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Pod #53: Fibromyalgia w/ Rue Hass

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According to U.S. National Library of Medicine at the National Institutes of Health Fibromyalgia is:

a common syndrome in which people experience long-term, body-wide pain and tender points in joints, muscles, tendons, and other soft tissues.

Fibromyalgia has also been linked to fatigue, sleep problems, headaches, depression, anxiety, and other symptoms.

The cause of this disorder is unknown. Although none have been well proven, possible causes or triggers of fibromyalgia include:

  • Physical or emotional trauma
  • An abnormal pain response. Areas in the brain that are responsible for pain may react differently in fibromyalgia patients.
  • Sleep disturbances, which are common in fibromyalgia patients.
  • An infectious microbe, such as a virus. At this point, no such virus or microbe has been identified.

The following conditions may be seen with fibromyalgia or mimic its symptoms:

  • Chronic neck or back pain
  • Chronic fatigue syndrome
  • Depression
  • Hypothyroidism
  • Lyme disease
  • Sleep disorders

More and more I am seeing clients with these symptoms. In this interview I spend time with EFT Rue Hass talking about her experience with clients who are experiencing symptoms of fibromyalgia. We talk about causes as well things she has seen in her practice that has been helpful for these symptoms


Rue Hass

Guest: Rue Hass

Contact Info: IntuitiveMentoring.com, rue (at) intuitivementoring (dot) com

How Rue describes herself: When I first meet a new client/customer/co-creative partner, I walk them through an interesting process of understanding their life as a story. It concludes with asking them to consider what they want their life to leave in the world as a legacy. How do they want the world to be a better place for their having been in it?

When I contemplate this in myself, and ask, “What do I want to focus on in this phase of my life, as a culmination of everything I have learned and gained?”, what emerges for me is the concept of “spiritual eldering.” This impulse finds expression in my work with individuals and local groups, inviting and assisting people and communities to move into a sense of the real transformative power of their spiritual Presence in the world.

I particularly like to work with young people, adolescents and young adults as a mentor/coach. I have always been drawn to the kind of kid who might find him/herself in trouble in school, academically or socially, but who on the inside is bright, sensitive, perceptive, intuitive, often artistic or athletic, deep hearted and imaginative, and who just doesn’t fit the norm. I want to make it easier for these young people to find their place in the world. I think they are here to save it.

Links & Resrouces From Episode:

Round up – What is one thing you wish your clients believed about healing process?

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There is a wealth of information in the tapping community. From time to time I ask practitioners I respect their thoughts on tapping, healing, and their work. (I “round up” their opinions.) This happens about once a month. You can read past round-ups.

If you would like to check out my answer to this question (and more) you can download “Recovering Self: A Healing Manifesto“. (For free w/o having to sign up for anything.)

What is one thing you wish your clients believed about healing process?

That they are not victims of the process, but they are in charge of it. Once they understand that they are an integral part of the underlying process, they then start to use it more effectively and extricate themselves from being victims.
Ted Robinson

That sometimes it isn't a straight progression and every bump on the healing journey isn't a failure but more knowledge and insight about the problem.
Alina Frank

I believe that any belief that doesn't serve you can be changed. If I could get my clients (and the world) to believe that, I would be content with that as my life's work.
Pamela Bruner

You are designed as a divine being that has the ability to constantly renew themselves. Just like a wound on your skin, this is the regenerative process that occurs naturally, you want it or not.

Emotional wounds will not heal if they are not allowed to through remembrance of these with resentment, anger, fear and hate. If you inundate your soul with Love and forgiveness you will heal. Remember an emotion is not a fact,.. you can let it go.
Till Schilling

Don't judge the shift by the drama!

For whatever reason, some clients believe that they need a massive cathartic experience with lots of drama to change and heal. Yet, in the hands of a skilled practitioner, healing can be gentle, subtle and complete.
Rod Sherwin

That is worth taking time of your busy day to spend on healing. Even if you don't feel like it (or should I say ESPECIALLY when you don't feel like it). The longer you put it off, the longer you will feel unhealthy, unhappy or unfulfilled and there is absolutely no need for you to feel these negative emotions – you can heal. But none of the techniques will work unless you do them (or have sessions with a practitioner).
Mel

I wish they believed that it can be fun. It doesn't have to be deadly serious and earnestly heartfelt all the time. Humor is so healing in itself, and to mix it into any healing process is a total blessing. I have found that it really speeds things up. It goes against the common belief that unless the healing is a struggle, it's not worth much. I wished they believed that the healing process can feel good — because it most definitely can.
Janet Hilts

How would you answer this questions? Let us know!

