My client was so frustrated!
We had been working on an issue for a number of sessions and he felt like we were dealing with the same issues, with the same complaints, with the same outcomes.
The truth was that he had made a lot of progress AND he was getting the same outcome.
When this happens it can be so frustrating because we have put in the work, we know we have healed many issues, but it doesn’t feel like it is bearing any fruit.
I’m Stuck In Quicksand!
Sometimes making progress feels like trying to get out of quicksand.
There is a huge difference between being in quicksand up to your neck and being in quicksand up to your knees. When you are in quicksand up to your neck you are only 10% free and when you are in up to your knees you are 75% free.
But there is a problem. Even though being in quicksand up to your knees is much better than being in quicksand up to your neck, you are still stuck.
The same thing can happen when we are working on a persistent issue. We can spend time (even a great deal of time) working on an issue. Although we have released a great deal around the issue we are still stuck because the part that is left continues to have a grip on us.
It is easy to feel discouraged and like we are failing in the healing process because we are not reaping the rewards of our progress. The good news is that it’s much easier to get out of quicksand when we are only up to our knees, and we truly are much closer to freedom and healing, but we may fail to notice this because we are focusing on still being stuck.
If you feel like you are spinning your wheels with your tapping here is a tapping script you can use:
I have been working on this issue for a very long time…I want to be free of this issue…I know tapping has worked for me in the past…and I want it to work now…the fact that I have done so much work…and not seen any real progress is frustrating…I feel like giving up on this issue…I feel like giving up on tapping…but I choose to know that tapping is a process…I know healing is a process…there are times when I will make progress with an issue…and still not be free of the issue…sometimes healing an issue is like getting out of quicksand…I can make progress when I am working my way towards freedom…but I am still stuck…it is possible to recognize that even when I am not completely free of an issue…I am closer to being free of the issue…with each round of tapping I become a little clearer…with each tapping session I become a little clearer…even if I am not completely out of the quicksand on this issue…I am more free than I was before…I am closer to being free of this…I give myself permission to keep moving forward…knowing that with each moment of healing I experience…I am that much closer to being free of this issue…it is ok that I get frustrated at the fact that it doesn’t feel like I am making progress…it is ok that I feel this isn’t working as fast as I would like…this is because there is a part of me that wants better…I am glad there is a part of me that wants better…and I want this part of me to keep working for better…as bit-by-bit I clear this issue.
Andy Hunt says
I think some of this problem is an unintended side-effect of all those one-minute wonder stories. In the “olden days” people would have expected to have years of counselling or therapy to make progress, now our expectations are higher.
On a practical level it’s worth focussing our clients attention on what is different and what is better, rather than what is the same and what is bad. If I were to focus on the benefits of being 90% free of quicksand versus the problems of 10% stuck then I would feel a lot better off and more motivated to carry on to resolve the last 10% of stuckness