[Note: This is part 7 of a 10 part series on using EFT/Tapping for weight release with a new article or podcast being added every 10 days. The complete series can be found @ weight release series.]
photo by lfl |
Much of the time we spend with loved ones food is present. It can be in the form of celebration, gift, or just mealtime with loved ones. Because food is present in so may different aspects of our relationships our relationship to food can get tangled up in our relationship to relationships.
Here are two examples:
Being Shown Love With Food
Food is literal nourishment and many times can be put into a place of metaphorical nourishment. I think the old wives tale is, “Feed a cold; starve a fever”. In my house growing up we always joked, “Feed a cold; feed a fever; feed a sprained ankle.”
When we are trying to make someone feel better, showing them sympathy for a loss, or celebrating something we show up with food. Because of this it can become very easy for us to equate food with love. The subconscious can make the connections that “Many times when there is food present people are showing me love and affections. Therefore, if I have food present I will have love and affection.”
You don’t have to have a post gradate degree in logic to see how wrong that statement is, but it can create a very powerful link in the subconscious mind. When this sort of link is created the body will crave food everything time it is feeling sad or lonely. It is no surprise that we call it comfort food.
Tapping for this might look like:
I know there are many times in my life where food has been a central element…food is present when we celebrate…when we grieve…when we care for each other…food is a wonderful way to show love and affection…just because I am doing this work does not mean that I am going to stop using food as one expression of love…and it does not mean that I am going to stop accepting food as others expression of love…but food does not equal love…food is not the same as love…when I eat food I am not going to find love…love and food can be present at the same time…food can be an expression of love…food is not love…food does not equal love…it is good my system is seeking love…I need love…but I am not going to find it in food…right now I am going to speak to the part of me that thinks food equals love…thank you for wanting more love in my life…i want more love in my life as well…but I am not going to get that love by having food…there are time that when people love me they bring food…but food and love are not the same thing…right now I am going to think of three examples of what real love is…so you can see that love has many form…(tap as long as you need to as you think of these things)…thank you for trying to fill my life with love…I now ask that you help me fill my life in new ways
The Only Time We Get Together Is With Food
I grew up in a wonderful family. One of the rules in the house while growing up was that we ate dinner together. Even when my parents, my siblings, and myself we involved in school, community, church, and sporting activities we ate dinner together.
I am not sure what I thought about it at the time. I have a feeling I gave it little thought then. In hindsight it was a real blessing.
With that being said, it is very easy for the subconscious mind to take a feeling like that and twist it around. It can conclude, “If I serve a meal…then everyone will come around…and we can spend quality time together…and we will be a happy loving family.”
Again, there isn’t a straight line to this logic. Just because a family is gathering around a table doesn’t mean that it is doing it in a loving way. Not all families work the same way. For some families meal times were the most chaotic time because everyone had to be in the same place. By doing this we can cause two problems. First, we can be creating lots of extra meals we don’t need because we are trying to create connections. Second, when those connections don’t work out we can get stress or frustrated causing us to eat more.
In part 8 of this series we will look at the why we sabotage our own success.
Would you like to work with Gene one-on-one with your weight release? Here is the current weight release special.
Karylee Bonta says
Hi! My first thought about relationships and food is that I know I have eaten foods to reminded myself of childhood loving relationships at times when I was extremely aware of feeling unloved or feeling life was devoid of almost anything that gave it meaning. Very thought-provoking, Gene.
Sue T. says
Good article, I can relate to Karylee’s comment above. The other aspect I can think of was provoked by the phrase: “If I serve a meal…then everyone will come around…and we can spend quality time together…and we will be a happy loving family.” For me, it is more like, “My family is coming, I have to put good food out for them!”
One more thing which may not exactly fit here, but there is this thing where I keep certain treats in the house which I buy ‘for the kids’ because they deserve treats once in a while, and they smile and are happy with me when I give them some. I actually keep these ‘hidden from the kids’, and sometimes they never even know they were in the house. It’s like my emergency fund.