Back in July I shared a tap-along audio for the shame of making a bad choice. I was overwhelmed by the positive response I received.
This week we go a little bit deeper in responding to the emotion of shame.
I hope you enjoy this tap-along audio.
Pod #183: EFT For Feeling Like You Will Be Judged For Being Different
Much of my client work revolves around helping people to take action. Most of my clients are trying to find a way to use their gifts and talents to help those around them in some way, but for some reason are holding themselves back.
This inability to act often stems from times in their childhood or more recent past where they were judged harshly by their loved ones for being different.
When this happens it makes perfect sense that they wouldn't feel comfortable using their giftedness in the present.
Today's podcast is a tap-along aimed at this exact issue. Even if you don't feel like this applies to you, you might be surprised how this type of experience may be impacting you subconsciously.
Take a few moments to tap along.
Pod #182: Matrix Birth Reimprinting w/ Sharon King
Even though we don't consciously remember coming into this world, we are fully conscious in utero and at the time of our birth. Because we are conscious, these experiences contribute to how we build models of the world that impact the way we live our daily lives.
In this interview Sharon King shares how Matrix Reimprinting (a tool set that uses tapping) can be used to help clear these unconscious memories.
Guest: Sharon King
Contact: web @ MagicalNewBeginnings.com/; twitter @SharonEFT; Facebook @ Sharon King; YouTube @ channel
About: Sharon has worked for a number of years specializing in the birth experience, and how it affects our emotional health during our childhood and adult life. She went on to develop the Matrix Birth Reimprinting protocols which became a foundational cornerstone in a self-help technique called Matrix Reimprinting and currently trains other practitioners worldwide. Sharon leads the field in this area, and her techniques are published in the book Matrix Reimprinting Using EFT, which is was released by publishing giants Hay House in August 2010 and she is currently writing her own book Heal Your Birth, Heal Your Life: Tools to Transform Your Experience of Birth and Create a Magical New Beginning.
Pod #181: Returning To The State Before Illness And Trauma w/ Jacqui Crooks
Our aim in tapping is to clear any trauma, events, or emotions in our lives that cause us discomfort, disease, or limiting beliefs. If it is true that we can pinpoint the moments that cause our issues, then it must also be true that we can find our way to a time in our system before these negative experiences.
Jacqui Crooks has developed a process which helps us to return to that original pre-issue state. Not only are we able to clear the issues, but also reclaim that happier, pre-issue state. In this interview she shares how we can access what she calls our original “blueprint”.
 Jacqui Crooks |
Guest: Jacqui Crooks
Contact Jacqui: web @ JacquiCrooks.com
About Jacqui: Jacqui is one of the pioneers in using Energy Psychology, finding EFT IN 1999. Her life's not been the same since! She is an international speaker and trainer and an EFT Founding Master. She specializes in helping people to change limiting beliefs and old family and ancestral patterns that create self-sabotage and keep people stuck. Her background is in Ericksonian hypnotherapy and NLP, and through the development of unique ways of combining EFT with hypnotic language and NLP Jacqui is able to help effect deep level changes quickly and easily without trauma. She runs retreats in interesting places and trains EFT, worldwide. She presents at conferences and is one of the authors of EFT and Beyond.
Even though there is a blueprint of the shining essence of me and I forgot that that is who I am, I deeply and completely love, accept and forgive myself.
Even though I forgot, I now gratefully accept help from my guides, helpers, angels, source, my higher self and all parts of me, to help and support, while cleaning, clearing and repairing all damage to my chakras, aura or any of my bodies, so that I return wholly to that shining, glowing essence of who I am.
Even though I forgot, I'm choosing now, to align to that blueprint of my shining essence and I ask that this is fuelled so that it continues, in ways that I don't need to know, continually clearing the connection to source, so that I can continue to shine and glow and completely fill that me shaped space in the universe.
