Tapping Q & A with Gene Monterastelli - Get the most out of tapping and EFT

Pod #89: EFT For Shyness (Which Isn’t About Shyness) w/ Tania A. Prince

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Sometimes when I prepare for an interview I have a really good idea about what we are going to talk about. I am very familiar with the topic, the guest’s work, or both.

Other times I am caught off-guard (in a good way).

This is one of those interviews. In the first minute Tania Prince took my idea of shyness and turned it on its head. This set up an awesome conversation about what can be changed and what isn’t really an issue at all.

Often we confuse being uncomfortable around others which causes us to be quiet (AKA acting shy) with someone who is comfortable in a group of people and is just being quiet.

We can get ourselves into trouble when we try to change someone who is just quiet because we think that being shy is bad and that we need to pull them out of their shell.

This is a great interview with lots of tapping tips for dealing with discomfort around others and what being shy really means.

 

Tania A. Prince

Guest: Tania A. Prince EFT Master

Contact: web @ eft-courses.co.uk, e-mail @ contact page

Biography: Tania is an EFT Master, (one of less than thirty in the world). She has extensive experience of using EFT with clients and has worked on a vast range of issues, including fear of public speaking, blushing, panic attacks, success coaching, phobias, depression, addictions, anxiety, weight management, agoraphobia and serious illnesses, etc. She works from two clinics in Cheshire, England as well as working with clients throughout the UK and internationally via the phone. Her work has been featured on TV and radio shows both in the UK and abroad. She presents regularly at major international conferences and is a TAT Professionals Trainer.

EFT Beyond The Basic Tapping Points

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photo by Dawn Endico

I have a feeling that your experience with tapping has gone something like this…

You learned the basic tapping points. You’ve had some small successes when tapping with a teacher, a practitioner, or a friend.

You know tapping works because you have experienced it firsthand, but now you are not sure what to do next. You have the picture of someone with the tapping points marked on their body staring up at you.

But now what?

What issue to start with? What phrase to say out loud?

Because you are not sure and you don’t want to do it wrong you decide to try it again sometime later.

AND later never comes.

Not Knowing How To Do EFT On Your Own Is More Common Than You Think

What is described above is a very common experience. EFT is deceptively subtle. It is very simple to do. All you have to do is tune into an issue and tap.

The problem is there is a lot going on in an unspoken way.

To help you I have created some very simple tools that will help move from tapping with someone else to being able to tap on your own.

Each of these tools will either answer a very common question or give you slightly more sophisticated tools to use while tapping.

Think of this like taking your tapping training wheels off.

If you have questions that aren’t answered here, please let me know by entering your questions on the contact page.

9 Tools To Take Off Your EFT Training Wheels

Why Do I Have To Tap Anyway? – One of the most common questions I am asked is “Why do I have to tap? Shouldn’t the phrases be sufficient? Here is a quick explanation of why we need to tap and why the words aren’t enough.

Forget About The Words – It is very easy to get hung up on what words to say when tapping. This short audio will help you put the words you say in perspective by showing you how easy it is to come up with tapping phrases and that you CANNOT do it wrong.

How I Start Every Session – Sometimes starting is the hardest part. We have so many thoughts and feelings swirling around that we are not sure where to begin. Here is how I start all my tapping sessions. This will ground you and clear your head a little so you do not feel overwhelmed.

EFT Script Generator – Answer 8 questions about the issue you want to tap on, hit the button, and *poof* you have a tapping script. Just read it and tap along.

10 Simple Steps To Tapping For Any Emotion Or Issue – I think the title says it all. Follow these these steps and you are set.

Do I Really Have To Say “I Love And Accept Myself”? – Asking that question is kind of like saying “I really like riding my bike, but I skip all the uphill parts.” Sometimes the phrase “I love and accept myself…” is hard to say. That is ok. If we are tapping, on some level we are working on loving ourselves more. Here is a great little tool that will come up with over 2,400 alternative set-up phrases you can use when tapping.

Can I Tap To Change My Spouse, Children, or Co-Worker? – I am asked all the time if there is a way for us to tap to change the behavior of the people in our lives. The short answer is NO, but the long answer is SORT OF. This my favorite EFT tool ever!

