Recently I was working with a client I’ll call “Devon”. During our call she was giving me an update on her week and her progress with her to-do list.
She said, “Things are going really well. I’m starting each day with the tapping we talked about and I’m making lots of good choices in the morning. The problem is that by the end of the day I seem to have no willpower left. Is it possible to tap for more willpower?”
My answer to this was, “No and sort of.”
Let me explain…
A few weeks ago I wrote about the main reasons we don’t take action is fear.
Of all the fears we experience the one my clients talk about most is the fear of failure and the consequences that come with failure, such as the waste of time, feeling embarrassed that others have seen us fail, and missing an opportunity, to name just a few.
The truth is that often failing is the best thing that can happen to us because of how much we learn about failure.
There is a common misconception about the skill of sharpshooters. Most people believe that they are so skilled and prepare so much for a shot that when they fire they are prefect.
In reality, particularly for long distance shots, they quickly line up the best shot they can and once they have fired, they follow the trajectory of the bullet. When they see where their first shot lands they have a better understanding of the conditions (like wind). They rapidly adjust and fire again.
The second bullet is fired so quickly that their target hasn’t had a chance to respond to the first shot.
You could see the first shot as a failure as it missed the target, but because a lot was learned from the first shot, the second is much more precise.
When successful business men and women are asked what they would do differently in growing their businesses a common response is, “I would have made my mistakes much quicker. I didn’t know what I didn’t know and my assumptions were flawed. Only through trial and error did I find my way to the right path.”
In the first press conference after Cam Cameron was hired as head coach of the Miami Dolphins he declared that the team was going to “fail forward fast”. He was setting the tone for his players and coaches that mistakes were OK as long as they were made in the right direction and lessons were learned from them.
It’s important to note in the sharpshooter example that the first shot is fired with thought, training, and experience. Once a reasonable shot is lined up feedback is gathered from the results.
When we take action we are not doing it mindlessly or carelessly. We are not seeking failure just so we can claim progress from it.
Instead we are doing enough planning to take a reasonable action that will move us forward and if we do fail we will also have the opportunity to learn from it.
Here is a simple way to tap to help you to take action when the fear of failure is holding you back:
There is a part of me that is afraid that I will fail…Failure is no fun..Failure hurts…Failure shows others I can’t do this…Failure is a waste of time…Failure is a waste of an opportunity…Because I am worried about failure I am not taking action…I recognize the fact that everything I can do today…At some point I couldn’t do it…And I failed many times while learning how to do it…When I fail I am gaining real world experience…And that will help me to make better choices next time…I will never get it perfect by planning and planning and planning…At some point I need to take action…I am not going to be careless…And I am not going to be thoughtless…I give myself permission to take action knowing I won’t be perfect…Because I can make progress and be successful without having to be perfect…I have survived failure before and I will survive it again…I am not failing just to fail…I am not seeking failure…But when it happens I will make the most of it.
If you are looking for help clearing the fears (named and unnamed) you have before taking action I would encourage you to check out the Ruach Center where you will find over 280 tap-along audios, with over 100 of them geared towards clearing resistance to action which shows up in the form of fear.
There are over 45 minutes of tap-along audios geared to dealing with the fear of failure and over 30 minutes designed specifically to clear the need to be perfect before taking action.
I love having conversations with Steve Wells. When we started this one we decided that we’d talk about how we can use tapping to improve the quality of our working lives.
In the end we used the issues and obstacles we face at work to explore a much larger topic of how we can use tapping to take action AND how we can use taking action to help us uncover those things we need to tap on.
It turned into a great discussion about goals.
Put simply, if you would like to take actions to improve your life and are having a hard time doing so, then you should listen to this conversation.
Guest: Steve Wells
Contact: web @ EFTDownunder.com
About Steve: Steve Wells is an international leadership coach and peak performance consultant based in Perth, Western Australia. He helps people to overcome the hidden blocks to achieving their goals and getting what they really want from life.
Steve was one of the first to apply tapping to performance enhancement work with elite athletes and to take tapping to the corporate environment. He regularly teaches and consults worldwide with elite sport and business achievers to improve their performance and enhance the performance of their teams.
Steve is co-creator (with Dr David Lake) of the user-friendly tapping approach Simple Energy Techniques (SET) and the unique advanced Energy-based approach Provocative Energy Techniques (PET). He has helped thousands of people through his worldwide personal development and professional training workshops.
Steve is on the faculty of the Curtin University Centre for Entrepreneurship, where he presents to business owners and senior leaders on peak performance and resilience. He is also on the faculty of the Emotional Intelligence Institute. He is co-author of 4 books, including Enjoy Emotional Freedom.
Steve’s programs and presentations are always inspiring, engaging and filled with powerful practical strategies you can use immediately to get better results – with less stress.
If this conversation struck a chord with you, helping you to recognize that there are a number of tappable issues that are holding you back from taking action, I would encourage you to check out the Ruach Center. The Ruach Center was built to help you to identify and clear the blocks to taking action.
Good morning!
On Thursday something amazing happened.
TappingQandA.com received its one millionth page view!
It is hard to believe that a simple website that started as a hobby has grown into a site with over 550 resources and close to 100 hours of free audios.
TappingQandA.com has changed my life. I have made friends all over the world, I have learned a great deal, and I hope that I have provided a resource or two that you have found useful along the way.
As a thank you for all your support I would like to offer you a special deal on one-on-one sessions with me.
I am offering 33% off a single session and 25% off a bundle of 5 sessions.
If you would like to take advantage of this deal go to: http://WorkWithGene.com.
At checkout use the discount code “singlemillion” to receive the discount on a single session.
Use the discount code “bundlemillion” to receive the discount on a bundle of 5 sessions.
Thank you for being part of the 1,000,000 page views.
Here’s to 1,000,000 more!
Gene
One of the most powerful things I have done to improve my productivity is spending a few moments every morning tapping on my to-do list.
When I clear away all the emotional resistance to the items on my to-do list I find myself easily able to take action throughout the day.
I have also found that I do the highest value tasks first, making sure I achieve the most of my time.
I was talking about this technique recently at the Spring Energy Event in New York and my friend Kris Ferraro was in the audience. Kris does all the interviews for the Tapping Insiders Club and she asked if I would explain in detail how I use the technique.
Here is our conversation so you can add it to your morning as well.
Over in the Ruach Center we have over 200 tap-along audios dealing with resistance to taking action.
Full details here: Ruach Center.