Pod #180: How To Talk About The Science Around EFT w/ Craig Weiner
When we introduce EFT to others it can catch them off guard. Most people have nothing to compare tapping to, which creates lots of questions.
It can be frustrating to lack a clear and believable way to talk about tapping that is appropriate for newcomers.
In this conversation Craig Weiner shares how we can explain EFT to others in a helpful and understandable manner.
[Note: If you are interested the scientific research around EFT check out this interview with Dawson Church.]
 Craig Weiner |
Guest: Craig Weiner
Contact Craig: web @ EFTtappingtraining.com; web @ TappingOutOfTrauma.com
About Craig: Craig Weiner, DC has immersed himself in the field of Mind-Body Medicine for nearly 30 years as a chiropractor and EFT Tapping trainer/practitioner. Together with his wife Alina Frank, he trains individuals and practitioners/professionals in the Science, Art and Business of EFT for multiple certifying organizations. His passion for making neuroscience understandable and accessible, has led him to working collaboratively on multiple projects relevant to that purpose, including co-producing the upcoming film, “The Science of Tapping” and co-creating the very successful online course, Tapping Out of Trauma.
Pod #179: EFT For The Shame Of Being Wrong
I hate being wrong. I pride myself on making thoughtful choices and I work really hard to make sure I consider the best course of action and all the possible outcomes.
That doesn't mean that I expect myself to be perfect before I act (which is a different issue), but that I am really hard on myself when I make a mistake.
Especially a public mistake where others can see I messed up.
This week's podcast is about what comes up when we are dealing with the shame of making mistakes.
This is another example of me tapping for one of my own issues in real time. I hope you find it useful.
Pod #178: Trauma Busting Technique w/ Rehana Webster
EFT is a powerful tool for clearing trauma, but just because you know how to tap it doesn't mean that you have a clear understanding of how to tap for trauma.
Founding EFT Master Rehana Webster has created a systematic approach to tap for trauma.
In this conversation she shares the simple steps behind what she calls TBT (Trauma Busting Technique).
 Rehana Webster |
Guest: Rehana Webster, BSc, EFT Master, NLP Master
Contact Rehana: web @ http://TraumaBusterTechnique.com
About Rehana:Rehana Webster is the developer of TBT (Trauma Buster Technique- a mind body therapy for the elimination of PTS Symptoms). She is also a founding EFT Master and NLP Master. Her formal education is in biological anthropology from the University of Toronto, Canada
She is a well known trauma therapist and specializes in Post Traumatic Stress (PTS) resolution including GADs (generalized anxiety disorders) , OCDs (obsessive-compulsive disorders) and other behavioral issues. She has studied a range of mind-body energy therapies and developed TBT through a synthesis of NLP and Energy Meridians.
Pod #177: Responding To Repressed Memories / w Sophia Cayer
The human memory is incredibly complex. As our understanding of the workings of the brain grows it is increasingly evident that the human memory can be very unreliable.
Even when we have total confidence in a memory we could be mistaken.
On some level most people are aware that their memory is fallible. This can cause clients anxiety when what feels like a new memory shows up in a tapping session.
These may have been repressed or they may also be false memories.
In this conversation with Sophia Cayer we discuss the nature of memory and how to respond to a memory that might be false.
 Sophia Cayer |
Guest: Sophia Cayer
Contact Sophia: web @ SophiaCayer.com; web @ PersonalPeaceFoundation.org
About Sophia Cayer: An EFT Founding Master, Sophia has been devoted to a full-time EFT practice and teaching EFT for more than 12 years. Specializing in trauma and abuse, she is well-known for her ability to resolve core issues and, with EFT, for helping clients to reshape their lives and gain a level of comfort with their new “norm”. For more than 22 years she has been dedicated to helping clients define and generate the solutions to resolve challenges and achieve their goals.
Pod #176: EFT For How Others React To Us When We Make A Major Change
Over time we are going to change our minds. (At least, I hope I am changing my mind as I learn new things.)