When Unexpected Things Come To Mind – There are going to be times when you are tapping and something unexpected comes to mind. It might be a new emotion, a different issue, or something so off the wall that you have no idea where it came from. Here is what to do when unexpected things come to mind when you are tapping.

Tap Along Audios – Let someone else do the work. Here is list of over 35 free tap along audios. Pick a topic that you need to tap for, hit play, start tapping, and feel the relief.

Conclusion

Remember there is no wrong way to do tapping. There are tapping rounds that are successful and tapping rounds where you learn you need to try it in a different way. It is ok to tap in a way that is not perfect (because there is no such thing as perfect tapping). Give it a try with these new tools and each time you do it you will grow in skill and in confidence.

Pod #88: I Am Better At Teaching EFT Because Of My Time In Jail

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Since Feb of 2011 I have had the opportunity to be part of teaching an advanced anger management class to inmates in a local jail. I consistently describe the experience as “the coolest thing in my life.” It has been a really amazing experience and I have learned a lot from it.

I was lucky enough to be Jondi Whitis’ guest for the June episode of “eftTapFest” which is part of EFT Radio On-Line. In the conversation we talk about:

  • What I have learned about teaching EFT by teaching it in a Jail
  • What I have learned about creating a community to rally in support of one cause
  • What I have learned about stretching myself
  • What I have learned about crowd funding

Even if you never intend to work with inmates, write a book, or lead a community of support, there is a lot you can learn in this conversation.

Is It OK For Christians To Use EFT?

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photo by Gene Monterastelli

As you may or may not know, since 1996 I have traveled the US and Canada speaking and performing as part of APeX Ministries. APeX is a Catholic Christian performance ministry that works with teens and because of this I am frequently asked about tapping from a Christian point of view.

Here are my thoughts on the topic. Please be warned that I am not speaking for Christians, Catholics, or any specific denomination. These are my thoughts and my thoughts alone. I would love your feedback in the comment section below.

Instead of tackling the topic all at once here are the four most common questions I am asked about the topic.

Is EFT evil and/or does it come from an evil place?

EFT is a mechanical process. If you follow the steps it will work. Much like an aspirin it will work even if you don't believe in it. There have been over 50 peer reviewed studies for using EFT with stress, PTSD, and physical issues and it is probable that in the next 12 months EFT will be considered an evidence based technique (check out summaries of the studies).

Often the problem isn't with EFT itself, but when it is combined with things that are not evidence based. Here is my favorite way to explain this concept:

We know that vitamin C is good for our health. Let's pretend that because it is good for our health people decide to start using it for other things. They start adding it to their shampoo to deal with dandruff, they add it to lotion to improve their skin, they sprinkle it in the garden to help their crops grow, and they make earrings out of it to keep evil spirits away.

Just because people are doing wacky things with vitamin C it doesn't stop it from keeping us healthy during cold and flu season, but it becomes much easier to dismiss its usefulness when it when it is surrounded by things that are less grounded.

I love the fact that EFT is something that is so easy to access and share, but it comes with the drawback that everyone who presents EFT becomes a spokesperson for EFT. Some people do this in a highly credible way, while others are less successful. I find it so frustrating when EFT websites have things like dragonflies and butterflies on them. Yes, they are cute, but they don't present this powerful healing tool in a very professional light.

When working with EFT it is important that you work with people you trust and learn from sources that share your world view to ensure you are getting what you need and what is the best fit for you.

Can EFT be useful for my spiritual journey?

I have found EFT to be an extremely powerful tool in my personal growth. Many of the ways it has been helpful has been with my spiritual journey and spiritual life, which is easiest to illustrate through an example:

I believe that I have been created worthy of God's unconditional love. It is not something that I have to earn in any way and it is always there. My problem isn't in believing in God's unconditional love, but the fact that I prevent myself from fully acknowledging and receiving it.

I will hear someone say “God loves you unconditionally” and the little voice in my head will pipe up, “That is true for others but not you,” or “It would be true if you didn't do those horribly selfish things!” or “Maybe someday, but you are too much of a screw-up to be loved in that way right now.”

Even though it is true that I am loved unconditionally by God, I end up living as if that isn't true.

EFT has been a powerful tool in my life in uprooting the beliefs around feeling unworthy of God's love. As I remove these beliefs it makes it easier and easier for me to see myself as God sees me.

