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Tapping Ninja Video – The Emotion About The Issue

January 22, 2012 by Gene Monterastelli

Sometimes there is resistance to clearing an issue (physical, emotional, and limiting belief) because we are emotionally charged about the issue we are dealing with. We might feel disappointed in ourselves for dealing with this issue, or sad that our body has let us down. In this video we explore how to clear this resistance so clear the core issue is easer.

Click here to read what others have to say or add your own thoughts and comments. I would really love to hear what you think!

Video Transcript

Hi! This is Gene Monterastell, the Editor of tappingqanda.com and welcome to another Tapping Ninja video. We call them Tapping Ninja because they're super small techniques that are really powerful, kind of like a ninja's strike, something that you can stick in to your tapping arsenal super quickly will make a difference in the short and long term.

Today, what I'd like to do is talk about what I call the emotion about the issue. Now, we have tappable issues that can be physical issues, they can be emotional issues, they can be limiting beliefs. And we know how to tap about those things but sometimes it's hard to get to those issues because there is something on top of it. There's another layer that we need to deal with that’s preventing us from seeing what's going on. So, let's take an emotional example.

Let's say that a loved one has died and because as loved one has died, we’re really broken up and that makes perfect sense. It's natural to feel a sense of loss. But we might have an emotional response about the fact that we’re feeling lost. Because I am feeling so much loss it might be preventing me from helping my family members who are also going through loss and now I feel like I'm letting them down or I feel like the emotion is becoming so debilitating. Or I can be in a circumstance where I feel like, I need to be tougher than that and to show that much emotion is not where I want to be.

So now there's two emotions. Is the core emotion, the of feeling loss and sadness that goes along with it, and there's a secondary emotion, how I feel about that emotion. I'm letting my family members down.

When we have an emotion about an issue, it's going to be really difficult for us to deal with the issue at hand. So what we need to do is we need to deal with the emotion about the issue before we can deal with the issue. This will let us to see it much clearly.

So, if I was going to tap on an instant like this, first thing I'm going to do is I'm going to tap on how I feel about the emotion or the fact that I'm letting everyone down because I'm experiencing so much grief. Once I've cleared this external secondary emotion, it's going to make it much easier and much clearer for me to see the loss and the sadness so I can tap on it and be able to clear that out.

This can happen as well for physical issues. You know, I could be in a circumstance where my knees have been acting up and it's making it really hard for me to work. And so, my knee hurts and I want to tap on that issue. But the emotion about the issue is, my body is letting me down. My body should be working better so I can do all of the things I need to do. And so it's going to be really hard for me to tap on the physical pain and clear that until I first clear the emotion about the issue, the frustration I feel about my body letting me down.

Now, to add this into your tapping, it’s a really simple thing to do. Tune in to the issue at hand, again, a limiting belief, a physical issue or an emotional charge and simply ask yourself the question, how do I feel about the fact I'm experiencing this. Does it feel overwhelming? Does it feel like I'm failing? Does it feel like I'm letting someone else down?

If we tap on these issues first, what it's going to do is its going to make it really simple and much clearer for us to see the root cause that’s underneath.

So the next time you're going to tap on an issue, ask yourself the question after you’ve tuned in, how do I feel about the fact I'm actually experiencing this issue? Whatever comes forward, tap on that and clear it which will open the door for you to do some more powerful work on the root cause.

For Tapping Q and A, I'm Gene Monterastelli. I hope you come back and you visit one of our videos soon. Have a great day! Bye-bye!

Filed Under: Video Tagged With: Premium Member, Resistance, Tapping Ninja, Video

Things Your Intellectual Self Needs To Hear

January 20, 2012 by Gene Monterastelli

photo by Paul Downey

[Note: This is part 2 of a 5 part series. When all five parts are published you will be able to find them at Talk To The System.

When we are learning the basics of tapping we are taught the more specific we can get the more effective the tapping is going to be. This is not only true for specific issues, but also specific parts of the system. I was inspired by the exercise I call “The Grounding Process” to look at each parts of our system and tap for it. ]

I have the tendency to live in my head. I am very thoughtful person and am very capable of over thinking things. Because of this I can miss other information for other parts of my system. It is good to recognize our intellectual selves AND to help it to understand how it fits into the whole system.