And in a vacuum that seems like a good thing.
We are presented with new information and experiences. We re-evaluate the way we see the world and then we change our mind to think and act in a new way.
The problem is that we don't live in a vacuum. When we change our mind it doesn't only impact the choices we make, it also impacts the other people in our lives.
You might choose to leave a job, finish a relationship, or change the way you see God. When this happens the people in our lives may be impacted in practical or emotional ways.
Our loved ones may struggle because they have to change their understanding of who we are and how we see the world. They might not like our new choices or they might feel challenged by them.
In this week's podcast we tap for the difficulties around how others react to us when we make a significant change. This is also a great audio if you are struggling with a major change that someone close to you has made.
Pod #175: Being Busy Vs. Being Productive w/ Brad Yates
There is a difference between filling your time with tasks and doing the tasks that are most important.
As a way of keeping ourselves from doing the things we don't want to do we often we find ways to fill our time with tasks to keep us busy.
In the long term this is far from helpful!
In this conversation with Brad Yates we discuss how we distract ourselves with busy tasks to keep us safe from might go wrong with the productive tasks. We also talk about how we can tap for this to change the way we work.
 Brad Yates |
Guest: Brad Yates
Contact: twitter @EFTWizard; web @ TapWithBrad.com ; facebook @ facebook.com/BradYatesTapping
About Brad: Brad has had the privilege and pleasure of working with a diverse group of clients, from CEOs to professional and NCAA athletes, from chiropractors and psychiatrists to corporate and federal attorneys, from award-winning actors to residents at a program for homeless men and women in Santa Monica. For several years he taught a weekly class using EFT and guided imagery at Sacramento Drug Court. He has also been a presenter at a number of events, including several International Energy Psychology Conferences and the Walk On Water (WOW) Fest in Los Angeles. He has presented at Jack Canfield's Breakthrough to Success event, and has done teleseminars with “The Secret” stars Bob Doyle and Dr. Joe Vitale. He is also the co-author of the bestseller “Freedom at Your Fingertips,” a featured expert in the film “Try It On Everything” (along with Jack Canfield, Bob Proctor, Dr. Norman Shealy and Dr. Bruce Lipton), and has been heard internationally on a number of internet radio talk shows.
Are you looking for ways to stop being busy and start being productive? I have created an entire website design to help you. There are over 250 tap-along audios, tele-classes, and tools designed to help you move past your blocks and take the actions you want. Full details on Ruach Center.
Pod #174: EFT For Professional Jealousy
Last month I attended a conference as a delegate, which is not something I do often. I attend around 20 conferences a year as a speaker and only one or two as an audience member.
I loved the conference and learned a lot, but there were a number of occasions when I found myself feeling jealous of speakers teaching things I already knew.
I was jealous of the platform they had and the admiration they were receiving from the audience. I was jealous of their professional success.
Jealousy is such an unproductive energy. We become obsessed with outside forces, we feel sorry for ourselves, and we don't take action.
In this audio you will hear me tapping in real time for my jealousy of others and how I managed to shift it into a more positive frame of mind.
Feel free to tap along.
Scared of Change and Transformation Tap-Along
Pod #173: Working On Our Authority Figures Using EFT w/ Gary Williams
Something interesting happens when families get together where the adult children fall right back into the roles they had when they were 13 years old. (At least that is what happens in my family.)
This happens not only when a whole family comes together, but also within certain relationships. No matter how much growth we have gone through as an adult, we fall back into our old patterns.
In this interview Gary Williams talks about the stress that can be caused by the dominant personalities which ruled our responses as children and how we can tap for them.
 Greg Williams |
Guest: Gary Williams
Contact: web @ EFTHub.com;
About Gary: Gary Williams is the founder and creator of the EFT Hub. Whilst still at school he started interviewing and broadcasting as a hobby and later worked for a commercial radio network under the name of Andy King.
