…ever better things are to come…I am thankful for the chance to learn more and heal more [How to use these tapping phrases]

Peace (Personal and World)

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During the holiday season we are re-reminded that it is important to give thanks for the peace in our lives, homes, and world. We are also given the chance to consider the peace we long for. Please take some time this week and tap on these phrase to help bring peace.

I give thanks for the fact that I am reminded to consider the peace I have in my life…I am thankful for moments of peace…for people who create peace…and the people who call me to peace…I know there are places in my life that need more peace…I know I must take responsibility for creating that peace…that does not mean that I have created all the disharmony in my life, but I give myself permission to be responsible for the peace in my life…right now I tune into any block that I have to creating peace in my life…these might be big blocks…or they might be small…I know my body is holding on to these blocks for a reason…because it thinks these block are protecting me from something…I thank my body for holding these blocks…but right now I choose to let them go…any block I’m holding that prevents peace in my life…and in my world…I let it go now…knowing in this moment that I no longer need it…as I let it go I feel my body…I feel the freedom that comes with this peace…I forgive myself for carrying these blocks for so long…I love and accept myself…knowing I deserve peace in my life…and in my world…any part of me that feels I don’t deserve peace…I thank that part of me…because it believes it is protecting me…and I let these beliefs go…I deserve peace in my life…I was made for peace…I am at my fullest and my best…when I am at peace…I also know I desire peace not just in myself…but also in the world…I know I can help to create peace in the world…in my thoughts…my deeds…and my actions…I know it can be scary to step out…to take actions that will create peace…others might judge these actions…thinking I am a do-gooder…thinking I am being arrogant…thinking I am messing in places I shouldn’t be…I give myself permission to help create peace in the world…I give myself permission to be a peacemaker…the world needs peace…it is not just better for me…but better for everyone…when I create peace in myself…I create peace in the world…when I create peace in the world…I create peace in myself…Let there be peace on Earth…and let it begin with me.
[How to use these tapping phrases]

Not Knowing What To Tap On/Tapping To Help Getting To Sleep/Tapping For Relaxation

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There are times when I want to spend a little time tapping, but I don’t have a specific issue or I don’t really want to dive into a very emotional issue. Is there any benefit to just tapping with no particular intention? [Note: The example in this article on how to tap without words is a perfect way to tap to help you get a good night’s sleep or to just relax.]


photo by James Blann

One of the reason I love Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) is because it costs us nothing more than a little time to do. So even if we aren’t doing EFT in the most effective fashion we are just spending a few minutes thinking positively about our health and well-being.

Also, it is important to remember that if we are tapping while there is any sort of block in our thoughtfields while we are tapping (even if we aren’t consciously aware of it) we are doing work on it. It’s not the words we are saying but the thoughts that we have while we are tapping that make the change.

To this end I do some tapping every night before I go to bed in which I don’t think of anything in particular. I just let whatever needs to be bubbling up to bubble up on its own. I will either do this while taking a short walk or while listening to or watching something (podcast, DVD, or evening news).

A great deal has been written in the EvEFT community about which hand we should tap with or what side of the body we should be tapping on. (For my point of view on this topic, click here.)  To take advantage of the possibility that there is benefit from switching this up I tap in every possible combination.

The pattern looks like this:

  1. Take a long cleansing deep breath to clear my mind and relax my
  2. With my right hand starting on the top of my head I work my way down tapping on each point on the right side of the body until I have tapped on every point.
  3. With my left hand starting on the top of my head I work my way down tapping on each point on the left side of my body until I have tapped on every point.
  4. With my right hand starting on the top of my head I work my way down tapping on each point on the left (notice the switch) side of the body until I have tapped on every point.
  5. With my left hand starting on the top of my head I work my way down tapping on each point on the right (notice the switch) side of my body until I have tapped on every point.
  6. Repeat

I do this for about 10 minutes. It is very, very relaxing and puts me in a great place to climb into bed for a good night’s sleep.

Recently I have been experimenting with a slightly different approach to this tapping routine. I was introduced to it by Angela Treat Lyonin her blog. You would do the exact same exercise as explained above but would tap in the way she describes on her web site (which you should visit because it has lots of great stuff). She has come with something called Cascade Tapping.

I've used Cascade Tapping for hundreds of people now (both in live sessions and in my teleclasses), and I've found that this way of tapping helps take them from thought to feeling in seconds.

It's really very simple. Instead of jumping from one point to the next and tapping on each one 5 – 7 times, you move gently and gradually in little half-inch increments from one point to the next, only tapping on the incremental spots once (see diagram).

There are many variations and ideas about where to start, tapping but I like to start at the top of the head with very gentle circle of tapping, then trek on down to the third eye, and on down. No hard fast rules.

I'm finding that there's an almost instant yawn or sigh factor for anxiety and fear, in particular. I do it while I'm driving in heavy weather and am calm almost immediately.

Remember to be easy with yourself. Don’t feel like you need to accomplish too much with your tapping, knowing that any time you spend tapping is a small step forward to health and well-being. Our objective is not to be standing in the right place but to instead be constantly moving forward (even if it is only a little at a time).