Take a deed breath. Tune into your intellectual self and tap:

I am so happy that I have such a powerful intellectual part of my system…It solves problems at the speed of light…It assess situation before I have the change to realize that something needs to be analyzed…I love the fact that my intellect is able to learn and grow…My mind is made to grow and develop…I want my intellectual self to know that I know how much is does…And I am happy it is here…

I also want my intellectual self know that it is not alone…It is not the only part of my system…It is not the most important part of my system…But one more important part of my system…I want my intellectual self to know that it can and it needs to work with my other parts…That is needs to work with the wisdom of the gut and heart when making decisions…

I also asked a number of friends and fellow practitioners what they would want their mind/intellectual self to know and hear. Take another deep breath and continue to tap:

Let go, there's no need to keep such a tight grip on everything.
Pamela Bruner

Are you trying too hard? Does it feel like work? Stop.
Jade Barbee

I'm smarter than I think.
Tammy Evevard

“Gosh darn it you are smart. (chuckle).
I'm sorry that others misunderstand your brilliance.
You are really good at trying to keep me safe. However I have a new job for you now.
Thank you for giving me all sides of the options here. You've done a good job.
Thank you for being part of the team. Your role is very important.”
Deborah Donndelinger

Beautiful mind runs the show most of the time, thinking thoughts, thinking my life, thinking my feelings, remembering the past, projecting into the future and interpreting life through the thinking filter. I honor my brilliance AND i give my mind permission to let down, to slow down, to relax and let me FEEL into my body and life more. it's okay, brilliant mind, it's safe for me let go of some much thinking and analyzing and feel what i want…and from that place i am so much more inspired, creative and brilliant!
Margaret M. Lynch

You are smart. You are capable of incredible things. You can always figure things out. You know how to handle each situation as it comes up. You know exactly the right thing to say in each situation.
Rev. Anne Presuel

You are as smart as you needs to be. And while you may get in the way of decisions that might be best left to the ‘gut' to decide, I am grateful that I have my intellect to help protect me, reason things out, keep me safe, move me forward in life, remember the good things from the past and help me to walk into the future.
Lindsay Kenny

I spend too much time trying to prove to other people how much I know. The truth is I know very little. The problem is by the amount that I yammer on to other people you would never know that.
I am only 37 and I have a lot to learn about other people, the world, myself.
I need to say the words “”I don't know”” a lot more often.
There is a lot of excitement in not knowing about a lot of things. It means that I have a long way to go before I become enlightened. It means that I am unfinished and I have many mysteries of the universe to solve before I pass on.
How boring it would be to know everything before turning 40!
I must not allow my world to be so small. I need to open myself to learning as much as I can in the time I have left. I also must be ready to allow my perspectives to shift based on new experiences or information I learn. Don't become so deeply cemented into opinions or positions that I will never allow myself to change my mind.
Quit being afraid to learn.”
John Roedel

I have the capacity and talent, as well as the determination, to express all that it desires to express. That there is plenty of time and plenty of room for self expression. Mind, you don't run the show, but you have incredible things to contribute.
Rhona Clews

You need to relax and understand that in any one circumstance you only going to perceive a small percentage of what is really happening. The bigger picture is almost never available to just the brain. Chill out. Relax. Enjoy the ride to greater understanding.
Alina Frank

It is okay to be great. I choose not to limit myself – or doubt myself – for fear of what others might think if I excelled. It is better to excel and show others how to do the same.
Brad Yates

“At the end of the day, does it really matter what you forgot? Or didn't accomplish from that ridiculously long To-Do-List? What you remembered – and did – was really good enough? (Trust me.)”
Jondi Whitis

You are not me, you are something I use, you are very bright and very smart, but you work for Me.
Andy Bryce

What are the things your intellectual self needs to hear? Click here to add your own thoughts and comments or read what others have to say. I would really love to hear what you think!

Filed Under: Tools Tagged With: Alina Frank, Andy Bryce, Anne Presuel, Brad Yates, Deborah Donngelinger, Jade Barbee, John Roedel, Jondi Whitis, Lindsay Kenny, Margaret Lynch, Pamela Bruner, Rhona Clews, Talk To The System, Tammy Evevard

Pod #70: Recovering Self – A Healing Manifesto

January 18, 2012 by Gene Monterastelli

 

Recovering Self: A Healing Manifesto By Gene Monterastelli

A manifesto is nothing more than a statement of beliefs. This is what I believe about the healing process. This is not about tapping the tool, but what happens when we heal and transform. This is how I think when I am working with clients.

Who “Recover Self – A Healing Manifesto” is For:

This if for anyone who is interested in transforming their lives, healing past wounds, and people who are trying to understand how these process happen. If you want to understand yourself a little better it is for you.