FEAR! – 4 Questions That Will Help Us To Deal With It. (part 2 of 2)

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Where do I start with unbridled fear?


photo by Loretta Prencipe

I recently asked the members of Tapping Q and A Facebook Group what topic I should spend some time writing about. The first response back was “Where do I start with unbridled fear?”

In part 1 we looked at why we experience fear (and how that is not a bad thing). In part two we are going to look at how we can address the fear.

As we saw in part 1 fear exists for a reason, but often times it is responding to things that aren't truly dangerous (even though they feel very dangerous) or it is a response to things that might be dangerous but the reaction is excessive.

When this happens, because of the nature of fear, it becomes our predominant thought and this can become crippling. When I am starting to work with the emotion of fear there are four basic questions that I ask the fear.

[Note: For the rest of this article I am going to discuss the emotion of fear as if it had its own personality. I don't believe that each emotion has its own personality and I am not saying someone who is able to do this work has multiple personalities. You know what it is like to be of two minds. That is when you have two thoughts seemingly simultaneously that are opposite of each other. You can feel as if these two parts of your mind are in conflict with each other.

In this article we are going to deal with fear in the exact same way. I am going to talk as if we are going to have the conscious mind ask the fear for information. It is just simply easier for clarity sake to talk as if it is distinct. It isn't really separate.]

These are the steps I take to use these questions:

  • Take a deep breath and feel yourself grounded in the moment.
  • Start to tap. All you need to do is just tap 6-8 times on each point and move on to the next while you do the whole process.
  • Tune-in to the feeling of fear. You might do this by thinking of the thing, event, or experience that causes you fear. If it is more just an overriding feeling that is always there in the background then simply tune-in to how it feels in your mind and your body.
  • Ask the fear, as if you were asking another person, one of the questions from below.
  • Wait for information to come back. This information might come right away, while at other times it might take some time to come into focus.
  • If you get information that is unclear or incomplete ask for more information.
  • Use the information gathered for more specific tapping.

Let's take a look at the 4 simple (and I mean very simple) but powerful questions before we look at a few concrete examples to see how this works.

What are you afraid of?
This seems like a very straightforward question, but often times we are so caught-up in the feeling of fear that we are only feeling fear and not thinking about what we are actually feeling the fear about. This is also a very good question for the feeling of fear that just always seems to be there. When we are on-edge and just feeling dread all the time there is very little thought given to what the fear is about, so this is a great question to ask.

What are you keeping safe from?
The feeling of fear is all about danger. There is something out there that can be harmful. This question is very similar to the first but comes at it in a little different way. By asking what we are being kept safe from, this is a great way to find out what the direct threat is. It is important to keep in mind that this question isn't just about physical danger in the world, like a tiger attack. The fear could be trying to keep us safe from being embarrassed, not living up to our potential, or creating unrealistic expectations for our life.

What could go wrong?
Fear is always on the lookout for what is coming next. One of the main things it is looking out for is what could go wrong as we move forward following a certain path. If we ask the question, “What are you afraid of?” the answer might be speaking in public. When we ask, “What could go wrong?” and the answer is, “I am going to look like a fool in front of my boss,” we are starting to get to the core of the matter.

What proof do you have this is true?
Often times the fears we have are reasonable. It is reasonable that we might do a bad job giving a presentation at work and that we would look like a fool in front of the boss. But just because it is a reasonable possibility doesn't mean that it is probable. When we ask the fear the question “What proof do you have that this is going to happen?” one of two things are going to happen. First we might be presented with a past situation where things didn't go well. This gives us a memory that we can tap on. Second we might get, “Well . . . I don't have any proof at all. Many times just this realization (while tapping) that there is not real proof this will happen will help to discharge some of the fear.

When we are using these questions we are going to do it in a fashion that is not necessarily in the order that is listed above. One question will often lead us to another and then again back to the first. These are just tools to help you with the conversation that you are having with the fear. It might look something like this.

Question: What are you afraid of?

Answer: Something bad is going to happen.

Q: What are you afraid of that is bad?

A: I am going to be exposed.

Q: What are you afraid you are going to be exposed as?

A: Being exposed as a fraud

Q: What proof do you have that you are going to be exposed as a fraud?

A: I don't have any, but I don't know what I am doing and they are going to see that

Q: What will go wrong if they see you as a fraud?

A: They are not going to trust me in the future

Q: When you didn't know what you were doing in the past and they found out, how did it turn out?

A: Actually not too bad. When they found out I didn't understand something they created space for me to learn the skills I needed.

Q: Now that you know it is okay to not know everything, are you still worried?

A: Yes

Q: What are you worried about?

A: I hate not being able to do the job right the first time

Q: What is the penalty for not getting it done right the first time?

A: Because I would be a loser

Q: What proof do you have that you are a loser if you don't get it right the first time?

A: My father always said, “You never get a second chance to make a first impression.”

