I live in New York City, a pedestrian city where most people don’t drive. Even when you take mass transit you still need to walk a lot just to get around. The subway stop I use most is 3/4 of a mile walk from my apartment.
As a result, people here tend to be healthier than the national average because of the daily walking they’re required to do, so I see far fewer obese people in NYC than I do in other parts of the United States.
Back in 2014 when this was originally recorded, I was in a rural part of the US. As we were entering a restaurant there was a group of people walking out. Two members of the group leaving the restaurant were obese; they were so big it was hard for them to walk.
And this is the really embarrassing part…when I saw them my first thought and emotion was one of disgust. It washed over my whole body so intensely that I felt sick to my stomach for a second.
The second emotion was of total shame for being disgusted. I was, and am, so disappointed in myself.
When something like this happens, our emotional response is about us. It is about how we see ourselves, the world, and what we think is safe. My feelings of disgust had little to do with the people I saw and everything to do with how I see myself.
In this recording you will hear me tap in real time for the feelings of disgust I experienced, the shame that soon followed, and all the issues that came up as I found my way to the root causes of those feelings.
You can find the full tapping script as a pdf of this audio over at Tapping Q and A Podcast Scripts and Transcripts.
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Click here to Read what others have to say or add your own thoughts and comments. I would really love to hear what you think!
Hi Gene,
Greetings again from Ireland; and many thanks for the very useful Podcast.
I venture to say that subconsciously there is undoubtedly a lot of sympathy and empathy in your involvement and preparation of the Tapping material, due to the ramifications of such obesity for the 2 persons observed.
Many thanks again, and stay Safe and Well.
Brendan Quinn
I liked this pod cast because it was raw and honest. Sometimes I need to get to those places more with myself. It was great that you were able to take what you learned and direct it even more effectively to what you struggle with. I like your pod casts as they have depth and variety.
Gene,
Thanks for sharing real time and so candidly. I am judging someone right now (a friend who is always late) and feeling both shame and superiority. I am almost never late and it realky irks me… and I can’t see the connection to something relevant in me…and know tapping might shed some light. I adore this friend. She is kind, compassionate, present, etc) so my feelings confuse me. I hear myself say ” get your sh●t together” to her in silence…and maybe its my own sh○t I need to get together but in diff ways. ? Not sure, will explore:) Thanks for encouraging me to deal with it and go deeper. And to do so with some kindness.
Hi Gene,
Thanks for sharing your work and your process so freely and generously. I haven’t listened to many of your pod casts, however, I just listened to your most recent, “What my reaction to others say about me”. It was perfect for me in many ways. I have been looking at this concept for years and it always gives me lots to work on. This particular topic hit home for me today. It triggered the following: My own challenges with my weight and body image, particularly the work that I am currently doing with EFT and addressing my childhood issues; my personal beliefs about being successful and at the same time being aware of and working on issues. Your podcast helped me go a bit deeper today. So,thank you! Many blessings on your path… Maria
Thank you Gene, for sharing that type of tapping with us. I find it valuable, and I appreciate your willingness to be vulnerable. I do share your website with my clients (even though I may ‘lose’ them to you) because I think you offer such helpful information for all tappers, from beginning to professional.
I absolutely love the fact that your humility allowed you to share this most personal tapping issue regarding the folks you saw coming out of the restaurant.
I found it quite invaluable, and so would love to share more of your tapping experiences.
One question: did you use the entire sequence or just tap on the side of the hand.
I tapped along with you and used the entire sequence.
Grace,
Yes, I did move from point to point after staring on the side of the hand.
I found your approach helpful in my (seemingly) endless struggle with nerve pain. I placed the shame of (perceived) weakness with that you observed in others. As though my pain did not belong to me. The tapping once again brought it into better clarity. It’s been a 4 year struggle and still looking for answers. I struggle with judging myself. Thanks.
Gene, I feel that whatever comes up for you would resonate with other hearts and minds as well. Thank you for your sincerity.
Really nice share Gene. Thank you.
Gene
Thank you for your honesty and your openness.
I have found you to be honest and generous.
Peace and healing.
Carol
Hi Gene,
I really loved this! I have always wondered how more experienced practitioners tap on their own stuff and this was a great example. I got a lot out of it with my own personal body image and weight issues as well as my judgements of others.
Thank you!