Gary developed an interest in therapies such as Stress Management, Reiki, Kinesiology, NLP and EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques). His passion grew for the therapy world and he decided to make a career change.
With more than ten years of experience using EFT/tapping Gary has brought many of the top professionals in the field into the EFT Tapping Hub to share their valuable insights.
Pod #172: EFT For Rejection
A few weeks ago I was at a conference in which Daniel Pink was talking about the sales process. One of the stories he talked about was a door to door brush salesman. He wasn't talking about someone from some bygone era.
He was talking about a man who in 2015 sells brushes door to door in the business district of San Francisco.
The salesman described his experience as “every day I face an ocean of rejection”. I couldn't imagine an daily existence like that.
Fear of rejection is a powerful force in not taking action in both our professional and personal lives. “No” can feel like the scariest word in the English language.
Today's audio is another example of me tapping in real time for an issue that I struggle with. Take the time to tap along with me.
Pod #171: The Heart Of EFT w/ Jondi Whitis
When it comes to using EFT effectively I think that Jondi Whitis is one of the best. She is insightful, deliberate, and so compassionate. (She is also a great trainer if you are looking to up your tapping game.)
Every year she hosts a wonderful event outside NYC called the Spring Energy Event. (You should join the mailing list and come along next year!)
This year she gave a talk called “The Heart Of EFT!” It was one of the most thoughtful reflections I could imagine on the healing process. As I was sitting at the sound board making sure everyone could hear her clearly my thought was, “I have to share this on the podcast!”
Jondi was kind enough to allow me to share her talk here.
Take your time to savor this, it will inform not only the way you tap and the way you work, but also how you interact with others.
It is good stuff!
 Jondi Whitis |
Conversation with: Jondi Whitis
Jondi's Contact: web @ EFT4Results.com;
About Jondi: Jondi Whitis is a certified EFT Master Trainer, Practitioner, Mentor and Board Member for AAMET International, delighting in creating practitioners of excellence. She’s passionately interested in refining and up-levelling core EFT skillsets, cutting-edge techniques, and training for practitioners and trainers worldwide, upholding the most thorough and professional EFT standards. She offers deeply personal, hands-on training to anyone interested in heart-centered healing, from children to teachers, parents to professionals, and for diverse communities worldwide, including veterans, Native Americans, teachers, healthcare professionals, and those who work with kids.
An ‘integration specialist’, Jondi enthusiastically guides each person to find authentic ways to integrate EFT into their purpose, professional practice and life. Join her in person, at the annual gathering just north of NYC, Spring Energy Event
Pod #170: What Phrases Should I Use For…
I love receiving questions from my listener and readers. They help me to understand what the community needs and how I can best serve you.
You can always ask a question here.
The question I get more than any other is “What are the right tapping phrases for [insert issue]?” (emphasis added)
I can understand where this question comes from.
When most people learn EFT they are taught to say words. When we see an expert practitioner leading someone else we marvel at the “perfect” phrases they use in the moment.
This leads us to believe that there are perfect and right phrases.
In reality this is not the case. There are phrases that are more useful than others, but there is no right and wrong.
In this audio I will teach you some of the ways I come up with tapping phrases that will make your tapping more effective.
