I recently asked some of my favorite tappers “What are the biggest mistakes made by beginning tappers?” Below you will find their answers. When everyone answered they didn't know what anyone else was saying. I found it very instructive to see the number of similar answers that were given by many people.
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Pod #99: EFT For Resentment w/ Gwenn Bonnell
Gwenn Bonnell is always one of my favorite guests on the Tapping Q and A Podcast because every time I talk to her I learn something new. This interview was no different.
In this interview we talk about how to tap for resentment. And this is not just about feeling resentment towards other people. We can also resent our computer for not working, a company for not being helpful, and ourselves for making the same bad choice again and again.
The interesting thing about resentment is that it is an emotion that bubbles below the surface so it isn’t always obvious to us, like anger or sadness. Because of this we can forget to tap for it because it doesn't feel like it is impacting our immediate present.
In this interview Gwenn shares a great 3 step tool to get to the core of resentment, and how to tap for it once you are there.
Guest: Gwenn Bonnell
Contact Gwenn: web @ TapIntoHeaven.com; web @ TapAwayPain.com; email @ gwenn@tapintoheaven.com; phone @ 954 370 1552
About Gwenn: Gwenn is a writer, teacher and lecturer. She offers private sessions and training and workshops at Heaven On Earth in Davie, Florida. A graduate of the College of Health and Human Development, Penn State University, she is a member of ACEP, the Association for Comprehensive Energy Psychology, and has trained personally with Gary Craig (developer of EFT, Emotional Freedom Techniques), Dr. Larry Nims (BSFF, Be Set Free Fast), Tapas Fleming (TAT, Tapas Acupressure Techniques), Donna Eden and David Feinstein (Energy Medicine), Sandi Radomski (Allergy Antidotes), Alan Handelsman (Muscle Testing), Paul Burdelski (Touch for Health), and Piilani (Huna Kane).
EFT To Stay Healthy During Flu Season
It has been one of the worst flu seasons in years here in the States. And even if you managed to avoid the flu, there were lots of colds and stomach viruses going around. Below is the tapping script I use when I feel a bug coming on.
You don't have to use the whole thing. Feel free to pick and choose the parts that work best for you.
Here is a downloadable pdf version of the script.
[Note: If you like this script I would encourage you to check MyEFTYear.com. This is the type of resource that shows up at least 4 days a week.]
My system is a powerful healing machine.
My system is made for health and well-being. I appreciate everything that my system does on unconscious and subconscious levels all day and night to keep me healthy and safe. I know my system isn’t perfect in doing this, but it is truly amazing in what is does.
I know that there are choices that I make that make it harder for my system to heal and grow. There are thoughts that I have, emotions that I feel, beliefs that I hold, things that I eat and drink, and choices that I make which makes it harder for my system to maintain optimum health. I apologize to my system for any of these that I have done, especially in the last twenty-four hours. I appreciate the fact that my system is willing to keep working towards my health and well-being.
There are many things that my system is holding onto that is slowing healing and growth. These can be in the forms of thoughts, emotions, beliefs, and substance in my physical body. Some of these are known while some are unknown or hidden. At one point the system thought these were helpful or still thinks they are helpful. I give my system permission to let go of anything that is blocking health and well being. If it needs these things in the future, I will be able to pick them up again. I give my system permission to let them go even if the system doesn’t understand what they are or why the system thought they were helpful at one point.
My system is a powerful healing machine. I give my system permission to release its healing power, not just now, but throughout the whole day and as I sleep tonight. I do not need to be conscious of this healing and growth. My system has permission to heal.
There are many systems in my body that do so many amazing things. There might be blocks and impediments to these parts working to their optimum potential.
I give my system permission to remove any blocks and provide to my body anything it needs for health and well-being.
I give my system permission to remove any blocks and provide to my digestive system for optimum health and well-being.
I give my system permission to remove any blocks and provide to my respiratory system for optimum health and well-being.
I give my system permission to remove any blocks and provide to my circulatory system for optimum health and well-being.
I give my system permission to remove any blocks and provide to my nervous system for optimum health and well-being.
I give my system permission and energy to remove any blocks and provide health and healing to my limbic system for optimum health and well-being.
I give my system permission to remove any blocks and provide to my glandular system for optimum health and well-being.
I give my system permission to remove any blocks and provide to my reproductive system for optimum health and well-being.
I know that as I move through the day I encounter many things that it is hard for my system to process or can be hard for my system to process. My system and my immune system do an amazing job of keeping me healthy as I encounter things through my whole day that are working against my health and well-being.
I want my immune system to know how much I appreciate how hard it works. I want my immune system to know it is not the only part of me that is trying to keep my safe and healthy. I give my immune system permission to access other parts of my system to ensure that I stay safe and healthy.
I give my system permission to heal and remove any known, unknown, and hidden obstacles that are preventing health and well-being.
I give my system permission to heal and remove any known, unknown, and hidden viruses that are preventing health and well-being.
I give my system permission to heal and remove any known, unknown, and hidden bacteria that are preventing health and well-being.
I give my system permission to heal and remove any known, unknown, and hidden fungi that are preventing health and well-being.
I give my system permission to heal and remove any known, unknown, and hidden ingestants that are preventing health and well-being.
I give my system permission to heal and remove any known, unknown, and hidden inhalants that are preventing health and well-being.
I give my system permission to heal and remove any known, unknown, and hidden contactants that are preventing health and well-being.