EFT is no replacement for spiritual practices, an active prayer life, or participating in a supportive loving community of fellow believers who encourage us and keep us accountable. It is one more tool that we can add to our regular practice to keep us healthy and facilitate our growth and healing in conjunction with many other tools.

What is the deal with “We are all energy”?

In my mind this a case of a little information being dangerous. The statement itself is accurate. Everything in the universe is energy. Einstein's theory of relativity concerns this fact. E = m c ^2 says that an amount of matter (m) multiplied by a really big number (c ^ 2 is the speed of light squared) is equal to the amount of energy of which it is made.

In layman's terms that means if we were able to turn the coffee cup on your desk into its pure energy form, it would be enough energy to blow the state of Kansas off the face of the earth. (Just because that is true, doesn't mean it is easy. If it were easy we wouldn't need oil to provide power, but that is another issue.)

The place that people start to go astray is how they apply what this means for us in an EFT sense. There are ramifications for this fact on a quantum level, but I am not smart enough to explain them (also at this point most of our quantum understanding is theoretical).

Most of the people who speak in this way are doing it terms of the “Law of Attraction” (LOA). If you would like my opinion specifically about LOA check out this conversation I had with Carol Look.

Just know that you can use EFT for physical and emotional issues without having to concern yourself with this approach or these issues. If someone is speaking in LOA terms and it makes you uncomfortable, then steer clear of their resources. It means they are not the right fit for you. It doesn't mean that EFT is bad.

What about when people talk about that we are co-creators?

Often times Christians have trouble with the term co-creator. It can feel like by making a statement like this we are putting ourselves on the same level as God. I don't believe this is the case. I use this term in two ways.

First, I am a creature who has been given free will. My life does not unfold unless I am exercising my free will by making choices. I create my own experience, but I am not doing this on my own. My experience is also created by the choices that are made by those around me, in both positive and negative ways. Someone in my life can choose to give me a new job opportunity or someone can hit me with a car. In both instances their choices are impacting the life I am creating for myself and in that sense we are co-creating, i.e. creating together, my experience. We don't have an equal sense of how much we are contributing to this reality, but both parts are creating it together.

Second, I believe part of my calling from God is to exercise my free will and to create a meaningful life. I can only do this because I have been given life, gifts, talents, and opportunities from God. Again, in that sense my experience is created in a combination of what God has given me and the choices I make, in other words a co-creation. This does not imply an equivalence between me and God, simply a working together.

Conclusion

I hope you find my reflections helpful. I am still on my own learning journey and don't claim to have all (or any) of the answers. I would love to hear your thoughts. Please add your thoughts or questions below so others can benefit from them, or drop me a note to let me know what is on your mind on the contact page.

Pod #87: EFT For Shoulders And Shoulds w/ Gwenn Bonnell

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In preparing for the podcast I usually exchange a few emails and do a pre-interview with the guest to figure out what topic we will cover and to create a plan for the interview so that it goes smoothly. When I was doing my pre-interview with Gwenn Bonnell I asked her what she wanted to talk about.

She said, “We could talk about shoulders and shoulds.”

I asked her repeat it because I wanted to make sure I heard her right. She really said, “shoulders and shoulds”.

I know many issues have a tendency to show up in the same part of the body over and over again, but I had never heard of the connection between shoulder issues and the things we feel we should do.

In this interview Gwenn does an amazing job of making the connection and showing us how we can respond with EFT.

Guest: Gwenn Bonnell

Contact Gwenn: web @ TapIntoHeaven.com; web @ TapAwayPain.com; email @ gwenn@tapintoheaven.com; phone @ 954 370 1552

About Gwenn: Gwenn is a writer, teacher and lecturer. She offers private sessions and training and workshops at Heaven On Earth in Davie, Florida. A graduate of the College of Health and Human Development, Penn State University, she is a member of ACEP, the Association for Comprehensive Energy Psychology, and has trained personally with Gary Craig (developer of EFT, Emotional Freedom Techniques), Dr. Larry Nims (BSFF, Be Set Free Fast), Tapas Fleming (TAT, Tapas Acupressure Techniques), Donna Eden and David Feinstein (Energy Medicine), Sandi Radomski (Allergy Antidotes), Alan Handelsman (Muscle Testing), Paul Burdelski (Touch for Health), and Piilani (Huna Kane).