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Things Your Inner Child Needs To Hear You Say

March 2, 2012 by Gene Monterastelli

photo by Tony Trần

[Note: This is part 4 of a 5 part series. When all five parts are published you will be able to find them at Talk To The System.

When we are learning the basics of tapping we are taught the more specific we can get the more effective the tapping is going to be. This is not only true for specific issues, but also specific parts of the system. I was inspired by the exercise I call “The Grounding Process” to look at each part of our system and tap for it. ]

We are not just who we are now, but a sum total of all that has happened. There are parts of us that are still clinging to the past as if it is still happening. Many times when working with clients we find our way to working with the younger self. Much of who we are today is informed by our younger years. BUT it is not who we are in totality and our past is not written in stone in such a way that it can never be changed.

I have found it very helpful to speak to my younger self. It is important to let it know that it is allowed to grow, change, and absorb the wisdom of my older self. This is how I tap for and with my inner child. Take a deep breath and just tune in to the younger you.

You are safe…There is no judgment here…You are allowed to share what everyou want…And you are allowed to share nothing…You are safe…There is no judgment of you here…There is only love…I want you to know you are not alone…You are safe…You are loved…You are allowed to think what you want…You are allowed to say what you want…You are allowed to feel what you need to feel…I am here for you…You are safe…There is no judgment for you here.

You are allowed to ask for what you need…It can be big…It can be small…It can be nothing at all…You are allowed to ask for what you need…

You have access to all the information and resources we have gained in our life…I have progressed so much in my life…I have gained wisdom…I have learned lessons…I want you to have access to all this information…Because you are me…You have permission to bring all that I know now to the past and what I went through…I know some of this information is going to contradict what you believe…And what you have been told…Just because important adults in your life said it is true, doesn’t mean it is true…Trust our new wisdom…We have lived it…We know its truth…

If you need anything you can ask…Anytime…I want you to know you are loved…And safe…There is no judgment of you here

I asked a number of friends and fellow practitioners what they would like to say to their inner child. Take a deep breath and tap along:

You are doing the best you know how to do. Even when you make mistakes you're not doing anything wrong. There is nothing wrong with you.
Jade Barbee

I see you, I honor you. I honor how hard it was for you and all the things you wanted but could not get. I am open to hearing exactly what you still need today and learning how to ask for that need to be met in my life right now. And, in this present moment, I see and honor the beautifully unique and brilliant qualities you have, but learned to keep hidden because it was not safe. I give you permission to totally shine right now with me, because I love you and I understand!
Margaret M. Lynch

You are special, you are loved
Pamela Bruner

You are safe. You are loved. You are perfect. All is well. You are not alone. I am always here.
Rev. Anne Presuel

Trust that what comes to my heart is right for me. The decisions I make can't be connected to what others might think of me.
Tammy Evevard

“You are safe and I, the grown-up, am here to take care of you.
I'm really really sorry that you went through this alone. I'm here now for you.
What you have to say is really really important to me. I'm listening.
((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))
It's okay to be mad. It's okay to be really really really mad. It's okay to be really really really really mad.
Is it okay if I sit next to you for a bit?
Deborah Donndelinger

You are awesome, you matter, and you are worthy and deserving of the best life has to offer.
Brad Yates

“Our life was not designed to be as hard as we make it. We complicate everything with our need to feed our insatiable ego. Often times we become convinced that we must always win, be right, or be considered important in order to be happy.
Life was meant to be simple. We were created to love one another..not to separate ourselves from others. We were created to serve one another…not to be served. We were created to be grateful for the life we have..not lamenting for the things we don't have. We were created to be joyful…not to be creatures of our own fear.
Life is beautiful. I just need to get out of my own way to see it.
Quit being afraid of living a much more simple life.”
John Roedel

You are loved, you are safe, know that I am deeply interested in you, that I love listening to you and that this is only the beginning. Oh and also – that there is always time for play!
Rhona Clews

It is safe to be seen, safe to accept the challenges life offers and really, you can be powerful and kind at the same time.
Andy Bryce

What are the things your inner child needs to hear? Click here to add your own thoughts and comments or read what others have to say. I would really love to hear what you think!

Filed Under: Tools Tagged With: Andy Bryce, Anne Presuel, Brad Yates, Deborah Donngelinger, Jade Barbee, John Roedel, Margaret Lynch, Pamela Bruner, Rhona Clews, Talk To The System, Tammy Evevard

TapAlong: I Can’t Believe It! I Should Have Known Better – Forgiving Myself

February 27, 2012 by Gene Monterastelli

More than once I have thought, “I should have known better.”

There are times when we make mistakes and poor choices where we did the best we could. In hindsight we recognize that we could have done better. There are other times when we knew better and as we were making choices we knew how it would turn out. We knew we were not making the right choices for creating our better self.

These times are particularly hard. It is easy to not forgive ourselves in these moments but we need to be able to heal and move forward. Here is a great little tap along to help with this situation.

Filed Under: Tap Along Tagged With: Premium Member, TapAlong Member

Tapping Ninja Video – Tapping With Photos To Get To Root Issues Quickly

February 26, 2012 by Gene Monterastelli

The key to tapping is finding a way to emotionally tune into the issue at hand. It's a cliche, but a picture really is worth a thousand words and they can be used to connect with emotions and root causes quickly (and without words). In this short video I show you how to use photos in the healing process.

# # # # Add your thoughts and comments # # # #

Video Transcript

Hi! This is Gene Monterastelli, the Editor of TappingQandA.com and welcome to another Tapping Ninja video. We call them Tapping Ninja because they're super powerful like a ninja strike but they’re really quick and they're really simple.