Thank you so much for sharing this. It touched me so deeply that I was crying throughout the tapping as I connected my judgements to my own shortcomings.
And I love, love, love that you shared how you tap for yourself, as it validated my own attempts!
Thank you very much for your experience Gene. Very useful for me. I was tapping along and stareted to cry at the certain moment, when I felt how my 88 years old mother is suffering with her acking body and I was thinking how we transfer our unresolved problems to our body and I’ll work on that issue again. Be well and we’ll try to improve with you.
That was a great tap along. I have had similar experiences and I truly needed that tapping.
Thanks for being honest and up front.
I appreciate it!
Thank you, Gene! Your sharing of your personal work is indeed helpful and I would appreciate your making a regular feature of it! That particular topic was (of course) cosmically timely for me and I will tap along with you again soon on it- Jenny
Thanks Gene, really good, it is addressing these everyday, knee jerk emotions that in the end I have found to result in the deepest clearings. After 60 years of living, I have found that being open to forgive myself and others, in the context of forgiving as you describe it, results in some of the most effective and deepest releases.
However, doubt does creep in as to the honesty of my forgiveness – it seems too easy. Really useful to know that you and others are also having these doubts as well – I am human after all!
I am learning to accept that just because something feels easy does not mean it has less value than something that feels hard. That has been one of lessons that EFT has been trying to teach me for years – I think I am finally starting to get it!
Please do more of these podcasts.
Love Amer xx
I have been working on weight issues, and the shame associated with being obese. I have lived my life judging people by their physical shape instead of the rest of them. I know how hard I have worked to lose the weight over and over again, only to regain it. I have forgiven myself. Just recently through the Word Tapping Summit, I learned that I was holding on to shame and that was what was holding me back. It was not an easy process and thus this tapping session you actually brought all the learning from the past few months into perspective. Thank you for sharing.
Hi Gene,
Love your sensitivity to a sensitive topic….please add more tapping scripts or experiences on this and similar issues. Very helpful~~
Thanks.
Recently I observed myself feeling revulsion for someone else’s addictive behaviors – someone who is very dear to me. The revulsion was severely rejecting of this loved one. This emotion not only made me feel shame, but a great deal of sorrow as well. Also, I felt like some kind of inhuman monster that I could just dismiss someone I love from my heart in such a cold-hearted way.
Thank you, Gene, for not only reminding me that it was only one part of me that felt that way, but that it is a scared part that needs love and compassion, just as the other person does, for healing to take place. It is afraid that my own addictive behaviors are condemning me and putting me in danger.
The people who parented me believed that judgement and punishment were necessary to change undesirable behaviors, and those beliefs were programmed into my subconscious. I’ve worked long to change those beliefs and will no doubt work even longer. Thanks for help along the way.
Gene, this was an exceptionally excellent podcast, and I admire you for sharing your thoughts and feelings so openly. Thank you for all you do for this community.
Gene,
Interesting…just recently I had similar thoughts about a couple of people that I know, and I noticed my judgment. I did some tapping, but knew there were layers. So, I really appreciate you sharing this! Jessica O recently did a Summit session on body shaming/image as well.
Blessings and Thanks to you!
Thank you for being open and honest and sharing part of your personal journey. I think we all deal with judgement and it is definitely something I am trying to work on. This was helpful and I will remember this podcast.
Namaste
Thank you for this podcast. Your openess is appreciated. I have marked this as a favourite to come back to regularly because I struggle with this very much. Your words speak so clearly right to the source of the problem and I feel it will help me to keep your words close by. Thank you for all that you do and strive to do.
Your best podcast, Gene. More, please.
I listened in 2021, I had heard it before and it remains powerful. I have changed in the last 6 – 7 years so the examples that came up as I tapped were different and I think deeper in there more everyday sense. As is often the case, I appreciated how much I really needed this particular tapping at this time in my life. Thanks for bringing it to my attention again Gene. Love Amer
Gene,
For me this podcast was anything but indulgent. A wonderful learning tool via real time engagement with a personal issue and how the willingness to be vulnerable and honest to the best of one’s ability provides forward movement toward greater healing as well as personal integrity. I teach a form of bodywork and almost always bring up the value of EFT, and while I have spent some time on various EFT educator/practitioner websites, yours is the only one I recommend they investigate for further education. Thank you for all that you bring to the table via your offerings. What a wonderful gift to help make individual human lives and the world a better place. May you be blessed in many ways.