Note: To get 2019 off on the right foot, we're going to end 2018 and begin the new year with a four-part series on how to make what I call "pro-you choices". These are choices that are all about taking care of yourself. This is Part 2 of 4. You can find all four parts in the Pro-You Choices Series.
The month of December is a super busy time of year. There are work parties, holiday parties, meals with friends, family obligations, performances, recitals…the list goes on and on.
In a vacuum, going to any one of these events is fine, but when they stack up on top of each other they can just become too much.
Actor and comedian John Hodgman wrote last week in his newsletter:
ALL SOCIAL PLANS ARE OPTIONAL. Especially HOLIDAY PARTIES. Everyone will understand if you can’t make it. They probably won’t even notice you’re not there (sorry, narcissists!).
And if it’s a one-on-one thing, that’s OK too. Your friend will forgive you if you cancel. They will probably be relieved, too.
There is a part of you that knows this, and there is a part of you that feels like you are failing if you follow through and actually do this. Â
This week I have a tap-along audio (with script below the player) that will help you to give yourself permission to say “no” to at least one invitation so that you are happier and healthier this holiday season
The holiday season is crazy…There are so many things going on…There are so many invitations that I have received..There’s a part of me that feels like I have to say yes to all of it…There’s a part of me that feels as if I’m letting other people down if I don’t go…There is a part of me that feels like I am missing out if I don’t say yes…I recognize the fact it is OK for me to say no…I recognize the fact it is OK for me to turn something down…If I say no…I’m not making a judgment about the thing I’m saying no to…I’m simply saying it’s not a good fit for me in the midst of all of this…The reality is that if I don’t go to something, most people won’t notice…The reality is most people won’t care…Some people will even be jealous at my courage in saying no…It is OK for me to say no…It is possible that some people might get bent out of shape if I say no…It is possible that some people will be frustrated if I say no…I am not responsible for their emotional state…I’m not responsible for how they feel about my choice…If they want to be bent out of shape because I said no to an invitation…They’re allowed to do that…That is their choice…I am not responsible for that…I give myself permission to take care of myself…I give myself permission to be thoughtful about what I say yes to…I give myself permission to look at the whole season and make good healthy decisions based on my needs…If I don’t put myself first, no one else is going to…If I don’t take care of myself, no one else is going to…I give myself permission to make healthy choices…Saying no to an invitation is a great way for me to take care of myself…I don’t have to feel guilty about saying no…I don’t have to explain why I’m saying no…I am simply taking care of myself…I am worthy of taking care of myself.