EFT/Tapping Q and A with Gene Monterastelli - Emotional Freedom Techniques

Archives for January 2013

Bonus Pod #29: Not Everything That Feels Personal Is Personal (And How To Respond With EFT)

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It is really hard when we are hurt by other people’s choices and actions and it’s very easy to take those actions personally. We think, “Why would they do that to hurt me?”

In reality we are often hurt by something others have said or done which is the consequence of a choice motivated by something else entirely. Most of the time their intention was never to hurt us.

But we are hurt nonetheless.

In this podcast we talk about the best way to respond when we are hurt by the words or actions of others.

This Is Just Like My Mother/Father

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photo by sean dreilinger

I’ve noticed a pattern in my life that is just like my parents and I can’t seem to tap it away. Is there something special I need to do when dealing with issues that I have picked up from my parents?

It makes perfect sense that we pick up the patterns, traits, and beliefs from our parents. They are the ones who cared for us and taught us during our most formative years. Not all of these patterns and beliefs are helpful. Tapping/Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) is great for dealing with issues, but I have found in my work with clients it can be particularly hard to deal with beliefs that have been passed on to us by people we love and respect.

It is possible for us to feel that when we are letting go of these beliefs we are also dismissing, letting go, or disrespecting the people who gave us them to us.

The subconscious can think:

  • If I let go of this I am saying I don’t love my mother
  • If I let go of this I am saying that I am letting go of my father
  • If I let go of this I am saying that my mother was wrong
  • If I let go of this I am saying that my father is not worth anything to me

When we believe any of these things it makes it difficult for us to release those beliefs that are no longer serving us, and to heal and move forward. In order to heal we need to recognize that it is possible to let go of the beliefs held by people who are very important to us, without dismissing or diminishing our relationship with them.

In this example we will assume that we’re working on a money issue passed on to us by our father. Tapping might look like this:

I know that I am approaching money just like my father…and I know that this approach is not serving me…but there is a part of me that doesn’t want to let go this belief…there is a part of me that believes that if I let this belief go then I am also letting go my father…I am saying that my father was wrong…I am saying that I don’t love my father…I am saying that I am not grateful for what my father has done for me…but I know this isn’t true…I can let go of beliefs that my father had without letting go of my father…I can know that I love my father and that my father loves but and not hold everything he said or did as true…my father was imperfect…and it is OK to say that he was and is imperfect…and there are many beliefs that served him in a time and place that don’t serve me…parents want what is best for us…and they might think that one way is right…but even when they want things for us that aren’t perfect for us…they do this because they want what is best for us…I can do what is best for me and still love my father…I can do what is best for me and still appreciate everything my father has done for me…I can do what is best for me and keep the relationship strong…letting go of something my father has given me is not the same as letting go of him

Pod #96: Best Practices To Get The Most Out Of EFT w/ Dawson Church, Ph.D.

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EFT is a very powerful tool for bringing about change and can be used in many different settings. It can be done alone, with a practitioner, in groups, in short bursts, over a number of sessions, and over the telephone or Skype.

As time passes not only are studies being done to explore what EFT is effective for, but the data from these studies is also being used to uncover the best ways to use EFT.

In this interview Dawson Church and I discuss what these studies tell us about how to get the most out of EFT. (There are even a few things that I found surprising.)


Dawson Church, Ph. D.

Guest: Dawson Church, Ph.D

Contact: web @ EFTUniverse.com

Bio: Dawson Church is the author/coauthor of 8 books (including The Genie In Your Genes) and manages the web site EFTUniverse.com. He travels the world as a trainer and speaker. His passion is tapping and getting tapping into the hands of those who could benefit most from its power.

My Holiday Embarrassment

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I spent the Christmas holiday in my home state of Wyoming. The last night I was home my sister asked if I could share a way she could tap for a friend who was grappling with a lot of difficult changes in his life.

I spent about 30 minutes talking my sister (and my mother) through the “Talk About, Talk To, Talk As If” tool.

My sister then asked if it would a good idea if we tapped for a family member, “Bob,” who was having a particularly hard time.

It hit me like a ton of bricks… not only could Bob use some surrogate tapping, so could so many people in my life. And not just the people who were having a really tough time.

In the “My EFT Year” project I am obviously making it a priority to look at my goals but somehow I had lost track of what was outside me.

Then my mother asked if anyone has ever tried tapping on world peace… and again I felt crushed by disappointment. I knew things like this had been done before (see crime reduction in Washington, DC).

Years ago I even created the website Tapping4Peace.com encouraging people to do just that.

I regularly tap surrogately for people who ask, but somehow I lost my way in just tapping for others in my life.

For the last week I have been finding a little time each day to tap for others. I am not doing anything too complicated, just thinking of a loved one and of all the wonderful things I would like to show up in their life, and tapping.

It only takes two or three minutes.

It is really that simple.

By doing this regularly it has changed my daily disposition and has helped me to act in a more loving way.

Give it a try.

It will only take two minutes.

And let me know below how it goes.

Pod #95: EFT For Self Love And The Power Of Self-Love w/ Brad Yates

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It is very easy to say (especially in tough times) “All we need is love”.

The hard part is to know what that means beyond bumper sticker sentimentality.

In this interview with Brad Yates we talk about in real terms what is love, what is self-love, and most importantly how can we use EFT to feel a sense of love in a tangible way.


Brad Yates

Guest: Brad Yates

Contact: twitter @EFTWizard; web @ TapWithBrad.com ; facebook @ facebook.com/BradYatesTapping

About Brad: Brad has had the privilege and pleasure of working with a diverse group of clients, from CEOs to professional and NCAA athletes, from chiropractors and psychiatrists to corporate and federal attorneys, from award-winning actors to residents at a program for homeless men and women in Santa Monica. For several years he taught a weekly class using EFT and guided imagery at Sacramento Drug Court. He has also been a presenter at a number of events, including several International Energy Psychology Conferences and the Walk On Water (WOW) Fest in Los Angeles. He has presented at Jack Canfield’s Breakthrough to Success event, and has done teleseminars with “The Secret” stars Bob Doyle and Dr. Joe Vitale. He is also the co-author of the bestseller “Freedom at Your Fingertips,” a featured expert in the film “Try It On Everything” (along with Jack Canfield, Bob Proctor, Dr. Norman Shealy and Dr. Bruce Lipton), and has been heard internationally on a number of internet radio talk shows.