By taking the time to have a conversation with the emotion and by making sure that you take time to keep asking for more information, it is going to lead you deeper to the roots of the issue. If you are tapping while doing this question-and-answer process, you are going to be taking the edge off of the fear and then when you come to a clearly tappable issue (like the memory of the father in the example above) you go after that issue. After that issue is clear you start the process again seeing if there is any fear left. If there is, you simply start asking the questions of the fear again.

Pod #52: Self-Compassion w/ Rod Sherwin

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When I approached my friend and fellow practitioner Rod Sherwin about what topic he wanted to talk about in a podcast interview he recommended a conversation about self-compassion. At the time of the interview I was unfamiliar with the word. Self-compassion is in stark contrast to self-esteem. It is all about seeing yourself in the same way as you see others. Often we are supportive and understanding when others fail, but when we fail we are very hard on ourselves. Self-compassion is about being able to extend that same love and understanding towards ourselves.

In this interview we explore self-compassion in depth and practical ways in which we can incorporate it into our daily lives and our daily tapping.


Rod Sherwin

Guest: Rod Sherwin

Rod's Contact Info: web @ tap4health.com, e-mail @ rod@tap4health.com, phone @ +61 3 9650 0250, twitter @ rodsherwin; facebook @ facebook.com/Tap4Health; youtube youtube.com/rodsherwin; google+ Tap4Health

About Rod: Rod Sherwin, known as “the tapping man”, is an Energy Therapist from Melbourne, Australia. Rod runs the Tap4Health EFT Practice and works with clients all over the world on issues such as stress, anxiety, trauma, abuse, anger management, depression, weight loss, public speaking and presenting. Rod's approach is an unconventional and original combination of genuine warmth, respect, intuition, and skill.

Rod's primary tool is the Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) which he combines with his experience in Energy Medicine, Solutions-Focus Brief Therapy, 6-Human Needs Psychology, and Neuro-Associative Conditioning. Rod's original qualifications are in Computer System Engineering and Computer Science which gives him a very grounded and practical approach that focuses on getting real results.

Rod loves spreading the word about EFT and speaks to groups, small and large, including community groups, social groups, and corporates. Rod has lived in Melbourne for since 2005 and, while he enjoys the city life, he is originally from a small country town in North Queensland called Charters Towers.

Links & Resources From Episode:

My Favorite Thing My Clients Say During a Session & How You Can Use It To Accelerate Your Healing

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photo by Karen Eliot

I love working with clients. I have learned so much from them. When working with them my favorite thing for them to say is, “I know this has nothing to do with it, but…”

Before we get to that, let's take a step back.

One of the problems we face when working with an issue is we can get caught in our own story. It is very natural for us to want to know why we are the way we are. This can make it easier to manage what is going on. If we see a cause and effect, then it can give us an entry point to understanding how we can heal.

For example, I was working with a client who had a fear of snakes. When he was 9 years old his older brother threw a snake into his sleeping bag while he was trying to get to sleep. In this case it seemed very reasonable to start our Emotional Freedom Technique/tapping with that memory.

There are other times when the reason we feel the way we feel might not have anything to do with the issue we are working on. We might have an issue speaking in front of a group of people and we are convinced that the reason we have this issue is because when we were 8 years old everyone laughed at us during show-and-tell, therefore speaking in public is no longer safe.

It is perfectly possible that this memory is the root (or one of the roots) to the reason why public speaking is so hard. If we put ourselves in a position to believe that it is the reason for the issue, then we are going to spend a great deal of time on this one memory and not make any progress with our issue because it has little or nothing to do with the issue at hand.

This brings us to my favorite phrase that my clients say. We will be working along at an issue. We will take a moment for them to take a deep breath and consider the progress so far. Out of nowhere my client will say, “I know this has nothing to do with it but . . . ” and they will share a story, memory, or feeling about someone else that up to this point may seem completely unrelated to what we are working on.

The reason I love this SO much is because there is a reason that this came up now. When we are focused, our mind doesn't have a tendency to wander unless there is good reason. If my client says it has nothing to do with what is going on, more than likely it has everything to do with what is going on.

This does not mean that we need to abandon the path we had been following up to this point with the issue, and it does not mean that this new piece of information is the only piece of information that is important. It is just something that we need to pay attention to.

If you yourself or one of your clients are tapping on an issue and something comes up that seems to have nothing to do with the issue at hand, don't dismiss it. Instead, take some time to thoughtfully consider why that sort of issue would come up. Just because it has come to mind doesn't mean that it does in fact have something to do with the core issue that you are after, but there is a reason that it has come forward. If you don't know why it has come to mind just ask, “Boy, that is an odd thought. Why did that come to mind right now? What does this have to do with the issue at hand?” You might be surprised at the healing you and/or your client will be able to find your way to.