Tapping Q & A with Gene Monterastelli - Get the most out of tapping and EFT

Why You Are So Scared To Take Action

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There are lots of reasons why we don’t take action.

In the end most of those reasons boil down to fear.

We are afraid that we will fail, be judged, look stupid, show that we aren’t good enough, prove that we aren’t worthy of success…and the list goes on.

Sometimes we are able to name our fear clearly but often it is something indistinct that is holding us back, bubbling away in the background.

It makes perfect sense that fear would hold us back from taking action. Fear is a vital primitive response that kicks in when danger threatens our safety. It keeps us safe.

So fear is not the problem.

The problem is when fear shows up in the absence of danger or when we experience fear much larger than is warranted for the situation.

How Big Does The Fear Need To Be?

One of the things I love about NYC in the warmer months is cycling around the city. I put on my helmet and off I go. But that wasn’t always the case.

I can remember when I moved to Washington, DC to go to university. The first time I rode a bike in a major city was a scary experience. I was not used to being just inches away from cars or having to avoid parked cars everywhere.

I grew up in a small town in Wyoming where most cars were parked in driveways, the roads were wide, and with the exception of a few major roadways there was very little traffic.

The difference between today and my first ride in a major city is lots of experience. I don’t cycle in a carefree, thoughtless way today, but because of my experience I know which situations are dangerous and which aren’t.

The Problem Of No Experience

A lack of experience when we are trying new things is one of the reasons that fear crops up. The part of us trying to keep us safe doesn’t know how things are going to turn out so it over reacts and perceives situations as more dangerous than they really are.

The fear of the unknown creates a situation where it is very hard to take action.

How To Tap Before The Action

I find tapping before I try something new really helpful. When I spend a few moments tapping to clear my resistance and fear it allows me to move forward without feeling paralyzed or overwhelmed.

The tapping looks something like this:

I understand that I am about to try something new…And because it’s something that I don’t have a great deal of experience with…There is a part of me that is hesitant…There is a part of me that is worried this won’t work out…There is a part of me that is worried that I don’t even know the right things to be worried about…But I have done new things before…And I have done them successfully…I’m not going to rush in blindly…I am not going to be careless…Or thoughtless…But I trust myself enough to know that I will learn from this attempt…I know that I don’t have to do it perfectly the first time…The next time I do it I will do it better…And I choose to be calm and confident as I embrace this new experience.

After tapping in this fashion I know that I am more likely to take action AND with lowered stress levels my action feels more comfortable and manageable.

Clearing The Fear

If you are looking for help with clearing the fears (named and unnamed) you have before taking action I would encouge you to check out the Ruach Center where you will find over 280 tap-along audios. More than 100 of them are geared towards clearing resistance to action, which shows up in the form of fear.

Pod #134: Having A Plan With Your Tapping w/ Gwyneth Moss

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Knowing how to tap is not enough. We need to have a plan when we approach an issue.

In this interview, Founding EFT Master Gwyneth Moss shares a simple and elegant approach that you can use for every tapping session.

Whether you are new to tapping or have been tapping for decades you will find this 4-step approach useful and it is so easy you can start using it immediately.


Gwyneth Moss

Guest: Gwyneth Moss

Contact: web @ EFThelps.com; email @ contact form; web @ Annual EFT Gathering

About Gwyneth: Gwyneth Moss is one of the original EFT Masters and the founder of the EFT Gathering annual community conference which has run since 2009. With a degree in Physics and an MBA she is known for the clarity and depth of her teaching style and for her innovative techniques which include EFT Imagineering; Protective Distancing; Projection Tapping; The Surrogate EFT Protocol and more. Gwyneth teaches EFT in the glorious countryside of Yorkshire and at Esalen, Big Sur, CA.

Gwyneth is the host and curator of EFT Gathering every year in York, UK. I will be one of the speakers at the event in January 2015. We would love to see you there!

Can I Tap For More Willpower?

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Recently I was working with a client I’ll call “Devon”. During our call she was giving me an update on her week and her progress with her to-do list.

She said, “Things are going really well. I’m starting each day with the tapping we talked about and I’m making lots of good choices in the morning. The problem is that by the end of the day I seem to have no willpower left. Is it possible to tap for more willpower?”

My answer to this was, “No and sort of.”

Let me explain…

[Read more…] about Can I Tap For More Willpower?

Fail Forward Fast

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A few weeks ago I wrote about the main reasons we don’t take action is fear.

Of all the fears we experience the one my clients talk about most is the fear of failure and the consequences that come with failure, such as the waste of time, feeling embarrassed that others have seen us fail, and missing an opportunity, to name just a few.