Today, what we're going to do is we’re going to talk about a technique that I was first introduced to by Marie Holliday of EFT Spain, and it’s a very simple photo technique.

As we know, when it comes to tapping the most important thing we can do while tapping is tune into the issue. Now we can say phrases to do that. We can do imagining to do that. There are lots of different ways we can do it, but we just need to find a way to tune in. They say a picture is worth a thousand words and when it comes to tapping, this is really true.

When we take a look at a picture, what we're going to do is we're going to tune into all the emotions we have about what's in the frame. And so what this can do is it can be a really powerful way to tune into an issue without struggling to find the words. All we need to do is take a photo, look at the photo and start tapping.

Now, we can do this in a number of ways. One, we can take a photo of ourselves either how we are currently or how we once were, and just look at the photo and stare at the photo and gaze at the photo and appreciate what’s in the photo and move from tapping point to tapping point.

If any emotions that we have about how we look today or how we look then or how we don’t look today like we did back then, it's going to come to the surface and as we tap from point to point we're going to find our way to relief.

Second, what we can do is we can take a photo of somebody else. Someone who there's an emotional charge around, be it anxiety, feeling of overwhelm, sadness, loss, missing, whatever it is, just stare at the photo and start tapping.

It could be a photo of someone who is a loved one at a time in our life where we had a good relationship with them and we don’t have that today. Or, it could be a time when the relationship was really tumultuous and when we see them in that time, in that space, it brings up an emotional charge.

We just hold the photo up and we move from tapping point to tapping point to tapping point. Again, we don’t have to say anything because the emotions are going to come flooding forward. It’s a really simple thing to do. All you need to do is find a picture. When you're done, put the picture down and move on.

For Tapping Q and A, this is Gene Monterastelli. I’d encourage you to check out all our free instructional videos by going to TappingQandA.com/video. And also make sure you check out the other 400 free resources we have on the site.

Filed Under: Video Tagged With: Photo, Premium Member, TapAlong Member, Tune In, Video

A Thousand Paper Cuts Would Be Better Than Tapping On These Issues – Issues To Be Tapped On Someday

February 24, 2012 by Gene Monterastelli

photo by Justin See

We all have them…

A list of tappable issues that we just never seem to get around to tapping for.

Some of the issues are really big and others are teeny-tiny.

At this moment I don’t care why you aren’t tapping for them; that is a conversation for
another time.

You can do some work on them without having to deal with specifics AND do it right now before any other resistance pops up.

Get a pen and piece of paper. Name the issues you don’t want to tap on.

Make a list.

Don’t think too much.

Just make the list.

Write. Write. Write.

If you are reading this you are not writing…add 3 more things to your list.

Re-read your list.

Take a deep breath.

And tap on this:

Some day I am going to tap on these things…Right now I am not ready…I might be worried about what I am going to unpack…I might be worried that I don’t have enough time right now…It might not feel right at the moment…I might not know where to start…I might not know what the root issues are…I might need to work with someone else to clear these issues…but there is a reason that I am not tapping for these issues right now…I give myself permission to know it is ok not to tap for these right now…Some day I will get to these things…When the time is right…I know that I don’t have to tune into them right now to have some of them start to resolve themselves…I give my system permission to start to work them out on its own…I give my system permission to let me know the right time to do this work…I give my system permission to work on these issues without me having to pay attention…my system knows how to heal…and it has permission to do just that…I don't need to know about this healing…It can just happen on its own…I know that tapping will help these issues some day…that might be today…it might be later…I am easy with myself in knowing I don't have to do it right now…I will get to these issues

Take a deep breath.

Feel better? Good!

What are the issues you struggle to tap on and why? What are some of the ways you get past your resistance? Click here to add your own thoughts and comments or read what others have to say. I would really love to hear what you think!

Filed Under: Tools Tagged With: Goals, Resistance

Pod #75: Tapping For The Power Of Identity w/ Brad Yates

February 22, 2012 by Gene Monterastelli

I want you to imagine you are meeting someone for the very first time. They know nothing about you. You have to describe yourself to that person, but you can only use one word descriptions.

Which words would you use?

Father, wife, grandson, teacher, loving, hopeful…

The labels we give to ourselves can powerfully influence our behaviour. In this interview I chat with Brad Yates about the positive and negative identities we create and how we can use tapping to transform the way we see and define ourselves.


Brad Yates

Guest: Brad Yates

Contact: twitter @EFTWizard; web @ TapWithBrad.com ; facebook @ facebook.com/BradYatesTapping

About Brad: Brad has had the privilege and pleasure of working with a diverse group of clients, from CEOs to professional and NCAA athletes, from chiropractors and psychiatrists to corporate and federal attorneys, from award-winning actors to residents at a program for homeless men and women in Santa Monica. For several years he taught a weekly class using EFT and guided imagery at Sacramento Drug Court. He has also been a presenter at a number of events, including several International Energy Psychology Conferences and the Walk On Water (WOW) Fest in Los Angeles. He has presented at Jack Canfield's Breakthrough to Success event, and has done teleseminars with “The Secret” stars Bob Doyle and Dr. Joe Vitale. He is also the co-author of the bestseller “Freedom at Your Fingertips,” a featured expert in the film “Try It On Everything” (along with Jack Canfield, Bob Proctor, Dr. Norman Shealy and Dr. Bruce Lipton), and has been heard internationally on a number of internet radio talk shows.

Filed Under: Podcast Tagged With: Brad Yates, Identity, Premium Member, Self Esteem, TapAlong Member

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Meet Gene Monterastelli

Gene MonterastelliGene Monterastelli is a Brooklyn based tapping practitioner. In addition to working with individual clients and groups, he regularly writes and records about how to use tapping to move from self-sabotage to productive action.
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