I give my system permission to heal and remove any known, unknown, and hidden injectants that are preventing health and well-being.
I give my system permission to heal and remove any known, unknown, and hidden emotions that are preventing health and well-being.
I give my system permission to heal and remove any known, unknown, and hidden memories that are preventing health and well-being.
I give my system permission to heal and remove any known, unknown, and hidden beliefs that are preventing health and well-being.
I give my system permission to heal and remove any known, unknown, and hidden darkness that is preventing health and well-being.
Did You Know You Aren’t Trying To Get Rid Of Emotions With EFT?
 photo by Kerr Photography |
A recent conversation with my client went like this…
Client: I am really sad because I am never going to get to see him again.
Me: Good!
Client: What do you mean good?
Me: It is good that you are mourning the loss of the friendship. It is important to mourn that loss. It’s healthy to recognize that the relationship was important to you, recognize the positive things it gave you, and acknowledge you are going to be missing something.
Client: I didn’t know it was OK to feel this way.
If you search the internet you will find thousands of articles and videos on how to get rid of emotions. When we are working on a negative emotion our the goal is often to get that emotion down to a zero on the SUD scale.
Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) is a great tool to use in responding to emotions.
BUT our goal with tapping is not to be emotionless!
Our emotions serve us. They give us information about how we are responding to what is going on around us.
When we feel angry it is because we perceive that we are under attack. When we feel frustrated it is because we feel like we want or need better. When we feel sad we are recognizing that we are missing something that is important to us.
The emotions themselves are not the problem. Emotions are only a problem when they spring from misinformation, or are disproportionate to the circumstance.
An example of a misinformed emotion would be when we get really mad at someone for not showing up to dinner when we didn't know they were involved in an accident on the way.
An example of a disproportionate emotion would be pulling over and crying for 45 minutes after we were cut off by another driver.
In both examples we experience the emotion because it is trying to convey information about our experience. The anger is there because we feel attacked because we were stood up. The overwhelm on the road came because there was a part of us that feared for our life. In both cases the emotion went too far and was too big.
We don't tap to get rid of our emotions, but instead to achieve balance and have them respond accurately and in proportion to our experience.
Many times when we tap we do release emotion completely because it has done its job and passed along the information needed.
At other times we will not get the emotion all the way to a zero and that is perfect because there are emotions we need to feel.
What are your thoughts on tapping for emotions and getting them all the way to a zero? I would love to hear about your experiences below.
Why Do I Always Make Change So Hard? How To Make It Easier With EFT!
 photo by mjzitek |
Why do I always make it so hard for myself to change? I know there is an easier way, but I always choose the hard way. Why am I doing that?
That is a direct quote from one of my clients this week. (Did you know you can work with Gene too?)
In my experience, there are two main reasons why my clients make things harder for themselves: value and worth.
Making Our Work Valuable
As a culture we attribute value to hard work to the point of making it a virtue. Whenever we talk about someone who is hard worker it is almost always a compliment.
“He is someone you want on your team. He is such a hard worker.”
“Wow! That was so well done. You must have worked really hard at it.”
There is nothing wrong with hard work. Working hard is a good thing, but it is easy for us to turn working hard into an end in itself. When this happens it becomes distorted from, “It is good to work hard,” into “It is only good if I work hard.”
When this happens we will intentionally choose the harder path because there is a part of us that now believes that only hard work is valuable. To address this we can tap to something like this:
I want to be a hard worker…I want to pull my own weight…I want to make sure I am contributing…But the best way to contribute is to add something that is valuable…Value is calculated by what I add…Or by what I receive…My value is not in how hard I work…There is an easier way…I am allowed to choose the easier way…Even when I do things the easy way…I am contributing…And my work has value…When I do things the easy way it takes less time…And that makes it possible for me to do more…When I have more time I can contribute in more ways…I can add more to my life…And I can take time to enjoy my success…It doesn't have to be hard to be good…It doesn't have to be hard to be valuable…
Making Myself Worthy
In addition to making our work feel more valuable we can also make ourselves feel more valuable by doing something that is hard.
We might think on a subconscious level, “Look at how worthy I am! I am struggling therefore I deserve to be here and to be noticed.”
If we think the only way we are worthy is if we work hard, then we will make sure that our work is hard in order to feel more valuable. When this happens we can tap to something like this:
I want to be seen as valuable…I want to be seen as worthy…There is a part of me that believes that if I am working hard…I have a reason to be here…I have a reason to be seen…I have value…There is a part of me that thinks…”Look at me…I am working so hard…I am struggling…Therefore I am carrying my weight…And I am valuable…I am worthy”…I am glad there is a part of me that wants to be seen as valuable and worthy…But I don't have to work hard…To be valuable…Or to be worthy…I don't have to work hard…I don't have to struggle…I can be good and do things the easy way…I am not cheating by doing them the easy way…I am not a cheater by doing it the easy way…I am making the best choice for me…
Conclusion
We don't have to make it harder than it need be. When we are able to transform the thought that things have to be hard then we can start to make it easier for ourselves. This will allow us to move forward more quickly and with less effort.
A final note: Often the idea that we have to work hard is given to us by other people, such as our parents and teachers. When working with this issue you might also want to look at how to let go the beliefs we have picked up from loved ones. These can be particularly hard to change because it might feel like we are disrespecting or letting our loved ones go when we let go their beliefs. Here is a simple process to release beliefs given to us by others.