The 10 Questions That Changed My Life
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Good morning, Last week I was having dinner with a friend I’ll call “Sally” at a place that serves the most amazing chicken and waffles. As we were enjoying dinner she explained that she was having a really hard time. She was in the middle of a move. Her job was stressing her out. She was thinking of changing careers. AND she had been sick for weeks. I was listening closely as caring friend. She stopped. Looked me dead in the eye and said, “I know you like to leave your work at work, but right now I don't need my friend Gene. I need Gene the coach. Help!” So I smiled, ordered another drink, and began to ask her some questions. It Only Took 10 QuestionsOver the next 45 minutes I asked her ten questions. With each answer she gave I repeated back what she had said in my own words and asked a few follow-up questions. At the end of 45 minutes she said, “Wow! You’re so smart. Thank you for helping me out with that.” The funny thing is, I didn't say anything smart. I didn't offer any advice. I didn't make any suggestions. I didn't help her plan anything. I simply asked ten questions and in the process of answering those questions she was able to see clearly what she wanted – and, more importantly, needed – the steps she needed to take, and the emotional blocks she needed to clear in order to be successful. These Are Not Random Questions
The 10 Question System (I know it’s not an awfully catchy name) is very powerful and something I use in my own life as well as with my clients. This system guides me when I’m trying to do something as small as reorganizing my office or something as large as creating a new product line. I Want You To Learn This SystemOn the surface this system looks super simple and that is because it is simple. BUT just because something is simple doesn't mean that it is easy to do at first. To that end I have created a training program that will walk you through the full system. Not only will you know the right questions to ask and the right order in which to ask them, but you will understand the motivation behind each of the questions. Once you master the why of each question it will stop being a formula and start to be something that you can integrate into your daily life as you make choices, as you are helpful to your friends and family, and can be integrated into client work if that is what you do. And it is not just ten questions! Each step along the way I teach you how you can tap for the information that comes up from each of the questions. You are not just figuring out what you want and need but also how to clear the issues that will (and always do) come up along the way. What Is In The Program?The system consists of more than 4 hours of audios which will teach you:
Bonus Tools To Help You Achieve Your GoalsThis system is great at uncovering the root causes for not taking action and the limiting beliefs that make it difficult for you to take action. I want you to be successful. I want you to achieve your goals. To that end I am adding four audio bonuses that you can use to knock out these common beliefs and fears:
That is $55 in free tap-along audios that you can use over and over again. Very Special DealThe system normally costs $189, but for the next two weeks I am making a special offer. In addition to the $55 in bonus tap-along audios you can get the system in one of three ways. 1) The Full Program: You receive the bonus audios and the full program for only $97. That is a 49% discount. Get It Now! 2) The Program + A Little Help: You will receive the bonus audios, the program, and one full hour working one-on-one with me to help you quickly knock out the stubborn issues uncovered by the system for only $197. That is an 89% discount on the program. Get It Now! 3) The Program + A Lot Of Help: You will receive the bonus audio, the program, and five one-on-one sessions with me. Imagine what it will like to have someone walking with you helping to clear out these issues. You get all of this for $787. When you do this you receive the whole system free of charge! Get It Now! Act Today!People just like you are taking control of their lives and taking the action that they want. Join them today. Don't miss this opportunity to transform the way you approach your problems. When you order you will be given instant access to all the downloads. Do it now: Yes! I want access to the system right now. Gene PS: The longer you wait to get clear the longer you are going to be stuck where you are right now. That is time that you are never going to get back. The sooner you take action the sooner you will have what you want. Order now! |
When Sally asked me to put my coach hat on I didn't just start asking her random questions, but instead I worked her through a specific process designed to move us from confusion, to clarity, and then to action.Pod #169: Clearing The Habits Created By Old Root Causes
Over the last few years I have noticed a pattern with a number of my clients. It would play out something like this…
- Client would come to me with an issue
- We would work to find the root cause
- They would have relief for a few weeks
- The symptoms would come back
- We would do more work looking for more root cause, but would find nothing
As I researched what all these clients had in common it turned out that all of them had come to me for an issue that had been with them a long time and the actions they were taking were no longer motivated by the root cause, but had instead become a habit.
In this audio from the 2015 Spring Energy Event I show you how this phenomena happens and 5 times you can do clear the habit created by root issues after you clear the root issue.
Pod #168: Is It OK For Christians To Use EFT
(Today's podcast is sponsored by PRM. Click the link to get 20% off your order.)
One of the reasons that EFT is so appealing is that it can be easily combined with other tools and modalities. In fact I know few people who do just EFT.