The truth is that often failing is the best thing that can happen to us because of how much we learn about failure.

Ready! Fire! Aim!

There is a common misconception about the skill of sharpshooters. Most people believe that they are so skilled and prepare so much for a shot that when they fire they are prefect.

In reality, particularly for long distance shots, they quickly line up the best shot they can and once they have fired, they follow the trajectory of the bullet. When they see where their first shot lands they have a better understanding of the conditions (like wind). They rapidly adjust and fire again.

The second bullet is fired so quickly that their target hasn’t had a chance to respond to the first shot.

You could see the first shot as a failure as it missed the target, but because a lot was learned from the first shot, the second is much more precise.

Fail Forward Fast

When successful business men and women are asked what they would do differently in growing their businesses a common response is, “I would have made my mistakes much quicker. I didn’t know what I didn’t know and my assumptions were flawed. Only through trial and error did I find my way to the right path.”

In the first press conference after Cam Cameron was hired as head coach of the Miami Dolphins he declared that the team was going to “fail forward fast”. He was setting the tone for his players and coaches that mistakes were OK as long as they were made in the right direction and lessons were learned from them.

Not Failing For Failure’s Sake

It’s important to note in the sharpshooter example that the first shot is fired with thought, training, and experience. Once a reasonable shot is lined up feedback is gathered from the results.

When we take action we are not doing it mindlessly or carelessly. We are not seeking failure just so we can claim progress from it.

Instead we are doing enough planning to take a reasonable action that will move us forward and if we do fail we will also have the opportunity to learn from it.

Here is a simple way to tap to help you to take action when the fear of failure is holding you back:

There is a part of me that is afraid that I will fail…Failure is no fun..Failure hurts…Failure shows others I can’t do this…Failure is a waste of time…Failure is a waste of an opportunity…Because I am worried about failure I am not taking action…I recognize the fact that everything I can do today…At some point I couldn’t do it…And I failed many times while learning how to do it…When I fail I am gaining real world experience…And that will help me to make better choices next time…I will never get it perfect by planning and planning and planning…At some point I need to take action…I am not going to be careless…And I am not going to be thoughtless…I give myself permission to take action knowing I won’t be perfect…Because I can make progress and be successful without having to be perfect…I have survived failure before and I will survive it again…I am not failing just to fail…I am not seeking failure…But when it happens I will make the most of it.

Clearing The Fear

If you are looking for help clearing the fears (named and unnamed) you have before taking action I would encourage you to check out the Ruach Center where you will find over 280 tap-along audios, with over 100 of them geared towards clearing resistance to action which shows up in the form of fear.

There are over 45 minutes of tap-along audios geared to dealing with the fear of failure and over 30 minutes designed specifically to clear the need to be perfect before taking action.

Pod #133: EFT For Our Goal w/ Steve Wells

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I love having conversations with Steve Wells. When we started this one we decided that we’d talk about how we can use tapping to improve the quality of our working lives.

In the end we used the issues and obstacles we face at work to explore a much larger topic of how we can use tapping to take action AND how we can use taking action to help us uncover those things we need to tap on.

It turned into a great discussion about goals.

Put simply, if you would like to take actions to improve your life and are having a hard time doing so, then you should listen to this conversation.

Guest: Steve Wells

Contact: web @ EFTDownunder.com

About Steve: Steve Wells is an international leadership coach and peak performance consultant based in Perth, Western Australia. He helps people to overcome the hidden blocks to achieving their goals and getting what they really want from life.

Steve was one of the first to apply tapping to performance enhancement work with elite athletes and to take tapping to the corporate environment. He regularly teaches and consults worldwide with elite sport and business achievers to improve their performance and enhance the performance of their teams.

Steve is co-creator (with Dr David Lake) of the user-friendly tapping approach Simple Energy Techniques (SET) and the unique advanced Energy-based approach Provocative Energy Techniques (PET). He has helped thousands of people through his worldwide personal development and professional training workshops.

Steve is on the faculty of the Curtin University Centre for Entrepreneurship, where he presents to business owners and senior leaders on peak performance and resilience. He is also on the faculty of the Emotional Intelligence Institute. He is co-author of 4 books, including Enjoy Emotional Freedom.

Steve’s programs and presentations are always inspiring, engaging and filled with powerful practical strategies you can use immediately to get better results – with less stress.

Getting More Help In Clearing The Blocks To Taking Action

If this conversation struck a chord with you, helping you to recognize that there are a number of tappable issues that are holding you back from taking action, I would encourage you to check out the Ruach Center. The Ruach Center was built to help you to identify and clear the blocks to taking action.