What You Will Learn In “Recovering Self – A Healing Manifesto”:

  • Why you stop the healing process even when you know the steps you should take
  • Why others don't want you to heal
  • The two categories that all healing falls into
  • What you need to know (and what you don't need to know) to heal
  • How to stop fighting yourself and start healing

To download the ebook, the ebook in Spanish, or audiobook w/o podcast intro visit HealingManifesto.com

What do you think about this manifesto? I would love to hear your thoughts Click here to add your own thoughts and comments or read what others have to say. I would really love to hear what you think!

Filed Under: Podcast Tagged With: Advanced Techniques, Practitioner

TapAlong: Being Brave When Overwhelmed Or Tired

January 16, 2012 by Gene Monterastelli

There are times when we just don’t want to step up. It could be because we feel we have nothing left or it could be because we don’t think we are capable.

Woody Allen is famously quoted as saying “Ninety percent of life is just showing up.” Often all it takes is getting up and getting started. It doesn’t have to be perfect. Most of the time it doesn’t even have to be good. Just starting is enough. It gets the ball rolling and the juices flowing, and it gets us heading in the right direction.

Filed Under: Tap Along Tagged With: Overwhelm, Stress, Stuck

Warning: Ask These Healing Questions At Your Own Risk

January 13, 2012 by Gene Monterastelli

(For me) one of the basic tenets to all change work: If there wasn't some resistance to making change the change already would have happened.

Most of the time we know what we want and we know how to get it, but we just don't take the steps needed. Something is holding us back. In most cases, we know (or falsely believe) that something is going to go very wrong if we get the change we want.

Not that the change we want is bad, but it is also going to come with unwanted consequences.

For example:

  • If I lose weight my fat friends are going to make fun of me the way they make fun of other skinny people.
  • If get over my fear of public speaking they are going to expect me to speak more in my job which mean more work.
  • If I get everything done today then my family is going to expect me to get everything done everyday.

Finding The Resistance Is Scary

Most of the time we are not sure what these underlaying concerns are. Might have an idea, but we don’t know for sure.

We can find out what these resistances are, but it can be a very dangerous thing to do.

If we find out what the underlying resistance is then we have to do something about it. It is much more comfortable to say, “I would love to lose the weight, but my family has never been able to keep weight off,” than it is to recognize that you haven’t lost the weight because losing weight is scary.

When the world is conspiring against us then it is not our fault. When we name what is really going on then we are responsible to do something.

You Have A Choice

So you have a choice. You can continue to live in your blissful ignorance. You can continue to wish for better and be resigned to the fact that the world is against you and it will never happen.

Or…

You can ask the hard questions. You can face the ugly facts about your life and you can recognize that it is up to you.

I will give you a moment to make your choice.

If you want to ask the hard questions…read on.

  • What would people expect of me if I really did change?
  • What would I expect of myself if I if really did change?
  • What crutches would I have to give up if I really did change?

I know they are not revolutionary questions. I am sure you have read them before in other articles on resistance, but they are powerful, useful, and (to be honest) at times painful to ask.

3 Steps To Getting Past Resistance

Now that you have chosen to face the questions let’s do something really helpful with them to create change! You can do this in three simple steps.

1) Think of an area of your life you want to change.
Narrow this down, because the resistance in each part of your life is going to be a little different. You can repeat the process as many times as you like with as many issues as you like. Choose one thing to start with.

2) Ask the questions?
Do this one at a time. Give each question a few minutes. Write down each of your answers. When you think you are done force yourself to come up with two more.

3) Tap for each thing you have written down.
It I very simple just start tapping and say “Even though I am afraid that if I get the change I want I am going to have to deal with [insert something from your list] I love and accept myself’

Repeat step 3 for each thing you have written down. If you want to you can go through your list twice (or three times even).

Now It Is Time For The Healing/Change Work

Don’t be mistaken at what we have just accomplished. What we have done is cleared the resistance to making the steps to the change you want. Doing this isn’t going to magical de-clutter the kitchen, have 30 lbs. disappear over night, or get you up in front of the office staff doing stand up comedy.

What it does do is clear the space so you are no longer getting in your own way. It clears the space for you to take the steps you know you need to take to move forward, grow, and/or heal.

It is not time to take the action you have known you need to do…but fear not. It is no longer scary and you will want to do it, because you want and are worthy of the change it is going to bring.

What is your experience with resistance to change? Click here to add your own thoughts and comments or read what others have to say. I would really love to hear what you think!

Filed Under: Tools Tagged With: Fear, Goals, Resistance

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Meet Gene Monterastelli

Gene MonterastelliGene Monterastelli is a Brooklyn based tapping practitioner. In addition to working with individual clients and groups, he regularly writes and records about how to use tapping to move from self-sabotage to productive action.
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