The problem with this for a newcomer to EFT is knowing what is EFT and what is the stuff that is added to it. This becomes even more complicated for Christians because it is often the other things that are combined with EFT that make many of them uncomfortable.
Most people who visit this site don't know that since 1997 I have traveled the US and Canada working in Catholic youth ministry with the group APeX Ministries. We have worked with hundreds of thousands of young people. We were even Pope John Paul II’s opening act in 2001.
Because of this I have had the opportunity to give a lot of thought to and have a lot of conversations about whether it is OK for Christians to be using EFT.
To be clear, I am not a theologian or am I an ecclesial minister (meaning I am not commissioned by or speaking for the church). These are the questions I am asked, the reasons I feel comfortable using EFT, and the setting within which I feel comfortable using it.
I would love to hear your thoughts and experiences.
The Problem With “I Should”
A few weeks ago in When You Explain Cause And Effect Wrong It Makes Your Life Harder I started with:
When I am listening to my clients talk about their issues I am not just listening for the meaning of what they are sharing, but I am also listening to the very specific words they are using.
The words we use to describe something will impact the way we understand a situation which then in turn impacts our emotional response to the situation.
The example I love to use is when my client “Deb” said “Everyone at work hates me!”
I asked, “Really, everyone?”
She replied, “No. It's really just Dave and Sue.”
You can see the emotional difference between “everyone” hating us and just two people hating us. (And that doesn't even get into if they really do hate Deb.)
Should, Shouldn't And Ought To
This week we are looking at another way in which we use language that leads us to respond to our daily experience in ways that aren’t useful. In this article we are examining the words “should”, “shouldn't” and “ought to”.
The problem with these words is that often we give them too much weight.
When we say should or ought what we mean is “it would be my preference to have” but on an emotional level it feels like “I have failed because I haven't.”
The same is true with shouldn't. What we mean is “it would be my preference not to have” but we feel it as “I failed because I did.”
Let's look at a few examples.
“I should have gotten more work done today.”
* What we mean when we say this: “In order to stay on track with this project I would have liked to have gotten more done today.”
* What we feel when we say this: “I have failed today because I don't live up to my expectations.”
“I should have been born in a different era.”
* What we mean when we say this: “Because of my world view and preferences my life might be more enjoyable if I had been born at a different time.”
* What we feel when we say this: “I am in the wrong time and this will always be painful for me.”
“You shouldn't be mad at me.”
* What we mean when we say this: “It hurts me that you are mad at me and you might feel differently if you have more information.”
* What we feel when we say this: “You are not allowed to feel this way and you are betraying me by doing so.”
You can see the clear emotional difference between what we mean and what we end up feeling. In all of these examples what we feel will have a much stronger (and often much less healthy) response to what is going on.
My Preference Would Be
When one of my clients uses a should, ought to, or shouldn't I generally ask a the question “What proof do you have that it has to be this way?” Often this is enough to help them to see they are turning an opinion or preference into a fact.
When you are doing work on your own and you notice you are use one of these words, try the simple step of replacing them with “it would be my preference”.
“I should have gotten more work done today” becomes “It would have been my preference to have gotten more work done today.” It is also helpful to ask the reason why. So this example now becomes “It would have been my preference to have gotten more work done today because then we would still be on track and I wouldn't be rushing around.”
There is still an emotional charge to that statement, but instead of feeling like a failure we feel a little rushed or overwhelmed because of the work we need to do. Even though the second emotion is also negative it is easier to respond to it in a healthier way.
Sometimes We Really Should Do Something
There will be some cases where using the word should is helpful and we don't want to make the substitution.
For example, “I should not embezzle money from my employer” is more accurate than “It would be my preference not to embezzle money from my employer.”
If you are looking for more resources about how to respond to the things you should do check out EFT For Shoulders And Shoulds where Gwenn Bonnell shares a simple tapping process for things you feel like you should do.